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OPP: Daughter's Boyfriend on Vacation


Today’s OPP comes from Tina…
They’re going on a family vacation…but they may have to bring one person from outside the family just to make the trip bearable.
Yi guys! My daughter has been dating a boy for awhile now. They are in that first love stage of texting and being on the phone with each other non-stop. From the minute they wake up to God knows what time at night they have to be in constant contact. We are planning a beach vacation right before our girls go back to school and I mentioned to my husband that we should just bring our daughter’s boyfriend with us. She’ll be miserable the entire trip if he’s not around and I don’t want her to ruin vacation for the rest of us. My husband says that she’s just being a teenager and she needs to learn to be apart from her boyfriend. I just don’t think he realizes exactly how moody she gets. What should we do? Bring the boyfriend or risk ruining or entire vacation?
Steve thinks they must take the boyfriend. He had an instance when he was a sophomore in high school and the family took a vacation. His sister had a boyfriend at the time…and he didn’t go with them! She was impossible to cheer up, she whined the whole time and she was absolutely miserable. He doesn’t see any reason to put up with anyone ruining a family trip. Take him, even if it does condone some unapproved behavior from the daughter and the boyfriend. As long as it’s just while they are on vacation…It might be bad parenting, but Steve still thinks they should give in and do it. For sure! He had a best friend that use to take Steve on his family’s vacation, so he saw firsthand how the dynamic changes when the kids are happy and hanging out with people they are familiar with.
Slacker is on the completely opposite end of the spectrum on this one. No way should they take the boyfriend. Slacker was lucky that his family even brought every member that lived in the house when they went on vacation, let alone anyone outside the family! For real, you’re allowed to take someone of the opposite sex? Even before your 21? His parents would never be terrorized by the kids behaving badly. His folks would just make them sit in the car or stay in the room the whole time if they pouted about anything! Slacker thinks Tina sucks as a parent for even considering this option.

Should they bring the boyfriend or risk ruining the entire vacation?
I remember missing my friends at the beginning of most of my trips as a kid. I always managed to come out of my shell and make new friends and then pout about leaving…Seems like a harmless pattern and a lesson for the kids if they don’t have familiar surroundings. If Tina does it this time, she’ll have to do it every time. EVERY TIME! Besides, what if they get into an argument? What if she meets another boy? I met some new girls. Not every time, but I would not want to have to deal with that dynamic. Socialize the child. Ignore the fact that they don’t want to be with you. Life is similar to childhood. Fortunately, childhood has a much larger parachute.

Peace, Love and Good Happiness Stuff! - Ray the Intern

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07/16/2012 4:36PM
OPP: Daughter's Boyfriend on Vacation
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