Erica is having relationship problems…with her older married boyfriend. Here is her email…
Yi guys! I have been having an affair with a married man. I know it's wrong but the chemistry between us is amazing and the relations are incredible. Now, he's offering to pay my rent on an apartment that's near his work so he can see me more often. I'm not sure I want to get that serious because he's quite a bit older than me and I like my freedom. He also keeps saying he's going to leave his wife and continues to gift me with jewelry, vacations and other great things. Am I a fool to believe this is going to last? My best friend says I'm being used while my sister says I should enjoy the 'perks' while I can? What do you think?
Slacker and Steve receive emails all the time asking for help like this and still try to keep an open mind every time one comes in. Steve says that Erica should take the emotion out of it and just keep things going the way they are now. All the problems in a relationship start when people stop thinking logically. He says they should just take it for what it is right now and no one will get hurt. Slacker, on the other hand, says that this can’t end well no matter what happens. Even if he did leave his wife to be with her, she is always gonna wonder if there’s another woman when he says he has to work late or something. Plus, if she accepted the apartment now, she’s kind of obligated to be on his schedule. Slacker used this as a scenario… Say that he tells his wife he’s going to work late one night and wants to be with Erica for relations. But Erica isn’t really in to it that night and says she doesn’t feel like it, he could tell her he doesn’t feel like writing the rent check that month. Tricky, tricky.
What advice do you have for Erica?
Hmm…I’m going to have to agree with Slacker, I don’t see this ending well whatsoever. Sure, the gifts are nice and all but it is very prostitute sounding. If she’s in love with him than she needs to talk about it but she is always going to remember this part of the relationship if things progress. I say, woman up, pay your own way and stop seeing him. He’s a bad guy.