She got married and you’ll never believe what she did to some of her closest friends and family. Lindsey joined us live on the air today, but here is the OPP letter she sent us:
Yi! I got married a few months ago. I got the meanest email from a couple who r.s.v.p.'d to our wedding but didn't show up. No reason, no excuse, no apology note, and no gift. So I sent them a bill. I sent them what it cost us for their two seats....$175. They knew about our financial situation. Did I have the right to send them a bill? Is it okay to bill wedding guests for no-shows?
Slacker, having been married twice before, shares her sentiments about how expensive caterers can be. However, both Slacker and Steve believe she is fighting rude with rude (RSVPing yes and not showing is rude, and so is sending the no-shows a bill for their seats) saying what she did was cool but they weren't sure if it was really the right way to approach the situation (or maybe this will be the future of dealing with wedding no-shows).
Since neither of us is married, it's hard to knowledgeably weigh in on this subject but both of us interns would not do this ourselves. Fighting rude with rude is an interesting and bold stance and these guests not apologizing or anything was very rude, but with it only being two guests not showing it seems a little harsh to bill them.
What would you do to your no-show wedding guests? Do you have any advice for Lindsey?
I am a Certified Bridal Consultant and Event Designer, Planner, Coordinator and Manager and heard the "Should I Bill Them" debate on your show today. Although the guests violated numerous rules of Wedding Ettique, the bride should have taken the high road and not have billed them. A simple phone call after the Wedding / Honeymoon to say that they were expecting the guest, yet noticed they were a no-show and were concerned - would have been perfectly appropos and would have gotten the Bride's point across in a polite way. The bride never mentioned how she & the groom were related to the couple, so it sounds like that may have been their first mistake - by inviting an acquaintance and not a family member, relative, or close friend. As far as the two meals that the bride paid for that were never consumed, it would have been perfectly acceptable to ask the caterer to package up the guest's meals for them (or their family) to take home. If the caterer would have given the bride any trouble about packaging up the meals, she coud have asked for a deduction in her bill - which would have solved the issue on the spot.
Reputable caterers always plan for a slight overage of food - just in case a server drops a tray, or the chef overcooks a meal. So, when in doubt and budget is tight, it is always better to err on the side of caution when calling in your final number of guests. Also, if the couple is over budget, it's best to pare down the menu so the couple can enjoy their special day without the upset of a guest no-show.
Hope that helps!
I had this happen. Consider it a lesson. Don't invite them to anything else. Move on.