Not being able to go to the bathroom because your maid is cleaning it, your steering wheel isn't heated like your seats, buying groceries but not having enough room for them in the fridge. What do all of these have in common? They are first world problems!
Slacker is seriously ripping into Steve for his valve stem caps. He agrees that the ALS ice bucket challenge is kind of sick when there are countries with no clean water. He admits America is being a total d-bag about it. Slacker has four mac book pros and he can text other iPhones from his computer. But, every time he texts a person that doesn’t have an iPhone, he has to go find his iPhone. He has all Mac products and the whole line of Mac Book Pros/ iPads, except for the Mac Book Air and he is very upset about it!
Steve bought a new Audi and he also bought new valve stem caps to match it. He customized them and bought two different styles. He was going through a house remodel and now he can’t find his custom valve stem caps and he is very upset about it. That is his first world problem.
Lil D has a water cooler at his house and it doesn’t get the water cold enough so he has to use ice every time. The condensation from the last glass stained his furniture. He also has his Apple TV, Xbox, and his DVD player but only has 2 HDMI converters on the back of his TV! Ugh!!
What is your first world problem?
I can’t find the remote to my fan and now I die of heat at night. UGH!
Impulse Buy by Slacker and Steve,posted Aug 28 2014 5:20PM
The number one impulse buy is food you don't need. Americans, on average, spend $3,000 on coffee and lunch per year! That's crazy! But what about beer? A man in a Vegas night club decided he wanted to build a fort made out of cardboard beer boxes. He bought $80,000 worth of beer just for the boxes, and he built his fort. Here’s a list of the most impulse buys:
Groceries You Don’t Need (or Really Even Want)
The Beer Bottle Cap Hat
Certain Types of Clothing (You Know What I’m Talking About)
Theme Parks & Midway Games of Chance
Latte & Lunch
Slacker gives Steve so much crap for his dog bed. He wants a beer bottle hat. If he knew where to find one right now, he’d buy it. He gets conned into getting apps when he just uses the phone, such a waste. He was at a memorabilia sports store and bought a jersey for $450 for his mom. He immediately regret buying it.
Steve bought a doggy bed in Vegas that was $1,200 to hold his toilet paper in his bathroom. It is a clam-shaped dog bed that came with gems. He even had to buy it a plane ticket home from Vegas so the total for this dog bed was $1,500!
Yi guys, I am having a problem with my 8 year-old son. He was bullied athis school orientation by two neighborhood kids, who continue to bother him. I called the assistant principal on Tuesdayand got nowhere. The school said they'd keep an eye on the situation. That's B.S.! My son, who used to love going to class, now despisesit. I am a single mom. If you were me what would you do .. tell my sonto fight back and stand up for himself .. or .. confront the parents ofthe bullies? I think part of the problem is that my son has grown upwithout a father figure. He may be lacking abit of toughness.
Slacker asks Steve if he thinks bullying is worse now than it was when they were kids. Steve replied it is the same. Slacker said he was mistreated but was never bullied. But thinks people would consider it bullying today. He was in the academics and the band kids but he was never pushed around and picked on. He doesn’t care who you are, any two people are going to be more alpha than the other one. People use bully too lightly because it definitely exists. But it is a catch-all. People’s feelings get hurt all the time and then use the word bullying. If a kid kicks rocks at another kid it is considered bullying now.
Steve never got bullied, but he does think people get “picked on.” Every child is going to get teased as a kid because kids are mean. Steve was a part of the stoner crowd, athletics, and academics so he got along with everyone. He said she needs to nip this in the bud now because that can lead to bullying later on in life that would be worse.
What should she do?
She needs to teach her son to stick up for himself. My single mother taught me that and it helped me a lot! I was bullied by a group of girls until it had to get physical and they left me alone. People are always going to find weaker beings to pick on because they can, until the weaker one can become strong and fend for themselves.
Jeff and his wife Katherine just had a baby. Jeff runs his business out of his home and has his clients walk through the house to get to his office. Katherine wants him to use a side door because she breast feeds and lounges in the living room with the baby. Jeff says he can't just bring clients through a side door when his business pays the bills.
Slacker asks Katherine if they would have their home if Jeff didn’t have his business and Katherine said no. Jeff replied by saying that he likes to show his clients their nice house and get them refreshments and he can’t do that if they go through a side door. Slacker says if he were doing business with a guy out of his house he’d want to go through the front door because it looks sleazy if not. Slacker thinks Katherine can breastfeed in another room or get a job and not be present while Jeff conducts business.
Steve says isn’t unsafe to have strangers with a new baby. Katherine said she is not scared of them and wants to breastfeed in her living room. Steve thinks that Jeff should be protecting the baby and his wife when they have people they don’t know coming to and from their house on a daily basis.
Whose side are you on?
I am on Jeff’s side. I think Katherine can go in another room to watch TV. during business hours and can definitely breast feed somewhere else too. It is pretty simple, especially when she doesn’t have a job…
Public shaming is become more and more common. Whether the law catches you and forces you to walk around with a sign on or a crazy jogger punches your truck for running a stop sign. There are many different ways to public shame.
Slacker says one of the only things that are acceptable for public shaming is leaving a child or an animal in the car. He says that he understands why some people do it, mainly because it could be such a hassle if your only seven feet away and you have to wake up a sleeping child. Slacker says that Steve always shames people for doing the exact same things he does! He tells a story about how he was going to run a stop sign but a jogger got in the way and he slammed on his breaks. Slacker claims the man was at a safe distance and not in harm’s way at all. He says the guy ran up to his window and started yelling at him, the jogger then ran off and screamed profanities!
Steve says that it’s a good thing that people are shaming others when it comes to leaving kids in the car. He says that if you’re not going to be a responsible parent then you deserve it! Steve says that he got his car washed and parked at the building next door, a building that clearly says no car wash parking. He says that he was drying off his car when the store owner came out and started to freak out on him!
Lil D says that he was at the doctors office when his baby hit a button on the ultrasound machine. He says that lights and everything went off! Lil D says the nurse stared at him and yelled “Maybe you shouldn’t let your baby touch things! This is a very expensive piece of equiptment!”
Friday the 13th, black cats, wearing the same jersey for your team to win, all of these are superstitions. Some of us have our own beliefs when it comes to these and others think they are totally bogus!
College football starts this weekend. A survey by the Big Ten Network reveals that 53% of football fans are superstitious and wear certain clothes or shoes to help their favorite team win. Other findings:
- 40% of fans say that looking away from the screen sometimes helps their team win
- 31% of fans scream at the TV during football games
- 62% of people watch college football games at home
- 30% of people watch college football games at a friend's house
- 8% of people watch college football games at a neighborhood bar
Superstition Might Be Practical In Some Circumstances
Here's some research which shows that, while superstitious behavior won't stop events from happening, it does have practical value to people. It won't stop bad things from happening to you - but it may stop you from feeling bad things.
Would you hop on a free flight to Aruba? I'm guessing you would. Now, what if that flight were contingent on a coin toss? If the coin comes up heads, you will be on the plane. If the coin comes up tails, someone else gets your seat. Some of you are now more reluctant to get on that plane.
Perhaps you are thinking of the most famous coin toss in music history. On February 3, 1959, a plane full of musicians crashed in Iowa. The musicians included Buddy Holly, The Big Bopper, and Ritchie Valens - the musician who popularized the song "La Bamba." Valens' presence on the plane came as the result of a coin toss. Valens and Tommy Allsup, another musician touring with the group, flipped a coin for a seat on the plane. Valens won, and died.
The incident became famous, and it's not hard to see why. There's something horrific and fascinating about a life riding on the toss of a coin. Of course, no one is struck by the amazing coincidence of a life riding on the decision to buy a ticket, to go on a musical tour, or to book a gig in Moorhead, Minnesota. All those chains of events led to the same result, but no one thinks of the mundane decisions - just of the coin toss.
A group of researchers, handing out a survey, found that this fascination isn't limited to plane crashes and coin tosses. They surveyed people about their reactions to the goring death of a very young matador, who had been substituted in at the last moment because another matador had to drop out of a fight. Unusual events that led to misfortune, the survey found, were more likely to prompt huge emotional reactions, and lots of "what if" thoughts, than normal events that led to misfortune. Partially, this is because we remember unusual events. No one remembers exactly when they booked a ticket but they do remember a coin flip. If that heads or tails leads them to disaster, they can think back on that one moment. In order to regret your past decisions, you have to remember them.
But this intense emotional response might also be a practical basis for superstitious behavior. If someone takes an unusual, or unexpected, action and it leads to disaster, they know they will regret it far more than they would if they'd just wandered into the disaster without making a memorable choice. On the other hand, if they refrain from taking the unusual action, and they miss out on some minor pleasure because they refrained, they'll probably forget the whole thing in a day or two. By being superstitious about a coin toss - or any other omen or bad luck charm - people might not be making a completely irrational decision based on irrelevant information. They might be thinking about how different scenarios will affect them emotionally, and have decided to hedge against the worst possible scenario.
Slacker says that he can’t go through a tunnel without holding his breath. He says that a random number will pop into his head when he is walking and he has to count to that number. Slacker says that if he gets to his destination then it was meant to be, if he doesn’t get there then he stops and looks around to see if something important is around him. He says that sometimes he has found money which is always a plus!
Steve is curious what would happen if Slacker didn’t hold his breath, would the tunnel collapse? He says that even when he played baseball he was never superstitious.
What is your silly superstition?
Whenever I fought competitively I wouldn’t ever go under the ropes or step on the first step. It was just bad luck!
Candy’s sister is married to a woman trapped in a man’s body. Apparently he/she has been feeling this way for a while. Candy doesn’t like the fact that he/she is just now coming out after so many years of marriage. She thinks that he/she is being incredibly selfish and that her sister is silly because she is willing to stay with him/her! Should Candy step in and say something or leave it be?
Slacker says that you fall in love with the person and personality. He says that regardless what the private parts are, you still will love the person. Slacker doesn’t understand why Candy is trying to get involved. He says that if the husband has been cross dressing for a while then her sister may be more used to it than she realizes.
Steve is confused on why Candy thinks it’s any of her business. He is curious if it makes the sister a lesbian. He likes the fact that Candy cares about her sister.
First day of school. First day of work. First date. first kiss. Life is full of firsts, but they don’t always go as planned! What was your worst first?
Colton Haynes Shamelessly Live Tweeted a Couple's First Date and It's Hilariously Awkward
As if first dates aren't awkward enough, imagine having that date put on blast by a celebrity and his 936,000 Twitter followers. If you're a woman named Tracey (spelling yet to be verified) who recently went on a date with a guy you met online, you may be living that nightmare.
Colton Haynes, of Arrow and Teen Wolf fame, was just trying to live his life and eat some dinner when his meal was interrupted by one of the most awkward first dates ever. Since everyone loves a good live tweeting event, Haynes took to social media to document the adventures.
"I am sitting next to the a couple on their 1st date who met online and it's a conversation I have to live tweet about right now. Stay tuned"
"He's currently explaining to her the amount of women he's hooked up with after the first date...it's a lot"
"O god...he's still married"
"She keeps tossing her hair...I honestly think she's into it. They r now discussing name pronunciation...I have to secretly film this"
"HE JUST CALLED HER THE WRONG NAME!!! After 30 mins of their date, he called her Terry...her name is Tracey"
"Let's just name him Dan...he looks like a Dan. I am now staying at dinner to see if his horrible lines work...why am I so invested?"
"Dan has a mullet...and a beard...2 things that could be love blinding Tracey...hurry the hell up Tracey, Jesus, the audience is waiting..."
"They r currently talkin about their current/past relationships and I'm now getting sad that I'm putting this on display...ok not anymore"
"Dan just said "There's a girl here that I call my cousin...but she's not my cousin, she's my ex girlfriend." I'm dying laughing"
"U guys...I am now sweatin laughing. I'm a terrible person but he just said he dated his second cousin once. I SWEAR ON MY LIFE HE SAID THAT"
"Can I get a moment of silence to see how's this is gonna end...................shhhhh"
"No joke, I just followed them out (without paying yet) and Tracey just peaced out!!! Tracey-1, Dan-0!!!! Note to self: Do this more often..."
Slacker said that his first days of school were always the worst, mainly because of the cloths he borrowed from his brothers. He says that he understands why Colton Haynes did what he did, because he doesn’t even pay attention to his wife when they go out! Slacker says he is much more interested in watching other people’s drama. He says that with his daughters first day of school it took multiple teachers to get her into the class, she was kicking and screaming the whole time!
Steve said that his first day of school was never a problem because he was always a rock star.
What was your worst first?
My worst first was my first kiss. I totally blew it! I thought the girl was going in for a hug so naturally I just put my head to the side and I got a cheek full of tongue… Needless to say I was very disappointed when she walked away in disgust!
I’m sure everyone has lent out something with some importance and immediately regretted it. A good friend lent out his Bentley to his friend to drive. The friend ended up getting drunk and crashing the very, very expensive car into an apartment building.
Slacker let a child borrow his guitar for a talent show and after he performed, the child destroyed the guitar on stage! The guitar was worth thousands of dollars, he was not very happy. If you start putting panties on your wall, Slacker wants credit!
Steve had a friend who let him use her bedroom to partake in some activities. When the friend came back into the room and removed his razor, she realized he had totally cut up her family’s very precious table.
Yi! My husband gets really heated when he drives and I'm normally okay with it, but ever since we've had our son, I'm afraid to let my son drive with him. He’s one of those guys that rolls down his window and will be into verbal altercations with people. I'm afraid that my son is going to get hurt. I've tried to tell him to calm down, but he doesn't get it. What should I do?
Slacker sees Steve as a massive road rage driver. So is she giving him an ultimatum, to stop driving with the son period or stop with the road rage? Some moms don’t want their husband to take their children to a football game because they just lose it; spilling beer on them, cussing, fighting with others, and that’s one that Slacker agrees with.
Steve says he just knows how to drive like everyone else should. Steve points out what if the mom doesn’t get road rage but she gets tickets here and there, can the husband say the same thing. A guy was kicking Steve’s passenger window in after some road rage and he was about to ram into his car and drive away but then he saw the son in the backseat looking terrified.
Someone wants to be just like Steve, a chick magnet! We wanted to hear from the ladies on which car they thought would be a better buy, a Porsche or a Prius. Does the Porsche automatically mean that a guy is way too into himself? Does the Prius mean a guy is super nerdy and lame? Or is it just the opposite.
Slacker says he thinks all the women would choose the Prius because he cares about the environment so he’ll be a good dad one day. Lies! You don’t want to get picked up in a Prius to go out on a date. Slacker says you can’t even valet a Prius. When he had his Audi, he would valet at places that don’t even valet! Just throw his keys to the nearest person and call it good. Now that he has a truck though, he’ll park a mile away just so he won’t be that guy.
Steve says he doesn’t even need the nice car, the chicks are already swooning. However, he has his nice Audi because he just likes the fast car; he needs a stylish “grocery getter.” Prius drivers are boring!
People will do some pretty extreme stuff for beauty! A Mexican singer Thalia rumored to have removed some of her ribs to make her waist thinner. She has been teasing her fans for years if it’s really a myth or not. She recently posted a picture of herself on her Instagram smiling next to a jar with two ribs in it. She then posted another picture saying they weren’t her actual ribs. We are still clueless to the truth! Another woman had fed her daughter tapeworm eggs to get her to lose weight before her beauty pageant. She ended up in the hospital for stomach pains and after she used the restroom, the nurse noticed a toilet bowl full of worms.
Slacker says he was at grocery store and he had seen a woman who had Nicki Minaj’s butt with a waist the same size as his own four year old. She was obviously a woman who did the corset trick to keep looking thin. Slacker does girly things like facials and is trying his hardest to get Steve to admit that he gets them too.
Steve says if he could have his rat-tail back, he would most definitely get hair extensions.
We have all come across many teachers in our life. There have been stories in the News of many teachers showing up to class drunk. One of which, wasn’t even wearing pants. She was found in an empty classroom, yikes! Another school tries to get a teacher fired for playing Beyoncé’s ‘Drunk in Love’ to students and teaching them how to grind on a chair. A teacher even tried getting a student suspended for saying, “Bless you” to another student.
Slacker says this is all in honor of everyone going back to school! He said it took about three teachers to pry his daughter off his wife on her first day of class. He thinks you most definitely have got to be drunk to deal with high school students, so he understands.
Steve says he never cried, especially not on his first day of school. The drunken lady who took a cab to her first day of class was being responsible in Steve’s eyes.
What bad teacher experience have you had?
My Spanish teacher told me I talked too much so I wasn’t allowed to talk for the rest of the week. I then proceeded to get kicked out of the class every day to the point where my desk was just waiting out in the hall for me. I enjoyed it!
Today's OPP has decided to cut something out of her life. She thinks it's for the better, but none of her friends are supporting her decision.
Yi! I've come to the realization that I've spent way too much of my life drinking and partying. I've done some things I'm not super proud of and feel bad about the fact that I used to drink so much that I would black out. I've decided to turn my life around and swear off drinking cold turkey. But the problem is that my best friends don't seem to respect my choice. They still try to get me to drink with them and accuse me of thinking I'm better than them when I turn down their offer to go out for drinks. How do I get them to respect my choice? Or do I need to go cold turkey on them too?
Slacker gives the example: if there is a group of people who are overweight and you guys go out to dinner, you tell them you are watching your calorie count, and then all of a sudden here comes the Krispy Kreme! Not being supportive is complete sabotage. Is Amanda surrounded by bad friends or does she really even have a problem he wonders.
Steve says these are your best friends; you need to stick with the peer pressure! Steve is being the good friend by trying to continue something you want to quit. By stopping drinking, she is basically silently saying that her friends all have a problem and needs to stop drinking with her.
Last week, we talked to Julie who told us she knew her husband had been cheating on her for the past four years. She wanted to pack up her things, her children and run while her husband was out of town for a business trip.
Slacker asked if she was okay. He asked her what things she took when she left. She just said her name isn’t even Julie, she was just so scared!? He asked if she said any goodbyes to people or did she just go ghost, so she wouldn’t have anyone to say bye to. She said she lost all her friends being with this man.
Steve wants to know what it feels like to run away from life. He says congratulations and happy she’s safe!
If you've ever been in a relationship, chances are you've either given or received the silent treatment at some point. The only thing that's different is how long you got it for. Slacker and Steve want to guess how long it lasted!
Slacker and Steve are like peanut butter and jelly. Aw! The silent treatment can be the most harmful thing you can do to a relationship. Slacker has a friend who had his relatives in town and his girlfriend’s relatives were coming into town for a big dinner, but around the same time, a bunch of his college friends were also coming to town. He was going to golf in the morning with his friends and he said he’d be back in time for dinner, promised! He and all the dudes got hammered, after he went to his apartment to get changed, passed out on the bed, and was woken up by the girlfriend’s sister to let him know he missed the entire dinner. Now Slacker adds that the dinner was his own rehearsal dinner! Now he wants Steve and Lil D to guess how long she went with the silent treatment. She ended up not talking to him until 30 minutes AFTER the wedding was supposed to start and after he apologized to the whole family.
Steve agrees because you should be communicating. He says he got the silent treatment for at least 3-4 days. Steve’s second guess is maximum five days tops! He’s shocked that he still married her!?
Lil D says if it’s anything longer than five days, she’s ridiculous. Does “I do” count as part of the silent treatment?
Bad Grammar by Slacker and Steve,posted Aug 20 2014 6:16PM
A middle school teacher asked her students to dress in black in order to have a funeral for bad grammar. Kids wrote their bad grammar on a piece of paper then they buried their papers. Parents were in an uproar over this!
Spell Check: The Oxford Dictionary has added the following words among others.
Adorbs (adj.): arousing great delight; cute or adorable. Amazeballs (adj.): very impressive, enjoyable, or attractive. Binge-watch (v.): watch multiple episodes of a television program in rapid succession. Bro hug (n.): a friendly embrace between two men. Clickbait (n.): (on the Internet) content whose main purpose is to attract attention and draw visitors to a particular web page. Cray (adj.): crazy, but without that time-consuming extra syllable. Concha (contraction): don't you. E-cig (n.): another term for electronic cigarette. Fandom (n.): the fans of a particular person, team, series, etc., regarded collectively as a community or subculture. Hate-watch (v.): watch (a television program usually) for the sake of the enjoyment derived from mocking or criticizing it. Hot mess (n.): a person or thing that is spectacularly unsuccessful or disordered. ICYMI (abbrev.): in case you missed it. Live-tweet (v.): post comments about (an event) on Twitter while the event is taking place. Neckbeard (n.): growth of hair on a man's neck, especially when regarded as indicative of poor grooming. Side boob (n.): the side part of a woman's breast, as exposed by a revealing item of clothing. SMH (abbrev.): shaking (or shake) my head (used to express disapproval, exasperation, etc.). Throw shade (phr.): publicly criticize or express contempt for someone. Vape (v.): inhale and exhale the vapor produced by an electronic cigarette or similar device. YOLO (abbrev.): you only live once (expressing the view that one should make the most of the present moment)
Slacker says that when he was younger he had a teacher that wanted to get rid of bad grammar early on. He says that his teacher dressed in black and had a funeral for the bad grammar! Slacker says that they even dug a hole and there is now a hole somewhere with random words on papers.
Steve says his biggest pet peeve was when people say WOOF instead of WOLF. He said his mom used to say it all of the time and it used to bother him so much.
Lil D can’t stand it when people say anyways, it’s anyway! He says no “S”! He also hates it when people say dats instead of that’s, it drives him crazy!
What are your linguistic pet-peeves?
I personally can’t stand it when someone uses WARSH. There is no “R” people!!!!!!
Kid Damage by Slacker and Steve,posted Aug 20 2014 5:16PM
Raising kids can cost a lot of money. A new study has shown that it costs at least $250,000 and that is if your kid is being good. We all know kids come in a little package but they can cause a lot of damage and end up costing you a lot more money
Costs of Children
It's no shocker that raising a child can put a strain on family finances. But seeing the total cost may leave you stunned. The average cost of raising a child born in 2013 up until age 18 for a middle-income family in the U.S. is approximately $245,340 (or $304,480, adjusted for projected inflation), according to the latest annual "Cost of Raising A Child" report from the U.S. Department of Agriculture. The estimate is 1.8 percent higher than the previous year. That equates to roughly $12,800 - $14,970 per child per year for a two-parent family with a median annual income between $61,530 and $106,540. The annual cost can vary based on factors like the child's age, the number of children in the family and the family's income and location. Housing is the top expense, accounting for $73,600 or about 30 percent of the total cost of raising a child. The next-biggest expenses are child care and education (18 percent) and food (16 percent). Transportation, health care, clothing and miscellaneous expenses were also considered. The cost of college, pregnancy or other expenses after age 18 were not factored in.
Slacker says that he wishes that this study came out seven years ago! He says that housing is for sure a factor because if he lived by himself he would live in the city in a concrete jungle; with kids, you need a house and everything. Slacker says that he bought a new computer one day and his kid was looking at it and he thought it was cute, then his kid started banging on it! He also has a story about how his daughter used sharpies and drew all over the walls thanks to the movie “Tangled.”
Steve says that all parents are suckers! He says that 18 years isn’t even the standard anymore its more like 22 years you have to keep the kids! Steve asks what do you get in return; Love? He says it doesn’t seem like a fair trade.
Julia and her husband have a rocky relationship. He is constantly going on business trips and is cheating on her; she knows this because he rubs it in her face! Julia wants to get away from him and wants to know how to go about it. Should she drain the bank account? Run away with the kids?
Slacker says that there is no spark in her voice when she talks about the relationship, it just seems empty.
Steve was thinking about a shelter she could go in meantime but it seems clear that she wants to just up and leave.
Lucky by Slacker and Steve,posted Aug 20 2014 3:10PM
You either are lucky or you’re not! Check out these lucky stories:
A cat in New York City survived a 12-story fall from an apartment building. The cat fell off his penthouse terrace then crashed onto a third-floor landing and became wedged between a skylight and a wall. The owner had to climb out a neighbor's window to rescue his kitty. The cat only suffered some scratches and a broken tooth.
Woman Wins Lotto with Wrong Ticket
A central Illinois woman played the lottery occasionally, but said she never won anything, until she was given the wrong lottery ticket. “I asked the clerk for a $1 Lotto Quick Pick ticket and when I got home I realized she had given me a Lucky Day Lotto ticket instead,” winner Tammy Mann said to staff at the Illinois Lottery Prize Center in Springfield. Mann purchased the ticket at a gas station. A few days after the drawing, Mann stopped in at another gas station to check her ticket on the self-serve scanner. The message “file a claim” appeared on the screen so she asked the clerk to tell her how much she had won. “I was so shocked when she told me, I had to sit down,” Mann said. With a combined nine children, eleven grandchildren, and two on the way, the Mann’s plan to purchase a new house with their winnings.
Slacker says he doesn’t ever need luck, because when you that good luck doesn’t matter. He says that Steve is the luckiest person on the planet. Slacker says that Steve and him were playing poker and Steve was kicked out of the game, while he was still playing Steve went over to a slot machine, put in a hundred bucks and BAM! Steve won $5,000! He also says that a different time Steve was playing poker and he had to leave from the table so he put all of his chips in. Slacker says that Steve lucked out and got so much money! They ended up being late for a meeting but lucked out because they put the money on the table to prove they were held up.
Steve says that he is only lucky when it comes to money.
Everyone has different taste, especially when it comes to the stuff they’ll eat! Some people enjoy eating fried bugs, will put mustard on their mashed potatoes, or like Slacker and Steve, eat the kernels at the bottom of the popcorn bag.
Slacker says half the people in this building don’t even know how to make popcorn without popping it. If you put water in your microwave, it makes it humid, then put the popcorn in and it makes the perfect popcorn! He eats spaghetti noodles before he even cooks them. Sour cream and Cool Ranch Dorito’s got some excitement.
Steve says he doesn’t want to do that, because he loves the un-popped kernels at the bottom! Boiled pig head parts are something Steve can actually eat. He even opens soup and just starts eating it, no heating whatsoever.
Lil D says go to a fast food restaurant and get a cheeseburger. Then go to a grocery store and buy a bag of Funyuns, combine those and it is the greatest creation on earth! His other weird obsession is to take a bite of beef jerky, throw some Cheez-Its in your mouth at the same time, perfect road trip food!
It's one of the most embarrassing things that could ever happen to you. We're talking about when that special toy of yours made a public appearance. A New York couple is angry after cops searched their home and left all of the wife’s sex toys in their 5-year-old daughter’s room. Cops were looking around the home after the dad accidentally shot his son. Officers destroyed several electronic tablets, an XBOX, stepped on a toy train set, poured out cereal and more. They also took $680 in cash and snipped cable wires. The family is suing the cops and is looking for unspecified damages.
Slacker knew a family who had a power outage in their house. They and their kids had a “meeting place” for emergencies like this. Once the dad grabbed a flashlight and went to find the rest of his family, he heard his son saying he couldn’t get his flashlight to turn on. Right after that, all the lights came back on and his dad realized what he was holding… Definitely was not a flashlight. To top that off, his wife didn’t even know about this sneaky toy until now.
Steve wants to know the name of this family Slacker speaks of.
Our OPP today comes from Erica who was actually on air with us! Here is her letter,
Yi! My boyfriend went to a friend's house for a party and got really drunk and passed out. While he was passed out his friends drew daddy parts on him and took pictures of him in suggestive poses. They sent the pictures around to other friends and then someone posted a few of them on Facebook. He is friends with co-workers on Facebook and they confronted him at work about the pictures. I am absolutely enraged with his friends! It's one thing to play a joke on a friend, but to humiliate him publicly and put his job in risk is ridiculous! I want him to press charges against his friends. He’s mad, but he’s not ready to press charges! What should happen next?! What should he do?
Slacker says this will ruin her boyfriend’s relationship with all these friends. If he were to get fired, these pictures could definitely come back to bite him. The bell has already been rung, even if you close down your Facebook, those pictures will still be there! She should take her boyfriend out and teach him how to drink.
Steve points out the fact that this mean his girlfriend has to fight battles for him. Ouch! He does say if her boyfriend goes to find a different job, and they check his Facebook, it could possibly hurt him.
Askmen.com came out with a list of ways to get someone to break up with you. Among you: let yourself go and start hanging out with attractive people. We know there are better ways than that! Be disgusting: fart on your significant other, pick your nose then rub their hair. When you two are out, always drink too much. Become overly obsessed with their friends: hang out with them when they aren’t around, call them just to “say hi.” Be mean to their parents, don’t pay for dinners, be stingy, etc!
Slacker says the girl is usually more mature and breaks it off normally. Men… Different story. He says it’s dumb if you let yourself go because then you have to hurry and do extra work to get another one. Once you break up with a girl, they will tell everyone about you! If you aren’t doing well between the sheets, many other girls will hear about it. Slacker had started an argument with an ex about generic brand salt… Uh he was easily single after that one. “Marinate in what they hate” t-shirts will be available soon.
Steve does the slow ghost. He stops doing all the special little things, she starts to notice those things, and eventually she can tell he’s not into anymore and she breaks it off for him. As an FYI, Steve does not do clingy ladies!
What have you done to get someone to break up with you?
They can be your best friend or your worst enemy! We're talking about your sibling. Woman attacks sister with spatula. Yes, a sister spat-ula. A West Virginia woman was arrested after she attacked and hit her sister in the head with a spatula. The sister spit in the other sister’s face and shoved her. The victim suffered a laceration to her scalp and had a bite mark on her finger. Mom stepped in and ended the sister spat-ula. The angry sis was charged with felony malicious wounding. Two brothers were drinking when a fight broke out, and one stabbed the other in the neck. The police were called and the victim went to the hospital with a punctured lung. Michael Baker was arrested on aggravated battery charges, according to police.
Slacker spent half of his life lying on his back hoping the spit in his brother’s mouth would suck back in and not end up on his face. He was at war majority of his childhood.
Steve knows the answer if you are curious about any of your kitchen utensils being considered felony weapons or misdemeanors!
Lil D has had hundreds of sibling fights. His brother was throwing the bachelor party but it was in the middle of nowhere. Not exactly what Lil D wanted for his night out so being drunk they got into a fist fight in the bathroom. The wedding was three days later and in all the pictures his brother had a black eye. Karma!
What is the biggest fight you’ve had with your siblings?
When my brother and I would get into fights, he was so much bigger than me so I would throw a fan at him to secure my safety.
Today’s OPP is torn in two. Megan’s husband wants her to get breast implants. Her immediate reaction was no way! After her husband was calling her selfish and now that she has had time to think about it, she does want to make her husband happy.
Slacker asks Megan if she often does what he asks, if he is controlling. If Slacker’s wife asked him to get hair implants, he wouldn’t do it because he’s perfectly comfortable! He might throw on a wig if it would spice up the bedroom though. It feels weird for someone who loves you to ask you to change, for strictly his pleasure. A major surgery where a significant other has to take care of you for six weeks, that’s asking a bit much.
Steve asks if she doesn’t do this, if her husband will wonder outside the marriage. Why can’t this couple just have an open marriage like everyone else!
A man offered a drunken stranded woman a ride home and when he stopped for gas, she stole his wallet and ran off. An 82-year-old Good Samaritan thought she was helping some lost tourists. A few hours later she realized they stole her wallet from her car and $1,000 was missing from her bank account. A Colorado couple noticed a child sitting in the back of a car with all the windows rolled up so they called the authorities. Once the mother came outside and realized they had reported her, she became enraged! She hit the man in his face, then got into her car and ran over the woman. She crushed her leg and now she may never be able to walk again.
Slacker had a friend who asked him to come have a few beers with the dudes (so he would look cool) so Slacker of course said he would do it, but they ended up closing down the entire bar for him. As soon as he walked in he received a 25 page long script and a microphone. If anyone needs a life hammer, ask Slacker!
Steve says this is exactly why you shouldn’t do good things! He says the enraged mother is actually kind of cute, in a white trashy way, nice!
Have you ever tried to do a good deed only for it to go bad?
Spy by Slacker and Steve,posted Aug 15 2014 5:20PM
Recently a man was busted for bugging his own mother's phone! We have all done a little bit of spying, whether it’s using a tracking device, a conveniently placed baby monitor or even a hidden camera!
Man Bugs Mom
A Nebraska man was fined $500 for bugging his 90-year-old mom’s phone.
The 60-year-old man was busted after his sister found a recording device in the basement of their mother’s home and called police. The man admitted to bugging his mom’s phone and didn’t think it was illegal. At least one of the calls he listened to was between his mother and sister, with whom he doesn't get along. He was originally charged with a felony but he pleaded no contest to disturbing the peace and was fined the $500.
Slacker says that Steve having a telescope isn’t very discrete, and wants to know why he didn’t use binoculars. He says that the studio they work in is bugged, because people know things that only him and Steve are supposed to know!
Steve said that he had a telescope to spy on his attractive neighbor! He says that he used to work with a guy that also owned a bar and the bar owner asked his employee to watch the bar. Steve continues and talks about how the owner would use his camera to make sure the employee wouldn’t steal, in the end she did.
Lil D talks about a story of during the cold war a couple bought a picture that was bugged! They had it in their house for 11 years before they figured it out!
Yi Slacker & Steve,
My daughter is 4 and she's in the puppy stage. My husband's cousin has a pit-bull that just had a litter and my daughter has fallen in love with them. She has one specific puppy she likes the most and she keeps asking if she can bring him home. My husband has already told her she can have the dog but I don't think a pit-bull is a good dog for a little girl. It's cute now but it's gonna grow up and we all know they are aggressive dogs that can turn any second. I don't want my daughter to end up mauled or dead. I told her the puppy had to stay with its mommy but we could get her a different puppy. My husband says I'm crazy and thinks it will be a good dog for her. How do I convince my family that bringing that dog home is like leaving a loaded gun in the living room?
Slacker says that he won’t even let his kid go river rafting without him at his side, because he doesn’t trust the situation. He says he would like to put his kid in the best possible scenario. Slacker says that with his kids being a little older he wouldn’t mind getting a pit-bull but getting the breed when they are babies is a hard decision. He says that the majority of pit-bulls don’t do bad things. Slacker says that if Shelby is that much afraid of the breed then it wouldn’t be a good idea because you need to be the alpha!
Steve says that they could get another breed but this one is a free dog and they know what kind of dogs the parents were and what not. He says that the big problem with this situation is the fact that Shelby’s husband already promised the dog to their daughter.
What advice do you have for Shelby?
Pitbulls are wonderful dogs. Yes sometimes there are bad news stories about them but think about it this way, they used to be nanny dogs! Enought said...
It's time for another 'Anyone Listening Who'! This week, Slacker thinks more of you have been kicked out of church. Steve thinks more of you have a claim to fame. Lil D thinks at least one of you have lost your prosthetic limb at an awkward moment.
Woman Gets Kicked Out of Church
A woman who filmed at least two sexually explicit videos inside a Catholic church in Hoersching, Austria, was apprehended by police after one porn viewer recognized the church and a second recognized her breasts. One of the videos in question shows the woman—who performs under the name Babsi—"opening her top and caressing her breasts" while holding a Bible and a rosary, without ever showing her face, the Austrian Times reports. A churchgoer who saw the video recognized the interior of the building, then notified a priest, and after a clip was played on local news, a second viewer—apparently a big fan—identified Babsi's boobs and notified the authorities. Babsi, 24, was arrested for offending religious feeling and desecration of a church, and confessed. Local Catholics debated whether the church needed to be reconsecrated, the Times reports, but ultimately decided not to, "as the woman's sins had not been enough to drive out God."
Guinness Record for Stretched Earlobes
A man in Hawaii has set the world record of having the biggest stretched ear lobes. Guinness World Record holder Kala Kaiwi, whose lobes are over four inches in diameter, claims to fit his fist through them, the Daily Star reported. Kaiwi, who works as a tattoo artist and runs the Sin City Body Modification and Tattoo shop in Hilo, Hawaii, has claimed the Guinness World Record for the largest non-surgically made stretch earlobes and also has his tongue split like a snake, which he reportedly did himself using dental floss. The man also has silicone horns implanted into his head, which are matched by flesh tunnels in his nostrils, lower lip and bolt holes on his forehead with spikes screwed in, in addition to tattooed eyebrows and a tattooed eyeball.
Pilot Looses an Arm
A pilot flying a Flybe plane with 47 passengers aboard learned an important lesson on a flight to Northern Ireland: always make sure your arm is attached before landing. An unnamed 46-year-old pilot was landing a Dash 8 plane at Belfast City Airport in gusty weather conditions when his lower left arm prosethetic became detached from its yoke clamp and he lost control, according to recent report by the Air Accidents Investigation Branch. The senior captain who was described in the report as one of Flybe's "most experienced and trusted pilots" was manually flying the plane when a flare maneuver caused his arm to detach, the BBC reports. There wasn't enough time, he determined, to have the co-pilot take control. Instead the captain used his right hand to grab the yoke and safely land the aircraft – albeit with a bounce after touchdown.
Slacker says that when he was younger his buddy was asked to leave his church due to smoking pot! He says how awkward would it have been for the guy to confess that he was watching the adult video to catch the girl that filmed the video. Slacker says you can throw a coffee saucer through the guys stretched earlobes!
Steve says that his claim to fame was that on the first season ever of shark week that the shark week crew came by his radio station he was working on and filmed him and his partners talking about sharks! He says it was more of an almost claim to fame because they didn’t use any of it.
A 14-year-old Texas boy was caught living in a 24-hour Wal Mart for two days, but he went unnoticed by constantly changing clothes and hiding in two secret forts. He lived behind stacks of products, and survived off stolen food from the store. He even cut a hole in the wall behind the drink aisle. The teen also made a make-shift bed, wore a diaper to prevent multiple trips to the bathroom, and even stole a fish from the store to keep as a pet.
Slacker never ran away from home! He didn’t have the guts to do it. He wonders why the universal sign of a runaway is the stick and bandanna. He remembers thinking that if he was going to run away he couldn’t fit everything in the bandanna. They both wonder what this kids forts were made of. Slacker thinks this kid was in the stock room of Wal Mart because that's how he didn't get caught, or so they think.
Steve said he tried to pack a suitcase and go, but never actually did. He lived on a farm growing up and when he was 5 years old he got upset about the breakfast so he packed up his blanket in a bag. His mom helped him pack his bag for him to “run away” and even packed some toys in his bag! She took the fun out of it. He wanted her to be hurt that he was going to be gone, so he decided to stay home. Cute kid.
Lil D chimed in and asked if it was stealing the fish if it was still in the store? Slacker said absolutely it was stolen and Steve said no way, it was still in the store.
Have you ever ran away from home? Where did you go?
Some people are great parents and others not so much! A woman in Kentucky instigated a fight between her daughter and a McDonald’s employee. You can hear her screaming, “ Whoop her” to her daughter. The mother and daughter left the restaurant after the altercation, but were never found or arrested.
Another mother in Florida let her 7-year-old son walk to a park 15 minutes away from their house! As the boy was passing an elementary school someone asked him where his mom was. He was playing on the playground at the park as cops came and took him home. His mother was arrested for child abuse and bonded out for $4,000. She is fighting the charge.
Slacker and Steve agree thinks it’s not very weird to let a 7 year old walk to a park alone. However, Slacker thinks the McDonalds incident is crazy. He knew parents that actively pushed their kids to get in fights. He tells his son that if someone hits him to knock the other kid out obviously.
Steve says parents can be so stupid sometimes. He knew parents where they would make their kids go be bullies to the other kids. It all starts with the parenting and the kids learn it from them!
What did your parents do that was not parent-like?
I'm a junior in college and this was the first year I didn't make it home to see my parents. They are coming out to see me and want to meet my boyfriend while they're here. I've been dating him for about 6 months and I've purposely not told my parents a lot about him. The reason is because his family is from Saudi Arabia and he's Muslim. My dad fought in Desert Storm and doesn't give people from that part of the world a fair chance. I know he will automatically hate my boyfriend and do everything he can to get me to break up with him. My dad thinks that everyone from the Middle East is a terrorist or funding a terrorist. I know my boyfriend is proud of his heritage but I'm thinking about asking him to lie so my dad won't be upset. What should I do?
Slacker says they usually don’t really do controversial OPP’s, but this one is tough. She definitely shouldn’t lie and should probably just hide him entirely. A soldier’s daughter is always his light and shining spawn so Hailey is in a rough spot. Slacker says prejudging people is awful, and that if this guy was a protestant kid from Ohio it would still be hard to introduce the two. He feels awkward talking about this right now. He doesn’t have any dispositions with anyone. He would hope his kids would break him of his prejudices. He thinks it is impossible to change a military man, but his daughter could be the catalyst. Hopefully this meet and greet could bring them together.
Steve says why even bring the two together? Her father was trained to hate and kill the people in the Middle East from the beginning. Steve hates prejudice people. He says Slacker touched on something Slacker
What should Hailey do?
This is really tough! I wouldn’t know what to do if I was Hailey, but ultimately I would introduce him for who he really is. Don’t lie. That will make it worse. Maybe this will open her dad’s eyes that he is a good man and is good for his daughter.
Rebekah and Colin have been dating for some time now, but every time they get in an argument or Rebekah needs to vent she goes to her mother for support. Colin doesn't like this because he thinks her parents will never like him. Rebekah says her mom is her best friend and gives her great advice.
Slacker asks Colin if he thinks the mom has a skewed opinion of him and he answered yes because he can tell. Rebekah says that it is her mom and he vents to his best friends about her and they think different of her too. Slacker asked Rebekah if she thinks what she is saying to her mom is bad and makes Colin look bad. She claims she doesn’t say a lot of bad things about him or else she wouldn’t be with him. He makes a good point by saying she is venting to someone who is super protective over her. She claims her mother literally is her best friend and she tells her everything.
Steve says it would be different if it was a friend because they’re just a sound board, not a mother who raised you your whole life. Steve and Slacker both agree that if you’re going to choose someone to vent to they have to choose a confidant that will be on neutral ground, just a person to listen to the complaints.
Whose side are you on?
I am on Rebekah’s side because Colin would already know if her mother didn’t like him. I tell my mom a lot too and she doesn’t judge my boyfriend through my eyes. She judges him through her own.
Getting a ticket can be the worst thing ever. A woman recently got out of a ticket for running a red light by choking! A Michigan police officer pulled over the woman and as he walked up to the car she was choking! He performed the Heimlich maneuver and saved her from choking.
Slacker says that Steve has used the “I’m on the radio” excuse to get out of a ticket. He says that the woman may have been faking it because it’s the best excuse ever! Slacker says that he would totally pull the choking card.
Steve claims that he was driving 75mph in a 45mph and when he got pulled over he told the officer that he was the host of a radio show and he was looking for Slacker and was late. He says that a car pulled up behind them Steve talks about another time he was pulled over he said he was an engineer and claimed that all of the stations were off air and they were losing revenue as they speak. He says the officer just let him go.
Lil D says that his mom is his excuse. He says that he was driving in front of his mother with a headlight out and turned into an apartment complex. Lil D says that a cop pulled into the complex and was harassing him about the headlights. He says that about two minutes into the cop talking to him his mother pulls up behind them and explains calmly to the officer that she will take care of it when she gets home and basically sweet talked the officer.
What excuse have you used to get out of a ticket?
I told a cop I was coming back from Martial Arts, turned out he was really into the whole cage fighting thing and decided to pick my brain. I think in the end he forgot about the ticket and sent me on my way.
Recently a woman was arrested for trying to stop a plane her husband was on from takeoff. She thought he was cheating on her! Sometimes women can go a little crazy. Whether it’s because they think their man is cheating or something one of their girlfriends did to them.
Stop That Plane!
A Canadian woman was arrested when she tried to stop the plane her husband was on because she thought he was cheating on her. The woman jumped the security fence at the Halifax Stanfield International Airport. She was caught immediately after jumping the fence. The woman likely won’t be charged and was taken to the hospital to be evaluated. Turns out, the woman’s husband wasn’t on the plane his wife wanted to stop.
Woman on Woman Crime
A Washington woman attacked another woman at a barbecue because she thought her shorts were too short. The 25-year-old woman confronted the other woman, telling her that her shorts were too short. Several minutes later she attacked the other woman knocking her to the ground. The woman suffered broken facial bones and bleeding in the left eye. The other woman was arrested for felony assault.
Slacker says that he is pretty sure that Steve, during a show, was talking about a crazy girlfriend one time. He says that he has never had anyone not like him to the point of trying to sabotage his car.
Steve said that when he was at the tire shop and they ran his tires through a metal detector for and they found tons of nails in it! He said that the owner of the store asked him if he went through a bad breakup lately. Steve put two and two together and realized his ex was putting nails behind his tires everywhere he was going!
Rachael wants to put her son into sports, problem is, and he has no passion or desire to do so. Her son is constantly reading books or playing video games and she says that he needs to be rough housed because it will be good for him. Another reason Rachael wants to put her son into sports is because of the potential alone time she will get when he is at practice.
Slacker says you shouldn’t force anyone to do anything. He thinks you should let her son be the smart kid and potentially cure Ebola! Slacker says that it’s selfish to put him into sports so you can have alone time. Slacker says that he was forced to do band but soon after quit because it wasn’t his idea.
Steve says that she is right about people who play sports and are part of a team end up being more productive and successful. He says that the kids won’t do anything unless you force them to!
Guys will go to extreme lengths to impress a woman. Lies about having a certain car, house or even how much they can lift! Here is a list of the top 8 things men lie about!
How Much They Can Bench
How Much Money They Make
High School Athletic Achievements
What He Says He Shoot
How Many Drinks they’ve had
What They Eat
How Many Chicks they’ve Had Sex With (For a detailed description CLICK HERE)
Slacker asks at one point would telling women that you’re in the mafia ever worked? He says that his wife doesn’t even know what his salary is; he just figured she knows that he’s ok because when she orders sushi he doesn’t freak out. Slacker told a girl when he was younger that he could hang on the monkey bars upsidedown and do a backflip off of them. He says that a guy challenged him to do so, he tried and ended up breaking one of his teeth! Slacker says the girl walked off with the guy that challenged him.
Steve says that he never tells women how much he can bench because he doesn’t even know! He says that men are constantly lying with the amount of money they make. Steve is curious on what is the point of telling a woman about your high school achievements.
What outrageous lie has someone told you? How were they ousted in their lie?
A mom in Texas was kicked out of a restaurant recently for opting to change her baby's diaper at the table. Miranda Sowers, who's a mother of three kids, felt she had no choice but to "quickly and quietly" change her baby on the seat next to her when she found there was no changing table in the Brother's Pizza Express restaurant. Donny Lala, the not-so-sympathetic pizza joint manager, defended his decision to ask Miranda and her kids to leave, saying, "As soon as you start opening the diaper, people start complaining about the smell of the diaper. Last thing I want is a customer throwing up."
Slacker understands that these things happen, but he questions if any customer had even complained or the manager is getting way ahead of himself. He says she was at least changing her baby down on the seat; she was trying to be discreet. Either have a changing table or put up a huge sign that warns the mom’s with newborns that there isn’t one! Slacker is team mom all the way! He does see how it could be gross, but what if that really is the only option left.
Steve doesn’t feel bad for you parents because you brought it upon yourselves! He says Donny reserves the right as the manager to kick her out for that reason, its health code. He says she had a huge van so why couldn’t she do everyone a favor and change the baby in the car. He thinks it’s disgusting to be throwing fecal matter all over the restaurant, people are eating!
Do you think it was inappropriate of her to change the baby in the restaurant? Would you have done it?
Tough decision… Gross smell but children are customers too!
Miracle by Slacker and Steve,posted Aug 12 2014 6:01PM
Miracles happen every day. An Indonesian girl Raudhatul Jannah was swept away in a tsunami in 2004, after she couldn’t be found, she was pronounced dead. A decade later and she was reunited with her family! A small single engine plane lost all power when trying to land. The plane ended up crashing into a fence that boarded a street and not one person was hurt. A Florida pastor was shot in the head during a road rage incident; he cut off another driver but wasn’t expecting violence. When police arrived, he was alert enough to give them a description of the shooter.
Slacker says his own kids would perish; they can barely handle the bathtub! He really thinks the child being found a decade later is a miracle because she lived, but mainly because she was found later by a family member! Slacker does believe miracles happen. “Mericuls!”
Steve says when you get shot in the skull; it will travel around your skull and exit, which makes it not a miracle, but a scientific fact. Steve has a perfectly reasonable scientific explanation as to why all these stories have happened, none being a miracle.
We all know that guy's drag their feet on a lot of things, but today's OPP is saying no! Seth and his wife just had their second baby and she is ready for number three! Seth forgot how hard it was to have both a newborn baby and a pregnant wife. He’s not against a third child, just not thrilled about the idea. He wants to tell his wife without causing any drama.
Slacker says you have to do it or you have to get a divorce, only option. He does say if you have all babies right away, you knock out all the newborn baby throw up, smelly diapers, and messes to clean up in about three years. You can do that rather then spread all that difficult stuff up within the next six years or so.
Steve thinks she will get her way in the end. Steve’s theory that women settle with a man to have kids is starting to look up…
Lil D’s expecting his second baby as well, when his first child is barely one-year-old. He is trying to talk to his wife about putting some space in-between baby two and baby number three, but he knows it’s ultimately her decision.
Neighbors by Slacker and Steve,posted Aug 12 2014 4:06PM
Sometimes you get good ones and sometimes you get bad ones. We're talking neighbors! Did they pound on the floor 24/7? Did they throw things over the fence into your yard? Did they set your house on fire? A California woman sprayed a 7-year-old boy in the face with poisonous weed killer. Cops aren’t sure what her reasoning was, but she had been involved in other incidents before. A man from Massachusetts was arrested for doing yard work in the nude. A family even had to take their infant to mall parking lots to get a nap in because their neighbor wouldn’t stop stopping her feet... Yikes!
Slacker talked about a story of a man smoking a cigarette on his joint balcony. When the neighbor asked him to not smoke because he could smell it, the guy refused, so the neighbor went back inside and came out with his BB gun and shot the neighbor three times in the face. What! Slacker’s previous neighbor had noticed what time he was waking up, which let me remind you was at 3:30am! “I noticed you don’t get up at 3 in the morning anymore.” Creepy! Slacker now has only one neighbor who he says is great.
Steve doesn’t really have the crazy neighbor problem. Living on a farm must be nice!
Spite by Slacker and Steve,posted Aug 11 2014 5:03PM
A Burger King customer was having a rough day and was ready to splurge in some greasy food. As he was waiting in the long line, a young boy behind him kept screaming and yelling at his mom, “I want a pie!” He asked the mother to calm her child and she started yelling at him. He then bought every single pie, totaling 23, at that Burger King just to spite the spoiled child.
Slacker says kids don’t understand yet, they are the most selfless people on the planet. Slacker has had relations completely out of spite. Before he was on radio, another guy on the radio started talking about Slackers ex-girlfriend; he said he slept with the ex, which wasn’t true. Then a night out at the club, Slacker met the radio guy’s girlfriend, and had to do it! It eventually got back to the radio guy, which was his goal.
Steve says everyone should be spiting on kids! That’s how they will learn, plus… It’s fun!
Divorce is usually not a fun process. Today's OPP needs help figuring out what to do in a divorce...that's not even hers!
Yi! Two of my best friends from high school are divorcing. It's ugly. They are telling all of their friends they can only be friends with one of them. It's heartbreaking because now I must choose sides. Each of them did something bad to the other so this is not an easy choice. Have any of your listeners ever been forced to choose sides in a breakup? Who do I choose?
Slacker asks, “What if I truly want to be friends with both of them?” When Slacker went through his divorce, he gave his ex the “hip” part of town because he knew he wouldn’t be finding his next lady anywhere near there. He never made his friends choose a side, but he’s now wondering if she may have. He did however; have to tell his friends to not talk about her, to him.
Steve has done the social list when he was going through a split.
There have been a few news stories lately that have one thing in common…Craigslist! A Georgia mom used Craigslist to find her 9-year-old son a ride to Florida. The mom and unknown man discussed sharing the expenses via text message, but once the man learned the age of the young boy, he immediately called the cops. The officers arrested the mother at her apartment and charged her with contributing to the delinquency of a minor.
Slacker said he bought Lego’s for his child on Craigslist and had to go inside the stranger’s home, which was weird for him, considering the stranger locked the door behind them! He once put a bunch of old junk in the back of his truck and put an ad out saying it was ‘free while it lasts!’ Cars were screeching up in minutes! Which also shows how badly Craigslist can go, Slacker says you could so easily put an evil neighbor’s address on the website, and it’s all downhill from there.
Steve used Craigslist for the first time today, and thinks it could possibly be helpful. Steve’s one Craigslist tip is make sure you know what the acronyms stand for.
The best stories always happened to you when you were either drunk or a kid.
In my car driving in the wrong lane and the sheriff pulls up next to me after a mini car chase and the sheriff realizes that he got into a car chase with the same person last month! After having citizens help and get the driver out of the car, I was then put into the back of the cop car…. Which one am I? Drunk or a kid?
The cops show up at my house and I show up at my door, I had to go back inside for something and the cops waited at the door for me. I returned with a toy gun, which happened to be a very realistic gun and the cops drew their weapons and dragged me out of the house and disarmed me… Which one am I? Drunk or a kid?
Slacker was saying at first the driving story was maybe a drunk driver, but after being convinced by Steve he guessed a kid and was right. He guessed that the second story was a kid because there is no way a drunk person would get a toy gun to show the cops, he ended up being wrong because it was a 56 year old man!
Steve said that the first story there is no way it’s a drunk driver, the reason being because of the citizens that helped stop the vehicle, he guessed kid and was right! He was on Slackers side with this story as well, he was saying that no matter how drunk you are you wouldn’t go back into your house to get a toy gun!
Yi! My boyfriend and I met at a club six months ago and we've always enjoyed going out – both separately and together. But he has decided to focus more on his career and stop going out so much and he's asked me to do the same. He says that he'd rather not date a total "party girl" if he's in that mode, but that he really wants us to stay together. I don't think it's fair of him to keep me from going out with my girls, but I like that he's at least not saying he wants to break up. What should I do?
Slacker is assuming that she is 20 something years old. He says that he did the opposite of what this guy did, he told his ex-wife to go out and party. Slacker says that he remembers a time when he was going to clubs three times a week and was still excited for every time, now it’s just loud music where he can’t stand going into. He says that it’s all about prioritizing because he and Steve used to play poker all of the time but he realized that his kids and family came first.
Steve is curious about how much does she actually like him, enough to give up partying? He says that there is a possibility that the boyfriend is afraid of what his coworkers might think. Steve also mentions that this guy could just be insecure. He says that the guy should maybe compromise and go out a little bit with her.
Time for another 'Anyone Listening Who'! This week, Slacker thinks more of you have an amazing adoption story. Steve thinks more of you have an epic 911 story. Lil D thinks more of you have a spectacular hot tub story.
A woman in Brazil went in search of her long-lost mother and found out she has unknowingly married her own brother. The 39-year-old woman and 37-year-old man have been together for seven years and have a six-year-old daughter together. The couple spent their lives trying to find their respective mothers, who were both called Maria, and had both abandoned their children when they were still babies. After a long search she found out this week that her mom and her husband’s mom is the same woman. Despite the news, the two plan to stay together .... only death will separate them.
A Florida man who was pulled over for speeding tried to get out of the ticket by calling 911 to report a fake murder. The cop who pulled the man over was about to check on the “murder” call when he was told the man in the car made the emergency call. The man was given a $209 for speeding, and was also charged with a third-degree felony for misusing 911.
A cat at a Sarasota, FL animal rescue somehow managed to dial 911 when nobody was looking.
Zeke the cat lives in one of the office. Staff there say that on Monday, when the office's human resident left for lunch, Zeke dialed 911 on the office phone. Sarasota County dispatch got no response when they answered, so they called back and spoke to a volunteer at the front desk, who had no idea who placed the call. Turns out, Zeke sprawled across the phone, with the handset off the hook. Staffers say Zeke has a reputation for walking on laptops and other electrical devices.
Slacker says that every week he has believed that he will win and this week he is a little nervous. He doesn’t think Steve should be in charge of the decisions for epic 911 calls.
Steve says that he gets to be the decision maker about what is considered an epic story. He says he wants a story about a fire starting and a dog calling 911 and the fire department shows. He says that he would have to cut ties if he found out about he was with his sister.
Lil D says he read a reddit article he read about a woman who called 911 to signal to the police she was in trouble. He says that the at least the Brazilian couple is half siblings so it’s not that bad. Lil D says that it’s going to be rough whenever they go in public.
We all love our pets, they are like family! Some of us are even willing to do anything for them. Like spend tons of money on their birthday parties, hotel rooms, and manicures!
$995 Space flights for pet remains
A company in Houston will be sending the remains of pets into space. Celestis Inc already sends human remains into space, and starting this fall, they will offer the service for the remains of cats and dogs. The cost will be about the same as for human remains-- starting at about $995.
Londoner Karen Chamberlain recently spent $7,500 on her bulldog's '100th' birthday party. She spent $1,500 on a party hall, $250 on Lola's dress and $150 on her tiara. Karen tells the Daily Mail, ''I invited all our dog-mad friends. I wanted it to be a very glamorous evening. The dress code was quite strict - I wanted all the ladies and gents to be dressed in their finest gear and their dogs were to wear fancy dress. We had one dog dressed up as Prince Charming, and others were dyed especially for the occasion. We considered it Lola's 100th birthday because bulldogs generally do not live as long as some breeds. Every year equals 10 dog years. Lola really enjoyed her big day. She loves a fuss being made of her, and it obviously did her some good.'' The dogs ate a 10-tier cupcake tower.
Slacker says that he read a study that says people talk to their dogs 36 minutes a day, he says he doesn’t even do that with his wife! He says that with his dog mojo he never pampered him! Slacker says that he may give the dog a treat or two but never anything out of the ordinary. He says that dogs don’t want to be in space, if you want him to be somewhere he wants to be just throw the ashes at another dogs butt! Slacker said the only thing that the dog wanted at the party would be the cupcakes.
Steve says that there is already enough things floating in space, and now we have dead pets? He says that dogs don’t care about what they eat or what they are wearing! Steve is upset because dogs have a better bathroom set up than he does!
Let’s face it; sometimes when men think they are romantic they ultimately fail! Here’s a list of some of the things men think are romantic but aren’t.
Guys, when it comes to romantic gestures, it's always better to go with your gut and what you know your girl likes rather than what you think is romantic based on your friends' suggestions and pop culture. The fact is, what you see in movies and what your friends told you in 6th grade probably aren't the things that make your girlfriend's heart pitter-patter the way you hope.
Here are some of the most common things guys think are super romantic, but really aren't:
• Cheesy heart-shaped jewelry: There can be some beautiful heart-shaped jewelry, but what every man needs to remember is just because something is in the shape of a heart doesn't automatically make it romantic. If it's a replica of the antique heart locket that her grandmother always wore – that's romantic! If it holds no special meaning but you are getting it simply because it's a heart and she's your girl ... not so much!
• Teddy bears: The only time this is romantic is if you win it for her at the boardwalk for a dollar. Other than that, your adult girlfriend probably doesn't want a stuffed animal as a romantic gift. If she really loves stuffed animals, that's a different story, but if the only other stuffed animals she owns is her favorite bear she had from childhood, she probably doesn't want any others.
• Fighting over you: Getting in a fist fight with a guy who got handsy at a bar is not hot, despite what movies tell you. Handling the situation like an adult is super sexy and romantic, however.
• Cooking dinner when you can't cook and making her suffer through something gross: If you want to do a romantic dinner but you can't cook, order out from her favorite restaurant and put everything in nice plates with candles. That's romantic. Trying to choke down raw filet mignon is not.
• Tickle fights: You know who hates being tickled? People who are really ticklish! Just because she is laughing doesn't mean she is enjoying herself. It's probably the exact opposite. Again, don't believe everything you see in the movies.
Slacker says he never thought of these as being romantic, except cooking because that can end up being nice! He said that a girlfriend cooked for him once and she cooked up everything that he despised! Slacker says that he excused himself from the table multiple times that night. He also said he has bought a girl a heart shaped promise ring. He says that being tickled is one of the most miserable things ever! Slacker doesn’t understand why you would want to have a tickle fight.
Yi! My stepbrother is 18. I'm 19. He lived out of state when my mom and his dad got together two years ago. He moved here six months ago and now, we’ve fallen in love. Our parents don't know about our relationship. We have no idea what to do. How should we handle this? Is our relationship wrong?
Slacker says that it’s not ok! He says that if they grew up with each other it would definitely be taboo, but since they met when they were older it’s not too big of a deal. Slacker says what if they break up? He says that it would be really weird for Thanksgiving dinners.
Steve says that half siblings isn’t blood so it’s not that crazy. He says he is at a loss of words because it’s such a tricky situation.
Steve was at a gas station the other day and witnessed a drunken father driving his two daughters! The man was so intoxicated he could barely walk! Steve debated on whether or not to call the authorities but ultimately didn’t…
Slacker says that the easiest answer would have been to call the cops. He says that we need to think about the whole situation! Slacker says that you could be questioned for child services and by the police and everything, such big thing! He says that when he hears this story he wants to go with everyone else’s reaction and say call the cops but he says that knowing Steve he probably wanted to avoid entanglement.
Steve is confused why everyone is blaming him for a potential accident. He says no one is looking at the actual driver! Steve said that this was nothing new to the family; it seemed to have happened all the time with them. He says that there could have been a confrontation with the man if he saw him calling someone.
Did he do the right thing, or should he have stepped up?
I personally would have anonymously called the cops and ratted him out. I know it sounds bad because of all the consequences that come with it but I couldn’t handle it if something happened to them and I could have stopped it.
A woman agreed to wear a hidden camera as she walked around her city. Men called out at her, entered her personal space, and even purred at her as she simply walked on the sidewalk. Former Miss America finalist, Jen Corey talks about being physically violated on the Washington, D.C., metro last year. Do you think women deal with this every day?
Slacker says he’s never seen harassment to women in real life, only in movies. He hangs out with men who don’t do this. He doesn’t think you’re ever “asking for it,” but did this particular woman dress in a way to provoke attention. Slacker does think however, you can dress however you want. Maybe some women take whistles as a compliment thinking they are looking good for the day. This wasn’t the easiest topic to discuss for Slacker.
Steve says it is actually sad how males are, he sometimes hates his gender. He has definitely seen men whistle at women. You can’t stop men from looking at you, whether you are dressed provocatively or not.
Yi, my boyfriend and I recently got into a huge fight because of my massage therapist. My boyfriend says there is no reason that another man should be touching me the way he does. I had a bad car accident and my therapist is the only one, who truly knows my body and how to correct it. He gave me his personal number so I could book appointments specifically with him and that made my boyfriend mad. He says what I'm doing is wrong because of how much I enjoy the massages and look forward to seeing my therapist. Now, I feel sort of guilty. Am I cheating? I know I would be jealous if my man had a hot massage therapist working on him. What should I do?
Slacker says if you wouldn’t want your mate to do it, why do you expect your mate to like you doing it? He says he doesn’t like the way Heather words this. The therapist handing out a personal number is already crossing a few lines. When Slacker was getting massages, he says the ‘bigger’ women were way better, but he wouldn’t want his wife to go see a hot therapist. Slacker is anti-therapist.
Steve says she’s not enjoying the massage; she enjoys the relief after the car accident. Should she get a woman therapist? Or stop getting massages? Steve says if you have a good client, you want to keep them so giving out a personal number is no biggie.
Punishments by Slacker and Steve,posted Aug 5 2014 3:09PM
Cindy recently sold her daughter's Katy Perry concert tickets because she didn't like her behavior, calling her a 'spoiled brat.' The tickets sold in less than five minutes. A family from Texas had been told their daughter wrote on her desk. She was sent to the principal's office and lost recess to clean her desk, but the teacher also forced her to sit on the floor every day for 22 days.
Slacker says certain punishments in your life are so epic, you will always remember them. Punishing as a parent, you have to take away something they truly want. He says Steve is the one who now cares most about a clean car because of the punishment from his mom so Slacker wonders if the punishment was actually really amazing. Slacker doesn’t have a punishment story because he feared authority. Right!
Steve’s punishment story that he won’t ever forget was when his mom wanted him to wash the car before taking his driver license’s test, but he didn’t. His mom made him wait an entire week to take his test for ignoring her. He then flipped her ‘the bird’ so he added another week without a license. Steve believes it’s not a crime if you don’t get caught.
What’s the worst punishment you’ve ever got?
Let’s just say, I’ll never forget the taste of soap.
Melee by Slacker and Steve,posted Aug 4 2014 4:55PM
A brawl broke out involving 300 people at a New Jersey wedding reception. Two off duty cops who were working as security said the fight quickly grew to 80 people who were shoving and screaming at each other. Cops called for backup but the crowd grew to 300 people before help arrived. Cops from three other departments responded to the fight to help calm things down. It took another 45 minutes to clear everyone out because people refused to leave the area. Cops didn’t say how the fight started.
Slacker says the open bar is to blame! New Jersey is the capital of melees, because a house party broke out into a brawl which ended in two people being shot. Slacker caused a melee at a birthday party, but luckily for him, he stole all the taps from the kegs.
Steve said he witnessed a melee once that involved girls, guys, children, everyone! It then moved outside and got even bigger. Steve said he blocked a girl from hitting another girl, a dude from afar saw him, ran after him, and threw him into the melee! Hang out with the girls, stay away from the melee.
My son is 18 and getting ready for college. He is a very attractive boy and women hit on him all the time. It doesn't matter if they are girls his own age or women closer to my age. We can be out to eat and the 30-something waitress will hit on him. He will come into my work and the women at my office swoon over him. The thing is, he's really good at flirting back with them and he only seems to be interested in older women. I'm worried that he's going to get to college and get himself into trouble. It's not healthy for a boy his age to be with a woman that much older than him. How do I get my son to date girls his own age?
Slacker thinks the mom is sort of metaling but also kind of has the right because of the women’s ages. He will learn some lessons before his fellow peers, so that’s a plus side. If you’re a cougar, you need to understand that your boy toy has a mom the same age. Slacker wants to know if there are any rules for being a cougar. How weird would it be to bring home a 40-something year old for Thanksgiving dinner.
Steve wants the mom to just be proud of her son! He says she needs to tell her friends to not hit on her son in front of her. He says you can’t help who you fall for. The best advice they heard was to not prohibit him from dating older women or he will try harder, let him be curious and decide!
How does this mom get her son to date girls his own age?
Woman pulls gun on Comcast serviceman. A New Mexico woman was arrested for pulling a gun on a Comcast worker because she was upset about a fee. The serviceman left the home because the woman refused to pay but she followed him to his truck. She grabbed one of his tool bags and ran back into her home. When the serviceman went to retrieve his bag the woman pulled out a gun and pointed it at him. The man left the scene and called the cops. They showed up a short time later and arrested the woman. She was charged with aggravated assault with a deadly weapon.
Slacker says he had a friend who put up audio / video stuff in Michael Jackson’s home. He was creeping around and found a gigantic closet full of red shirts and black pants. He said his bathroom had a mirror from the floor to the ceiling with scuff marks all over it from MJ dancing. Slacker had a service guy working on his phone and started talking to him about a diary he had found in his junk drawer. Guilty! A pizza guy shouldn’t ask to use Slacker’s bathroom, boundaries!
Steve had a service shenanigan with a plumber. He had left his house while the plumber was there but forgot something so he had to go back. When he walked back inside, the plumber obviously didn’t hear him because Steve found him lying on his bed.
What is the craziest customer service situation you've had to deal with?
Working in a restaurant, I deal with crazy people every day. I once had to chase a table out to their car because they left without paying. I didn’t catch them but they did accidently leave their cell phone on the table, ha!
Time for another anyone listening who! This week, Slacker thinks more of you have been involved in a brawl over a board game. Steve thinks more of you have gotten into an altercation with a celebrity. Lil D thinks one of you will be willing to take a pregnancy test to find out if you’re pregnant on the air.
Slacker says there is not going to be one single girl that’s going to call and take a pregnancy test. Slacker says he recalls when Russell Crow threw Girl Scout Cookies up into the air and had a public freak out. Slacker recalls when Brandon Marshal tried to steal his sunglasses and wouldn’t give them back. He thinks his own topic is going to win because every person gets heated over a game. He has been punched in the face because of the game Uno. He holds onto his draw 4 cards until someone has one card left. That’s dirty.
Steve wonders how long it takes for a pregnancy test, and it varies. He has faith Lil D’s topic is going to happen.
He thinks his own topic is going to win because it can be either physical or verbal.
Lil D thoroughly believes a woman is out that is late and has a pregnancy test ready to go. He wants the woman to call in and everyone find out together if she is or isn’t. He got into an altercation with a running back because he cut Lil D in line.
Who do you agree with?
I think Slacker is going to win because every single human being in America has gotten frustrated or freaked out during a board game. At least I have. Does that make me a psycho? I guess we’ll find out…