Her son is in the middle of a feud with another boy, but each claims the other is the bully. How does she find out if her son is the victim or the instigator?
Yi! Over the weekend my 11 year old son slashed the bike tires of a neighbor boy. When he was caught he told me he did it because the neighbor kid bullies him. The neighbors said that their son told them that my son bullies him. At this point it's obvious I'm paying for some new bike tires but I have no idea what to do about the accusation that my son is a bully. How can a parent prove that their son is the victim when it's he said he said?
Slacker said he would be prepared to move if his kid were in this situation. He said that even though he expects Noah will someday be the bully, he hopes he will be the bullied because he will turn out better (you can't be a bully in the real world). Slacker says he fit the bully mold (popular, good-looking, etc.) growing up but he did not often wield this power over anyone.
I was always the awkward/nerdy girl, so I never really became the bullying type. However, I faced enough of those popular kids with that false sense of entitlement to know that one of these kids is lying OR they are unknowingly simultaneously bullying each other (in which case I'm not sure it would be called bullying so much as just fighting). Kids lie! They'll do anything to not get in trouble for doing something bad. I think it will take a sit down with both boys and both sets of parents to set things straight.