Today Sara joined us live on the air but here is the e-mail she sent us:
Yi! One of my close friends is getting married next month. The only problem is I am unsure if I should attend the wedding. I do not feel comfortable supporting her decision to get married because she has cheated on her fiancé several times. Once last summer while we were all on a girls weekend, then she had a 6-week affair during an out of town work training, and just last weekend attempted to cheat a 3rd time while on a business trip but thankfully the man turned her down. What makes it even more awkward is that she does not talk about it, and acts as if it isn't happening. Last summer we were staying with 2 other girls in a beach house when she brought the guy home, so we all witnessed the affair. The next day on the beach she pulled out her bride magazine and was asking our opinion as if nothing happened. She does not cheat because she does not love her fiancé or is unsatisfied; she cheats because she is totally insecure and is in constant need of a male's attention. Should I tell her I think the marriage is a bad idea, or do I lie and say I can't get off work for the wedding? Either way if I don't attend, our other 4 close friends will be suspicious as to why I am absent. Any advice will help! Sara
If Steve was in Sara’s position, he would be along the line of her friends. He would show up, drink the booze, eat the food and just deal with it. Slacker knows much of us don’t have much of a moral fiber and honestly, he would probably do the same thing Steve mentioned, but if you feel so strongly about something and can’t pretend like everything is okay, what do you do?
If I was Sara, I would probably do the same thing…See if I can get people to agree with me and form this force field where I won’t lose any friends in the process if I go through with the situation. However, if it’s going to create too much drama and you still love your friend, then I don’t think it’s worth going through. In a sense, I would say just butt out. It’s not your problem, but if I was getting cheated on and his friends knew and didn’t tell him to tell me, I would be pretty upset to know that I went through with a marriage that could have been stopped. This is a tough situation. I want to tell Sara not to go, but I can’t…