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OPP: Seperate Bank Accounts

Yi!
Yi! I just bought a super soft set of sheets online that were 1200 thread count for close to $200. I know that's expensive but I figured we are in bed so much it seems reasonable to spend that kind of money to be extra comfy. My husband LOVES them. Then I told him the price and he yelled at me and said I had no concept of the value of money and shouldn't be allowed to spend OUR money. He set up a new bank account and is having his work paychecks deposited there and then auto-transferring enough to our joint account to cover bills coming from there plus money for groceries and fun. The rest he is in control of.
I think this is crazy. I don't work and now I am getting an allowance. I understand the sheets were expensive but we definitely can afford it. These are the first sheets I've purchased since we got married 3 years ago so if these last 3 more years, it's like $70 a year on a luxury where we spend 8 hours a day. I think it's crazy to get mad over that but even crazier to move our money into his own account!
Janissa
Slacker asked how do you decide what’s important? He said that the first mistake was telling her how to spend THEIR money. He thinks they should’ve compromised on the issue and distinguish between the wants and needs of their lifestyle. Slacker thinks sheets are an important thing. And she bought them for both of them to enjoy.

Steve is very confused on the situation. But if they’re married then they do have to budget. She actually made a good purchase on these sheets.He thinks allowances are childish.

What advice can you give Janissa?

I think her husband is being cheap. And sheets are a luxury that they can spend a little cash on to be comfortable.

Sincerely,
Intern Nikki

(Photo courtesy freedigitalphotos.net)
 


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03/03/2014 4:19PM
OPP: Seperate Bank Accounts
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03/03/2014 5:12PM
Trust Issues compromise with her if you want to keep her
Hi, I am completely against putting your significant other on an allowance and here is why. For one its childish to say that I can spend whatever I want but my wife cant. 2 marriage is about trust and compromise, and if I cant trust my wife with our money and feel that she cant spend our money wisely then the issue is deeper than $200 dollars. My wife and I have an unspoken understanding that we will talk to each other before making huge purchases but I wouldn't sweat it if she spent any amount on something that she felt we needed. My sister in law is on an "allowance" and she is miserable and I would never wish that on my wife. The thought of my wife having to ask me to give her money to pay bills or go grocery shopping, or even pamper herself or the kids makes me sick. I think a man who puts his supposed partner through that kind of misery is a terrible childish control freak. Understand if you put that kind of strain on your relationship treating your PARTNER like a CHILD, that it wont end well because she will one day find a MAN that will give her the money to buy whatever she wants at her discretion and it probably wont be you. So compromise with her if you want to keep her.
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