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Slacker & Steve's Blog



I Love You Fails

Yi!

We found an article on reddit.com that explains what not to say when someone uses those three little words.
20 Things You Should Never Say When Someone Says 'I Love You'
From an Ask Reddit thread...
1. "Take it back' was said the other day to my friend's face.
2. "'Wait...why?' I'm sad to say that I'm the owner of this response."
3. "And I love spending time with you!"
4. "My ex said 'thank you' and that was it. Shame ensued. There were a few moments of silence which I broke by saying 'juuuuuust kiddinggggggg' in a shaky, trying-not-to-cry voice and then we broke up a few days later."
5. "'Thank you' is bad, but the worst has to be 'thank you?' stated as a question, dragged out in an awkward way, so their response is actually more like, 'Why are you saying that? What am I supposed to say back? Am I supposed to be happy? Well, that's not how I actually feel and now you ruined this relationship.'"
6. "I love me, too!"
7. "I'm sorry."
8. "'Oh....no.' The tone of her voice sounded more disappointed than anything else. Sad day for me."
9. "Yeah, you're not too bad yourself."
10. "Awesome sauce."
11. "Via text: 'K' In person: 'I love you too, like a brother/sister.' On the phone: '-dial tone-' Webcam: 'Your session has ended.'"
12. "In ninth grade, some girl said 'I love you' in front of a group of 8-10 of us. The guy replied, 'You want fries with that?' Devastating."
13. "That's... sweet."
14. "'I wish I loved you."
15. "Woah, I thought this was just physical."
16. "But I don't love you."
17. "Laughing. One of my close friends told me he loved me and always had. I laughed. I
thought he was joking. He wasn't... He looked so crushed."
18. "I know how you feel; I love someone, too."
19. "Aww, crap."
20. "'The feeling is mutual.' I was 13, she was 12, it lasted a month and now we're both gay. At least something was mutual."

Slacker was forced by friends to say, "I love you" to his wife at a party. Slacker's entire proposal and marriage was scripted by his friends he says.

Steve thinks that if you do respond with, "I love you" your face will still blow it. When people say "I love you" to Steve he pats them on the head and says "thank you." He thinks saying those three words are concreate.

What are your "I love you" fails and responses?

Whenever I receive an unexpected and unwanted "I love you" I always respond with "Olive Juice" no matter works.

Signed,
Intern Madison
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Pathetic Proposals

Yi!
A 22 year old student at a China university burned his school down after proposing to girlfriend using fireworks. After his girlfriend was a no show he decided to light the fireworks off anyway hoping she would see the giant display. The fireworks first let the grass then progressed to the building. The administration is trying to find a way to punish him. The man did eventually propose to his girlfriend but her parents told her to stay away from him because "he can't even ask me to marry him without causing a massive hoo-ha." 25 year old Ryan Jarvis from Vermont proposed to his girlfriend then went immediately to jail after stealing the 1-carat white gold ring from Zales jewelry store. The police found the stolen ring after a picture of it was posted on Facebook. His fiancé changed her mind and told all women to "run; don't walk away from the loser." Shane popped the question to his girlfriend on a boat. How romantic right? It was all romantic until he dropped the ring over board. The ring was not recovered. A man proposed to his girlfriend at a popular haunted house called the 13th Floor surrounded by zombies. Nick Showman dragged his girlfriend Steph Knolland who is extremely terrified of clowns into the haunted mansions and popped the question after a zombie delivered the engagement ring on a foam finger. Steph said yes.

Slacker hates over the top marriage proposals especially the guy who saved money since he was 12 years old to make his engagement a spectacular event.

Steve thinks that the guy who burnt down his school on accident by proposing to his girlfriend with fireworks is romantic and her parents should let the two get married.

What are your pathetic proposal stories?

Signed,
Intern Madison
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Topics : Human Interest
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Locations : Vermont
People : Nick ShowmanRyan JarvisSteph Knolland


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OPP: Fell Off the Wagon

Yi!

Julie and her husband have been together for over three years and they have a child together. Before Julie and her husband got married her husband had a bad drug addiction. Julie gave him an ultimatum, "It's me or the drugs." She told him if he ingested one more drug in his body she will leave him and until recently he has not. Julie heard from her friend that both of their husbands had smoked some weed together. Julie is confused on if she should stay with him and roll the dice again and hope this will not escalate or stick to her original plan and leave him.

Slacker is confused on what she should do but he does say, "It's just pot. It's from the earth and is natural." Slacker thinks either she stays with her husband because they have a child together or she leaves him because her child does not deserve a drug addict as a parent. If she threatens him again with leaving Slacker thinks he would not get clean for himself but for her and their child.

Steve says, "Addicts have to change for themselves and never for anyone else." Steve thinks her husband has had a good run and is still having a good run at staying mostly drug free. He thinks that Julie should not have to babysit her husband however and that he wants to give her husband the benefit of the doubt but smoking pot can make him slip back into his drug habit. Steve thinks Julie has to follow through with her original plan.

Should Julie stay or leave?

I think Julie should wait and see. Not make any immediate decisions on staying or leaving. Smoking a little bit of pot can either be huge and can make a person relapse or it can be just something that is not that big of a deal. I would wait and monitor him for at least three monts and see how he progressing.

Signed,
Intern Madison
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GMD: BFF Dating Duel

Yi!

Holly and Brandi have been best friends since kindergarten. Holly just recently broke up with her boyfriend of eight months and Brandi decided she liked him and wants to start dating him. Holly is upset because she believes in the long standing "bro-code" which is the rule to never date your friend's exes. Brandi does not understand why she is mad because Holly is the one who broke up with him. Neither one can see eye to eye and their friendship is in a standstill.

Slacker asked Holly, "Would you really throw away years of friendship over a situation like this?" Holly said she is unsure. Slacker says the answer to solving this issue is by Holly deciding who is more important to her. He was shocked by the way these "best friends" were talking to each other. Slacker says, "One man's trash is another man's treasure."

Steve believes in the bro code concepts. "Bros before hoes is the way to go" Steve says. Steve thinks that Holy's ex- boyfriend is public property now so he is fair game to any woman that is interested in him.

Whose side are you on?

I am on Holly's side. If my best friend of 10 years started dating my ex I would be livid because from a young age you are taught the bro code. Ex-boyfriends are always off limits. Its disrespectful to start dating your friend's ex.

Signed,
Intern Madison
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Gross Parenting Things

Yi!
Lil' D's daughter was not feeling so well this morning and had to puke. Instead of letting her puke all over the floor Lil' D did the natural thing as a parent and put out his hands. Here is a list we found that talks all about gross parenting things!
The Weirdest, Creepiest and Grossest Things Parents Do
Everything changes when you have a baby, and that includes your threshold for creepy, gross and weird behaviors. Not from other people, mind you, but from yourself!
Parents do some weird stuff that suddenly becomes completely acceptable because they have a child. Here are the weirdest, creepiest and grossest things parents do:
• Saving baby teeth and locks of hair: Not normal if you don't have kids, but if you do, it somehow becomes a sentimental, sweet act!
• Calling your partner "mom" or "dad" when the kids aren't around: It's one of those things you swear you will never do before you have kids and then before you know it, you never say your spouse's name anymore ... even in public!
• Sniffing a baby's butt to check their diaper: It's gross, but somehow isn't if it's your own kid. It is to everyone else, though!
• Taking photos of your kid's first potty training success: Parents, if you want to do this, fine – just please, keep it off of social media.
• Picking your kid's nose: GROSSSSS!
• Eating your kid's leftover food: Even after they have mashed it with their grubby hands and drooled all over it.
• Using the word "potty" when you are out with your adult friends: It's the ladies room, not the potty.
• Spit cleaning your child's face: It grossed you out when your mom did it to you – don't subject your children to this torture!

Slacker tells Steve thank God you are not a parent. Slacker's kid had started to eat something and mashed it up in their mouth but then spit it up so he caught it and then ate the regurgitated food. Slacker says it's a must to put your nose up to diapers to smell if they did their business.

Steve says this exactly why he does not have kids. Steve does not know why parents' use spit to clean their kid's faces when they could get water and clean it because there is water everywhere. Diapers that turn blue to let parents know when their kid has had a mess, Steve said that is like the Coors Light cans that have the mountains turn blue when the beer is cold.

Lil'D says, his daughter's puke went 90 miles an hour out of her face. He says he only caught a handful and it went everywhere, all over him, all over her, all over the bed, and all over the floor. The worst part Lil D says that she only had milk so it smelled horrendous. He told Steve he would probably be a "big daddy" parent.

What are your gross parenting stories?

Signed,
Intern Madison
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Viva la CHOAD

Yi!

Indiana veteran, wife battle homeowners association over Old Glory
An elderly veteran and his wife say there's "absolutely no way" the flagpole outside their Indiana home is coming down, despite threats from a homeowners association — and a local prosecutor intends to back them in court if necessary. The couple was first told in early September that the freestanding patriotic display wasn't welcome since it wasn't mounted to the home. Actress Sarah Jessica Parker has come under fire from a homeowners association after she staged a photoshoot for her shoe line on the steps of the house that featured in her hit TV show "Sex and The City". The property on Perry Street in Manhattan is frequently visited by fans, who wish to see where Parker's character Carrie Bradshaw lived, and the owners have erected signs in a bid to keep them off the steps. Parker returned to the building earlier this month to stage a photoshoot for her footwear brand, placing the shoes on the steps and posting pictures of them on her Instagram. However, the stunt has infuriated the local homeowners association, who claim the actress failed to obtain proper permission to gain access to the steps. If you own a luxurious condo and want to make some easy money, you can rent out your unit for a weekend via popular sites like Airbnb, Craigslist and Vacation Rentals By Owner. Just don't let your Homeowners Association find out or you could be writing them an even bigger check. That's what happened to Thomas Stevens, who in July paid The Mark Condominium Association more than $106,000 after a Superior Court judge ruled that he continually violated the opulent downtown building's regulations by renting out his 19th floor unit on a nightly and weekend basis, something Stevens says he only did once

Slacker says HOA only comes into play is when they want to play God. He thinks Sarah Jessica Parker should always be welcome to have a photoshoot on the steps of her Sex and the City apartment. Slacker has caught an HOA member trying to take pictures of his trash can. He knows people who have gotten fined 1,500 dollars for now fine cutting their grass.

Steve says that he has had to deal with the HOA twice. Once when his tree in the front yard was dead and then again for his grass being dead as well. Steve claims that he knows all the tips and tricks on how to avoid the HOA.

What are your HOA horror stories?

Signed,
Intern Madison
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Locations : Indiana
People : Sarah Jessica ParkerThomas Stevens


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OPP: Dying of Cancer

Yi!

Teddy has stage four cancer and is expected not to live a long life as he had hoped for. Teddy has not told his girlfriend or family members that he has cancer. He does not want to be treated differently or "babied." Now he is thinking that when they do find out that he has cancer they will be so mad and hate him forever. He is stuck in a sticky situation of to tell or not to tell?

Slacker does not know what to think. He says when it comes down to it he would tell his family and friends because it would be hard for him to not share that life changing information. Slacker says, "There is no right answer to this situation." Slacker thinks that if he did not tell his family and friend's that he is dying from cancer they would be absolutely devastated.

Steve says he understands why Teddy is not telling anyone because when Teddy was sharing his story he and Slacker both started speaking in a "hush" tone. Steve does not think Teddy is being selfish and if he were in the same position he would do the same think. Steve thinks we should all respect how people want to continuing living before they pass away.

What do you think Teddy should do? Tell or not tell?

I think Teddy should inform his loved ones but explain he does not want to be treated differently. It is important to give the loved ones time to love him extra before he passes away.

Signed,
Intern Madison
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First Date Limo

Yi!

This man is about to go on a first date and he wants to pick his date up in a limo. They are going on a wine tasting tour so they will be drinking a substantial amount so he did not want to drive so he said, "Why not take a limo?" One friend says, "You're going to look like an idiot!" and another friend says, "That's the coolest thing ever!"
Slacker says, "Do limos even exist anymore?" He said if he were going on a date he would be picking his date up in his truck and if he and his date did get drunk he would find a way to get home safely.

Steve agrees with Slacker by saying, "No one takes a limo anymore!"

What do you think? Is that cool or uncool?

I think that is creepy. I would think it would be way too much to do on a first date.

Signed,
Intern Madison
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Topics : Hospitality_Recreation


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DIY Disasters

Yi!

Do it yourself projects can be fun for everyone. They give you a chance to show off your craft skills and creativity until they go horribly wrong. Many do it yourself projects can become a nightmare and cost you tons in damage.

Slacker says that he tried to install his own washer and dryer because he thought paying a professional to do it was ridiculous. Slacker flooded the house and cost him up to 2,000 dollars repairing the damage.

Steve says do it yourself projects are stupid and you should always just hire a professional do the work you need to be done.

What are your do it yourself disasters?

I once tried to paint my bedroom walls by myself. I am only 4'10 and a half feet tall so I was standing on a ladder trying to reach the corners of the wall and I fell off the ladder and got paint everywhere, all over my floor and all over me.

Signed,
Intern Madison
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Conniving B**** Tricks

Yi!

Everyone knows a conniving b**** and the tricks they use to get under your skin! Slacker's wife knows a woman who says, "It's nice to meet you" every time they meet. Mind you, they've met more than five times; the girl knows who she is. Every girl does this or has encountered it many times!

Slacker doesn't think any girls will actually admit to the catty things they do. The person Slacker knows this girl will always say, nice to meet you. No matter if she's met you 1,000 times, had drinks with you, whatever! She says it every single time. Slacker thinks it's her b**** way of saying you're irrelevant to me, I don't even remember you. His wife is "the wife of Slacker on the radio" and she is also smokin' hot so he KNOWS she remembers her. A friend at work invited everyone to a 'thing' after work and she said "it's totally casual" so they all went straight from work but when they got there, it was the farthest thing from casual.

Steve thinks the ladies who are really good at conniving tricks want to brag about it. Steve says there is the Queen B in a group who is attractive and hangs out with girls who are not as pretty as her so she always looks best.

Do you know a conniving b**** or do you have any tricks of your own?

I don't like when people show off or want me to get something out of them. Whenever my co-workers get a great tip or are reading their phones and yell, "YES!" at something exciting, I know they are hoping for me to ask what's going on so they can talk about themselves and I never will. I'll look at them so they know I heard them get excited and walk away.

Intern Alli!

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Idiot

Yi!

We all do dumb things! A family in Brazil ate a poisonous puffer fish. The family of 11 are all now hospitalized in critical condition. They were paralyzed just a few minutes after one bite! They couldn't feel their tongue, then their face, arms and legs! A friend gave them the fish and it looked so tasty they fried it and now are praying for a miracle. Or the guy who text his probation officer to ask her if she had "any weed?" They raided his house after that and found cocaine, he's going back to jail for that one. Or there were two underage drunk boys who went to the police station to get their friend out who was arrested earlier that night for underage drinking. They definitely met back up with their friend, after being arrested too, that is.

Slacker says when he was a kid and your battery dies in your car, you could refill your batteries with water. His dad's car battery dies, he popped the hood up but he can't see so he takes his lighter to get some light. It blew up all over his face! To this day, you can still see little burn marks.

Steve knew a girl where her gas cap was frozen when she was trying to get gas so she took a lighter to heat up the ice!? The guy next to her getting gas had to stop her. Steve bought a new car and couldn't figure out how to get to the brights on so he went all the way back to have them fix it, and the guy said, you just push this button in… Duh.

What have you done that makes you an idiot?

Intern Alli!

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OPP: Buying a House Together

Yi!

There are a lot of things to consider before moving in with someone! The boyfriend of today's OPP wants to move in together but she has one big concern.

Yi! My boyfriend comes from a real estate family. Everybody is in real estate except him. We've been dating close to a year now and we're crazy about each other. We practically spend every day together and love doing anything together. We've been talking about moving in together for a while now and that's where I get a bit shaky. I love the idea of living with him and am completely ready to go for it. But his idea is to just move into a house together--mortgage and all from the get go. I personally thought that it would be great to find a place to rent together before buying a house. I just feel nervous taking such a big financial step before testing out the waters of us living under the same roof first. I'm not completely against the idea. I actually get a bit excited when I think about a home together. I just think I'd like to live with him for a bit before we make such a big jump. I feel like I'm being nudged into a financial situation I'm still trying to get comfortable with. I tried to explain my side and he doesn't understand my concern. Either that or he's worried about my commitment. I love him and am not saying I wouldn't buy a home with him--I just need time to adjust to things. If we lived together for a few months before buying a home, I'd be 100% comfortable. Maybe I'm just being childish with how I'm approaching this. He'd be the first guy I live with and I just want to make sure I'm doing the right thing. Do you think he's right and I should adjust to it?
Candice

Slacker says we live in a time where renting an apartment is not worth it. If you have decent credit, you should just buy a house! If his family is in real estate, they definitely know what they're doing so she should do it. Plus, she can always leave a house just like she could leave an apartment if something went wrong. Slacker bought a house with who is now his ex-wife and when his marriage went down in flames, he walked to a county clerk, she signed the papers, and she was off the mortgage simply! Slacker would rather buy a house with Steve than move into another apartment!?

Steve is too selfish to ever move in with someone! Rent can be more expensive than a mortgage nowadays. It makes financial sense for them to buy a house but he understands why she would be nervous, this is her first time living with her boy.

Lil D asked when Slacker's son is getting his first car, is he going to buy him a Lamborghini? Why go 0 to 100mph? It's a difference between a one year agreement and a 30 year agreement!

What's your advice for Candice?

I'm with Slacker on this one. I think it's awesome that Candice's dude wants to buy a home with her! He obviously cares about her and a home is cozy, safer, and all YOURS. Apartments suck! My lease to my apartment is up at the end of this month and I will never go back! Do it Candice! If it doesn't work out, you can move out.

Intern Alli!

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Riding the Lie

Yi!

A woman from Alaska faked being deaf for NINE whole months to keep her boyfriend! Tina said an attractive man approached her in a bar and she got so panicked, she signed to him that she was deaf. He turned around to his friends and said, "This deaf chick is hot!" So she decided to ride it out. Tina said it took a lot of effort to not respond to the noises around her when she was with him like, "If a dog barks, you have to be really careful not to look or anything." "You can't hear a car honking at you if you're crossing the street." Chris, the boyfriend, finally found out it was a lie after nine months of dating.

Slacker doesn't have a lie he had to ride. He says honesty is the best policy so you don't have to remember all your lies! He doesn't have to think, did I tell that person I was in a band or not? It's too much work! Slacker says that Steve rides the lie that he is a lady's man player! The truth has been revealed; Steve goes home and watches Pawn Stars.

Steve's manta is exactly this, "Ride the lie!" Honesty is not the best policy. Steve says he is totally a lady killer! Every Friday and Saturday! When Steve was young in junior high, a girl just moved to their town from San Diego. His family was about to take a trip to San Diego, so he told her and she was so excited, said that he needs to go to the Charger game. He said he totally knew the Charger's so she asked if he would get her an autograph and he said yes! Obviously he didn't know them and couldn't get the signature. He ended up signing a piece of notebook paper himself and gave it to her. She totally fell for it up until Steve's friend snitched him out.

Lil D and his brother were fighting one day when they were younger and his brother lifted their step-moms lampshade above his head. Mind you, his step-mom treasured these glass lampshades. The lamp shattered and there was glass everywhere so they picked up ever y single last piece and moved them behind the couch. They told their stepmom that they through laundry onto the couch, it scared the dog, and when he jumped up, HE broke the lamp.

Have you ever had to ride a lie like that?

My mom still doesn't know that when I stopped going to college, I never actually got my associates like I might have said I did...

Intern Alli!

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Topics : Human Interest
Locations : AlaskaSan Diego


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Halloween Political Correctness

Yi!

Elementary schools are canceling their Halloween parties "due to concerns that they exclude children whose families don't celebrate the holiday." Teachers can teach about the holiday but cannot "celebrate" it. Halloween can be scary for kids with food allergies too. The Teal Pumpkin Project encourages people to place a teal-painted pumpkin outside their door if they're offering non-foods treats, such as small toys, crayons, or stickers.

Slacker says when he was younger; literally no one had any food allergies! Slacker's son is Captain America this year and he got a list from his school with all the things he can't wear so basically it looks like he is just wearing a leotard now. Back in the day, Slacker would be able to just go trick-o-treating by himself then come home when he's done, but now parents HAVE to go with. Slacker pretty much sums up with we should end Halloween for good! It has not evolved in a good way.

Steve says vandalism and destroying things made Halloween fun for him! Pranks, tricks, setting things on fire, steal kid's candy! Steve says these teal-pumpkins means he has to worry and keep track of other people's allergy child?! How about whoever is the parent, they do that for their own kids! Steve says you can't drink anymore when you take your kids trick-o-treating.

Are we taking political correctness too far when celebrating holidays? Or is there more we could be doing?

This gets under my skin a little bit! To give away toys seems a lot more expensive and you know kids will be picky when they see what toys you're putting into their bags vs. their friend's bag. You're the parent, you're the boss! Take your children's bag when you get home and take the candy out that they can't have, it's that simple. It's a once a year thing, have fun!

Intern Alli!

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Animal Encounters


Yi!

Lions, tigers, and bears...oh my!!! There have been a ton of stories in the news about animals getting into places they shouldn't be. A man shot and killed a 400lb bear that broke into his home. He got into a bag of dog food, left, and then came back later that night. He tried to scare him off but when he came after him, he shot the bear. A 200lb deer burst through a furniture store. It hurtled furniture, did some damage, and left a trail of blood before it exited out back! A month old bear cub walked into a Rite Aid and cops caught it with a shopping cart. The cub will have to go to a zoo because it cannot go back to the wild after interacting with humans. A house in Canada was invested with over 100 snakes!

Slacker's wife saw a bunch of raccoons the other day. He thinks they're one of the cutest little animals with their face but they are some mean turd-bucket animals! Slacker doesn't do anything that has to do with snakes, ever. Speaking of bats, Slacker says he hates them because they just stick to anything! At least birds fly away, but a bat once landed on Slackers rear-view mirror!

Steve knows his animal sizes and weights! He watches an animal TV show so…duh. If you wake up with a rattlesnake next to you, Steve says sing to it!! It works and also, that's why you don't camp!

What's your crazy animal encounter?

When I was in middle school, my friend and I would always sleep outside on her trampoline. One morning I woke up pretty early because I felt something near my feet. When I looked down, there were THREE small raccoons walking along the end of the trampoline, on the sheets that were covering my feet! I woke up my friend and ran the fastest I have in my life to get inside.

Intern Alli!

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OPP: Boyfriend Going to Jail

Yi!

We're all forced to make relationship decisions at some point in our life. Stay with someone or break things off? Say yes and spend the rest of your life together or move on? Today's OPP is facing a relationship crossroads and she needs your help deciding what to do.

Erica was on air with us today! She said her boyfriend had a DUI at beginning of the relationship and was in jail for seven months, she waited for him, did the long distance thing. He got another DUI for about the 4th or 5th time, so she is concerned if she should wait this time around or go on with her life? She said he now wants to marry her even though that was never an option before. He promises when he's out, he will quit drinking, he'll take care of her and their life.

Yi! My bf and I have been together 3 years. He's getting ready to go to jail for at least a year. Do I wait or move on? This isn't the first time he's spent some time in jail during our relationship. I need advice!!
Erica

Slacker asked if during the seven month stretch, was she able to visit him? He doesn't think he'd be able to do that. Erica said you can see them through the computer screen AT the jail, not skype from home or anything and nothing psychical. Slacker asks if her boyfriend says he's sorry or he promises it will never happen again. How does he make this better?

Steve says he's a repeat offender and there's no end in sight. Steve would get out ASAP. He asks how you can love a guy who keeps breaking the law and putting others in danger. Is she's scared she won't find someone to love her again?

Should she wait or move on? What's your advice for her?

That's a tough one being a girl. It's harder for us to let go of a man regardless of the situation. I would say though, she should move on with her life. If he's okay with spending so much of his life in jail, that's a turn off. Plus, he's getting DUI's!? That's terrifying that he doesn't care about himself or others enough to not drink and drive.

Intern Alli!

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Weird Way Ya Met

Yi!
A map of the places where the most missed connections happen has been all over the internet. The most frequent place people missed their change at love? Wal-Mart!!! Or jury duty, maybe? Flirting is a great cure for boredom! Some even say they met their men after they were purposefully rear-ended in order for them to get their digits! Another girl was going on a blind date, approached the wrong guy but they ended up hitting it off! Someone else even met someone at Chuck-E-Cheese while watching their younger sibling.

Slacker thinks you could just go up to someone in Wal-Mart easily and tell them you fancy them rather than use the miss-encounters on Craigslist. It makes more sense to use Craigslist for meeting someone because you go there looking for that, usually Wal-Mart, you're busy looking for stuff. The first time Slacker saw his now wife was at the strip club! Slacker and Steve are opposites in the way that Steve is a great opener but he can't close. Slacker though, is a horrible opener but can always close!

Steve says some miss-encounters are at home! Like the plumber or service person. Steve usually waits for the girls to make the moves, not him!

What weird place have you found love?

I met my current boyfriend on Twitter! We had been following each other for about a year and one day I decided to write him. On our first date we were supposed to see a movie but we ended up talking for so long, we missed it. We talked every day since then and now have been together for two years.

Intern Alli!

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Sucky Students

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A Florida teacher calls the cops after her five year old student "groped her vagina" again. She said the student has gotten progressively aggressive and vulgar. No charges have been filed. A high school in Tennessee found a 14 year old student offering sex in the boy's bathroom during lunch for money. The line for the boy's bathroom would have a line out the door. Suspensions have taken place.

Slacker says he was an amazing student. Slacker says he was so entrenched with the good life that he did not hang out with bad kids. Slacker hated when the schools would hire substitutes for music class who knew nothing about music.

Steve threw a dodgeball at a teacher that he thought was a "major b!" She fell and spilled the paint that was in her hands.

What are your "sucky student" stories?

I was a sucky student. Thought I was a "class clown" at the time… no I was awful. My girlfriend and I would shoot spit balls at my math teacher during his lecture. Mr. Adams if you are reading this I'm sorry!

Signed,
Intern Madison
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OPP: Boyfriend's BFF Dating Young

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Veronica's boyfriend's best friend just recently started dating a new girl. The girl is 21 years old which is younger than everyone else in the group. The younger girl likes to go to clubs, party, and thinks she knows it all. Veronica says she always gets stuck with her at the end of the night and she just cannot relate to the young girl whatsoever. She does not like going out with the group now. However, but her boyfriend does with or without Veronica.

Slacker says Veronica and this girl have nothing in common. He asks Veronica "Is she prettier than you? Could you be jealous of her youthfulness because you don't have that youthfulness anymore? She says, "Yes maybe." Slacker thinks couple relationships rarely work.

Steve asks Veronica, "Is it her personality or age?" She responds with, "I don't know." Steve says she is insecure maybe because she is no longer the only female in the group.

What advice do you have for Veronica in this situation?

I think Veronica should get used to being around her. It is not her choice who her boyfriend's best friend dates. If she cannot get used to it than she should stay home and let her boyfriend go out them and not throw a fit.

Signed,
Intern Madison
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Found It

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A man in Kansas City found an envelope on the ground that contained a pair of World Series tickets. He did not keep them instead he gave them to a police officer and the officer tracked down the owner. The tickets were meant to be auctioned off at a local church charity event. The tickets were worth 3,000 dollars for the pair. A man in Washington got pulled over for an unknown traffic violation and the when the police searched the car they found 130,000 dollars' worth of pot in the trunk. The man was charged with possession and distributing of the 52 pounds of pot.

Slacker says he would have scalped the World Series tickets because he would have felt weird sitting the seats. When Slacker was young he and his friends found a scrap book that had two pages filled with old World War I stamps. He gave the book to his mother and she tracked down the owner who was more than thrilled to receive it back.

Steve said that if you sit in the seats after not returning the tickets security or someone will find you but they cannot prove you did not buy them from someone else. When Steve was younger his friend found a sheriff's badge and kept it.

What are your "found it" stories?

Signed,
Intern Madison
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Brutal Breakups

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A Florida woman is serving eight years in prison for deliberately trying to ruin her ex-boyfriends life. The couple dated for three years. After they broke up she became obsessed with destroying him she even sent him to jail in 2012 after she hacked his email and sent pornographic material to his boss which ultimately got him fired from his job after 24 years. This woman went to the police station with a bloody face and told the police that he had beat her. She then told the police he started a sex ring with hid teenage son and threatened the life of his new girlfriend and her teenage daughter. The police found notes detailing everything she has done to him and locked her up for eight years in the Florida County Jail.

Slacker claims he has never had a brutal or a bad breakup but he said Steve's ex was "extremely crazy."

Steve has dealt with a bad break up because he had a "psycho" ex-girlfriend. Steve says his ex-girlfriend sent emails to Slacker and his wife claiming that Steve and Slacker's wife had relations. She tried to ruin the show and their relationship. Steve's ex also put tiny metal pieces in his tires.

What are your brutal breakup stories?

Not a proud moment for sure but when I found out my ex –boyfriend was cheating on me so I decided to take a baseball bat to the rear of his truck. It was already a dented truck so the damage was not that noticeable and he never said anything. I went Carrie Underwood for a split second.

Signed,
Intern Madison
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OPP: Threesome Gone Wrong

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My husband and I were having a tough time after our 2nd baby and we decided to try to spice things up. We agreed to have a threesome with another woman. I was all for it and thought it would help. We hooked up with a friend of a friend that we trusted. We said we would be open with each other and voice any concerns we had. When things got going, she became very aggressive towards my husband. He was a little hesitant at first but then he started to return her advances. I was so shocked I didn't know what to do. He kept asking me if everything was okay and I said it was, even though I knew it wasn't. I kept telling myself I was just nervous and over-reacting. That happened almost 3 months ago and things still aren't the same between us. I can't look at him the way I used to. I feel gross when he tries to touch me because I think of him touching her. I can barely talk to him without thinking about that night. I wish it never would have happened. My question is, will it be like this forever? We have a life and kids together and I can't just walk away from everything. I don't want to go to counseling. Is there anything else I can do to get over this? Will my marriage ever be the same again?
-Candy

Slacker thinks both Candy and her husband made mistakes. He does not understand how swingers can do what they do because Slackers says, "He could never handle seeing his wife in bed with another man." He thinks that Candy has a very specific marital problem and that the threesome has "wrecked her brain." Slackers says, "If Candy's post dramatic stress syndrome is to terrible she cannot stay even if she has kids because she does not feel right about her husband."

Steve says, "She made her bed." He thinks that swingers "love each other but are not in love with each other because they do not attach love to the physical things." In Steve's opinion women are emotional and get attached really easily to the physicality's of sex. Because there are kids involved Steve thinks that there are "so many ramifications." If she cannot walk away Steve says maybe a "foursome" would fix the problem.

Will Candy's marriage ever be normal again?

There is no way there marriage could ever be the same because she will never forget about the threesome. Even if the issue is not at the forefront of her brain it will always be in the back.

Signed,
Intern Madison
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GMD: Blended Family

Yi!

Hailey and David just got married about a year ago and they are having a huge post-marital decision. Hailey has two boys from a previous relationship. Hailey is trying to integrate the two families and things are not going as planned. Hailey is the main authority in the house so the kids do not listen to David when he tries to discipline them. David wants Hailey to back him up on when he is disciplining the kids to build respect. Hailey says, "No let's just let nature take its course."

Slacker asks David, "What do you want her to do? Call you dad?" David does not need to be called dad but he does want respect. Slacker said you need to get on the same page with each other because if not the families will never integrate effectively. Slacker thinks Hailey and David are both wrong in this situation.

Steve asks Hailey, "Since you have been the main disciplinary in the house are you unwilling to give up your authority over your children?" She says she is willing to have David be a disciplinary in their house. Steve thinks the couple needs to get used to each other to have an effective blending of families. If the families do not blend well, Steve thinks that the kids will play the victim card for the rest of their lives.

Whose side are you on?

It is hard to pick a side in this because you cannot force people to be supportive of something or someone they are not and you have an obligation to back up your spouse on some issues. If I had to side I would choose David's side because Hailey did marry him and when you marry someone you have to be supportive of them and if they are being disrespect it the spouse should help the issues and build respect,.

Signed,
Intern Madison
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TV Best Friends

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Buzzfeed threw together a list of who would you rather choose as your best friend out of TV show characters. The list included TV characters such as Chandler and Joey from Friends, Miranda and Charlotte from Sex and the City, even SpongeBob or Patrick.

Slacker said he would choose Pornstache from Orange is the New Black. He said that guy is such a big d-bag that you could take him anywhere and you would always look like the cool guy. He would choose Pornstache so he feels like a better person all the time.

Steve would choose MacGyver. He said he was choosing MacGyver because he could get you out of all kinds of situations.

Lil' D said at first he was leaning towards Kelso from That '70s Show. He said it would be fun to have that friend that is up for whatever, whenever. After some thought though, he decided to change his BFF to Mike from Breaking Bad. Everyone needs a cleanup guy in their life.

Who would you TV best friend be? Who would you chose to be your best friend out of Slacker, Steve, or Lil' D?

That is a very hard decision to make. I would have to choose Lil' D because he has the coolest name out of trio. Badda Bing Badda Boom!

Signed,
Intern Madison
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Sneeze

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A man in Indianapolis, Ohio flipped over his semi-truck off the highway after he sneezed. The semi-truck was carrying loads of dirt which spilled all over the highway. Cleanup crews spent two hours cleaning up the mess. The driver was not severely injured just a sore back and some scrapes. A woman in Nanjing, China will tell everyone from now on not to hold in your sneezes. She was trying to keep quiet during a wedding ceremony when she felt a sneeze coming on, she held in the sneeze and ended up bursting her eardrum. She later went to the hospital that night after extreme ear pain. One day in 2007, Peter Fletcher decided to begin counting his sneezes. After seven years of counting all of his sneezes Peter has sneezed over 4,000 times.

Slacker admitted that he is a loud sneezer and his family recently told him that they don't like it. Lil' D agreed with Slacker's family. He said that Slacker's sneeze is overly animated and way too long. Both Slacker and Steve said Lil' D has the worst sneeze of all-time because he holds it in. They said that he is going to hurt himself if he keeps holding it in.

What are your sneezing stories?

I was driving and had to sneeze and when I sneezed I head-butted myself on the steering wheel and almost lost control of the car.

Signed,
Intern Madison
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OPP: Daughter's First Period

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Edward is a single dad and he has a young teenage daughter. His daughter is around the age where she will begin to start her period. There was a sleepover at Edward's house and he heard his daughter tell the other girls that she hasn't had her's yet. Edward realized it is right around the corner and he has no idea what to do. He does not know if he talks to her about that time of the month or even if teaches her all about it.

Slacker asked if he has open lines of communication with his daughter. Edward said that they have talked about pretty much everything, but this is a big deal! Slacker said that he had no idea how he would handle this situation if he were a single dad.

Steve said Edward sounds like an awesome dad. He doesn't know how he would approach this if he was in this situation. Steve thinks that he should have his daughter talk to the school nurse.

What should Edward do in this situation?

I think Edward should have his mother or even a sister if he has one or a close girlfriend talk and teach his daughter all about periods because when it comes to that stuff guys have no idea what they are talking about.

Signed,
Intern Madison
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Steal From Work

Yi!

A woman in a New Jersey Sears was caught stealing 3.7 dollars' worth of merchandise from the Sears Distribution Center. The 32 year old woman was selling the high end products after she had stolen them. After a long term investigation she was arrested with second degree theft charges and is being kept on a 50,000 dollar bail. 22 year old, Derek Skyler Brux was being held in the Campbell County Detention Center in Gillette, Wyoming after stealing a train. Brux decided to steal a train to protest working conditions at the company Rail Link. He took the stolen train on a 13 mile joy ride which ended by him crashing into another locomotive. Brux is facing felony charges as well as reckless endangerment charges and destruction of property. Brux stated, "I wanted to see what it was like to hit something, so I hit at it."

The president of the company was in town today and about 10 seconds before we went on the air, Slacker realized that we were on in the speakers in the hall. He was hesitant to admit it, but finally came clean to stealing reams of paper from work. He justified his crime by saying that he printed a lot of stuff for the show at home. He said he pays for his own ink, so the least the company can do is supply some of the paper.

Steve says the only thing he takes at work is food that is in the building. He said if the company expects him to work, he needs to be alive. He also admits to once stealing an entire liquor store from a job.

Have you ever stolen something on the job?

I was doing a promotion for my job which I am still currently at and I had to wear our new hats that just came in and they were for sale. I loved the hat so I did not let anyone buy it. I was supposed to give it back after the promotion had ended so I pretended to put it back in the merchandise box which was conveniently right next to my bag. I walked out with the hat. I did not get caught and I still wear it frequently just not to work.

Signed,
Intern Madison
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Reunion

Yi!

A woman lost 50 pounds in seven months so she could attend her 50th high school reunion wearing the 50-year-old dress she loved as a student. She was 175 pounds but wanted to be as slim as she was when she was 18. She created her own plan, "WWW." Walking, water, and watching what she put in her mouth!

Slacker is wondering why people even go to high school reunions? The first one Slacker went to was only because there were people who he wanted to see that used to give him a hard time before he was a rock star! He was able to make it to his reunion for a little bit until it was time for him to hit the road for a show, he felt pretty slick having his tour bus outside waiting for him! Slacker knows why men would want to go because they want to run game but doesn't know why women would want to go.

Steve says the people at the reunion won't even remember that dress from way back when. Steve wanted to go to his high school reunion but they couldn't find him because he was living on Cape Cod. By the time they finally found his address, it was too late to attend, but he did get some nice 'cred!

What crazy reunion story do you have? Finally hooked up with the guy you've always wanted to?

I have a feeling reunions won't even exist anymore by the time mine would be. If they do however, I will never be attending!

Intern Alli!

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Stuck

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Firefighters recently rescued a drunken college student after she got her head stuck in a recycling bin. She was in a comfortable position and her feet were touching the ground. She said it was dark and smelly; she'd obviously been drinking…a lot. A couple was having relations in the ocean and was hospitalized after being stuck together; due to suction, yes that really happens!

Slacker is a scuba diver but he hasn't learned anything about making love in salt water. He almost doesn't believe this story! Slacker tells a story about a woman who got stuck in a chimney. She was dating a guy and he had called it off so she snuck into his chimney. Her plan was to slowly creep down but she got stuck. When Slacker was young, he didn't realize if you stick your head through banisters, your ears only fold one way. He's also been stuck on an airplane for seven hours and a little child barfed on himself. They had to sit in his stench with no A/C the whole time.

Steve absolutely believes that people can get stuck if they're in salt water! Steve said that firefighters had to dissemble brick by brick and use soap to get the stocker girl out of the chimney.

What weird places have you been stuck?!

Intern Alli!

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OPP: Military Ex

Yi!

Is closure something everyone needs when they end a relationship? Today's OPP says no and when you hear the closure his girlfriend is asking for, you just may agree with him.

Yi,
My girlfriend wants to meet up with her ex-boyfriend from like five years ago. I'm really not happy about it because but I can understand why she would want to go. He went away to serve in the army and they broke up when he was away. Things just didn't work out or whatever. She said she feels likes she just needs to talk to him for closure and I trust her, but I feel like it could be a mistake. What do you think?
Eric

Slacker says guys don't really need closure, they can just say bye. Girls on the other hand, feel differently and wonder why. Eric can't really say yes or no, either way it could be bad. If you're not in a committed marriage, kids, or home payments then it's easier to go get closure. He wouldn't put his marriage at risk though for any of his ex's. Slacker would not be comfortable if his wife was the one who wanted closure with an ex. Although, he has one ex who he feels he owes closure to.

Steve thinks the girlfriend is pining. This guy is the "one who got away." If she doesn't get closure, she'll always be thinking about him when she's around Eric. When Steve is giving closure to a girl, he usually lies and says, "I'm kind of seeing someone…"

What's your advice for him?

Intern Alli!

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Everyone Knew But Me

Yi!

We found a guy that admitted he has been using a common, everyday object incorrectly his entire life! A man thought the actual toilet seat was for women only! When shopping for a new toilet and the sales man joked about getting one that automatically puts the seat down. The guy jokes back saying, "If I didn't have a wife I wouldn't have to buy one with a seat." He pointed out that he's a guy and therefore doesn't put the seat down; he sits on the rim of the bowl. The sales person then asks, "But what about when you need to poop?" A little while later, he embarrassingly realized how he had been misunderstanding the toilet!

Slacker says being a part of the "everyone knew but me" category makes you feel like you've been living a lie you're whole life. Once when Slacker and a coworker were having lunch, he asked her if she had a piece of gum. She grabs a fresh pack out of her purse then starts looking for something to rip off the cellophane but is struggling hard. She had no idea there was a tab for you to pull to get the gum open. Also, plastic wrap has two little tabs on the sides to punch out so you can hold on and get the right amount of plastic you want out. A lot of coffee shops will have signs that say, "Free Wi-Fi." A man Slacker knew thought Wi-Fi was a real person and wanted to get him free. On the toilet topic, Slacker is confused, wondering if his parents potty trained him!? Someone messed that up.

Steve read an article "at a fast pace" and thought ISIS was in space and taking over the space station. Slacker had to let him know that it said "ISS." Steve for President! He also says the guy must have to figure out ways to sit on the toilet since it's wider now that he lifts the seat up, awkward!

What's your "everyone knew but me" story?!

Intern Alli!

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Movie Moment

Yi!

Another day, another real-life Walter White! A community college chemistry professor is busted for cooking and selling meth. Cops got a tip about the drugs being made and found 14 grams in his house and another 16 grams in his pockets. He had taken time away from teaching and getting his doctorate to attend rehab.

Slacker is absolutely terrified of clowns so that News story about clowns roaming California with their faces painted, carrying balloons, and walking around at night freaks him out! Slacker says it's just impossible to rob or steal anything from a casino! You have to get all the way to the back; it's not something that can be done!

Steve started off by trying to take credit for an actual movie that he has seen… Slacker didn't fall for it. He says if you try to rob a casino and you even make it outside, you're still in a desert! You can't get away with it.

What's your unbelievable movie moment?

Intern Alli!

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Toilet

Yi!

Firefighters rushed to an 85-year-old woman's home after getting her arm stuck in a toilet. She was fishing for her dentures that fell in the tank and was stuck for four hours! Firefighters had to soap her arm to get her free and we don't know if she ever got her teeth back. Another woman compensated $35,000 for falling off the toilet in her own home. She had just had her bathroom retiled and when a tile fell, it scared her so much she fell forward off the toilet and hurt her knee. Memphis Police tip over porta-potty to catch criminal hiding inside! He heard the cops saying, "On three! Three!" He thinks they took it too far.

Slacker said about a week ago, his toilet wasn't working in his kid's room. He was trying to plunge it and nothing was happening so he used the toilet snake and he could feel where the clog was. He starts yanking and pulling the snake up and it was a baseball sized toilet paper mess with Lego guys hooked to it. His kids were playing submarine games and someone flushed it so Slacker saved about five Lego dudes lives!

Steve installed new slam-proof toilet seats and he's pretty excited about it!

What's your crazy toilet story?

Uhm... Thankfully I don't have one!

Intern Alli!

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OPP: Husband Doesn't Like Pregnant Body

Yi!
Having your first child can really put a strain on your relationship. Today's OPP has her first child on the way and needs your help figuring out how to fix the damage it's caused her relationship.
Yi guys,
My husband and I are expecting our first child in just a few weeks. I needed to look up something and grabbed my husband's phone. When I unlocked it, I saw a text conversation between him and a friend talking about our relations life. He said it was weird and creepy having relations now and he was "grossed out by my body." I'm disappointed that he didn't tell me how he feels, and I found his comments about my body to his friend as somewhat of a betrayal. I'm scared that after I have our baby and my body goes through the changes that come with childbirth and breastfeeding that he won't want anything to do with me in the bedroom. As a woman I'd like to think my changing body (which is difficult for me to handle) wouldn't be up for discussion, but apparently it is, and I fear this is the beginning of him losing attraction for me for good. Is this something every couple goes through before having a baby? Am I overreating because of the hormones or is he a jerk?
Heidi

Slacker says it's not wrong to tell your buddy that it's a little weird seeing her body changing. It doesn't mean that he doesn't love her; he's just smart enough to not tell her!! There is a section of population that think pregnant women are hot and attractive just like Slacker did with his wife. Not ALL of the population thinks that a huge belly is all that though!

Steve thinks it's a legitimate concern! He says most men are concerned about the relations AFTER the baby, that most men are hoping for a C-section.

What's your advice for her?

So harsh for her to find out the way she did but that was her own fault. I would have been upset about it because of the wording he chose but she probably talks about him to her girlfriends too!

Intern Alli!

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UFOs

Yi!

A new YouTube video of astronauts doing spacewalk outside the International Space Station has gone viral after a UFO was detected, hovering around the astronauts. Soon after the appearance of the UFO, they took the live video feed offline. When NASA resumed the feed, the object had vanished! Another man said when he was 17-years-old he lost his virginity to an extraterrestrial woman who appeared human! In West Virginia, 3 football field sized crafts, UFOs, were spotted, then followed by a fourth air craft that was a bit smaller. The men who spotted the crafts were shocked that they didn't make any noise being as close to them as they were.

Slacker wants so badly to prove to Steve that UFOs are a real thing. The phones in the studio are currently not working right now and Slacker is pretty positive that the aliens are shutting them down purposely to keep them from being exposed!

Steve doesn't think a UFO means there are aliens! It's simply just an unidentified flying object. Steve is amused by the fact that aliens can't see in the dark or they tip-toe through people's homes!?

Have you been abducted? Have you spotted a UFO?

Intern Alli!

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Surgery Stories

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Andrew Walls a Delaware man is suing the Delaware Surgery Center for "emotional distress." Walls underwent a colonoscopy and then woke up and found he was wearing women's pink underwear. Walls did not find the practical prank humorous in any manner. His attorney says, "The defendant's extreme and outrageous conduct went beyond all possible bounds of decency. When the plaintiff recovered from the effects of the anesthesia administered by defendants, he awoke to realize that while he was unconscious pink women's underwear had been placed on his body. When the plaintiff initially presented for his colonoscopy he had not been wearing pink women's underwear and at no time did the plaintiff voluntarily, knowingly or intentionally place the pink women's underwear upon himself." A woman in Russia is being slammed for taking selfies with a 19 year olds spleen and posting the picture on Instagram captioning the image "schizo" because the 19 year old tried committing suicide. The nursing student currently still has her job with the hospital. A woman in France is the first woman to sing through an entire throat surgery. The singer did not want to lose her singing voice during surgery.

Slacker says that he was supposed to undergo the same surgery that Joan Rivers just currently died from. Slacker thinks the worst surgery to have is to be conscious while getting a camera shoved up your nose and down your throat. He says that when he got that procedure done the surgeons made him talk during it before he almost passed out while watching a live stream video of the inside of his nose.

Steve woke up from an emergency appendectomy. He says that the surgeons were pulling out his appendix and placing it on a tray when he sat up in the middle of the surgery. The surgeons thought it was so bizarre that they called fellow employees into the operating room to view Steve.

What are your weird surgery stories?

About 3 years ago I snapped both bones in my right leg so they put me under to reset it and cast me. In the middle of the casting the doctor was taking a saw to the cast to give me a little comfort, the saw woke me up from my anesthesia and I started screaming because I thought they were trying to saw my leg off.

Intern Madison
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OPP: Birthday Month

Yi!

Nick has a dilemma and it revolves all around his girlfriend's birthday. His girlfriend is the type that likes to turn her birthday into a birth-month and she wants Nick to do something special for her everyday leading up to her birthday. He thinks that celebrating her birthday for a month is childish. Birthday has day in the moth so Nick does not understanding celebrating for an entire month. Nick does not want to do this for the rest of his life.

Slacker asks Nick, "You're dating a woman right? Not a child?" Slacker thinks that even celebrating for a week is way too long and he thinks it is immature because birthdays are only designated for one day. People have to be "forced" to enjoy someone's month long birthday. Slacker says he stopped celebrating after his 21st birthday because there is nothing left to celebrate after that. "The word day is in the title, drop it?"-Slacker

Steve stopped celebrating his birthday after his Golden Birthday. Steve thinks that Nick needs to wean his girlfriend off of her birthday month celebration by celebrating her birthday for a week then the following year celebrate it for a day. Steve thinks that every female and Slacker celebrate their birthday all month long.

Are you the type of person that celebrates their birthday all month long or even a week?

I celebrate my birthday only one day out of the year. I agree with Nick, I think celebrating your birthday for a whole month or even a week is childish. It is even almost selfish expecting your friends to give you extra special attention because you lived another year longer.

Intern Madison
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Crying

Yi!

Everyone can admit to crying to get something we want at least once. It is basically hard wired in our DNA to use our emotions. Maybe you cried to get out of a speeding ticket or get out of a bill. Tears get results. As toddlers we cried at every "No!" and that would get us what we wanted the majority of the time. However a Canadian study finds that the older you get the more strategic one has to use their tears because tears can actually perform the opposite effect and get you further away from your ultimate goal of crying. The study found that the more a person cries the less genuine they become because "tears look like a tool to manipulate."

Slacker says that crying is an empathetic situation that always works on me. Crying is an emotional game and Slacker thinks it is a scam. Slacker thinks that if he ever tried to use crying to get out of a speeding ticket the cops would have him on the pavement getting searched.

Steve shares his story about a pizza delivery guy that gave him a sob story about him not being able to see his daughter so Steve threw him some extra big bucks onto his tip. Steve thinks that crying works in almost every situation

What are your "I cried to get out get out of…" stories?

I had a 20 page paper that I put off until the deadline. The night before and into the early morning I was cramming to get the paper done. As I was finishing the last page the computer shut down and I forgot to save my paper. The professor and I did not get along but I had to run to him immediately and cry, plead, and beg him to give me an extension and of course the crying worked and I had a week to complete it.

Intern Madison
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Crossroads

Yi!

We all have those crossroads moments in life that drastically change everything. Maybe you are about to move to a different state and the love of your life stops you in the airport. Maybe you are offered a job and the moment you are about to interview for it you get a job offer of your dreams.

Slacker explains that when he left his band he had a crossroads when finding a new job. Slacker had two choices to make, work as an intern making five dollars an hour or DJ at a strip club making 500 dollars to 1000 dollars a night and get any women you want whenever you want. Slacker says he turned down the internship and as he was pulling into the parking lot of the strip club he decided at last minute that he could not go through with it. Slacker ended up getting a new job after declining both.

Steve hit a crossroads when he was joining the army. Steve says that there was a draft when he was in high school and he joined, preformed the oath, he was almost signed in minus a document that he signs when he turns 18. Steve says he was also a "juvenile delinquent" and that he called his probation officer and told him that "he did not look good in green." His probation officer called the recruiting officer that was pestering Steve to follow through with his prior commitments and told him Steve could not join because he was a delinquent.

My personal crossroads story is when I was choosing colleges. I was offered a soccer scholarship to go play in at Texas Christian University. I was not prepared to move but I wanted a to attend a good school so I chose TCU as I was getting ready to move Colorado Christian University called me and offered me a scholarship to come play and start training immediately so I got to stay in Colorado and get my school paid for to play soccer.

What are your crossroads stories?

Intern Madison
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Stupid Stealers

Yi!

A woman in Philadelphia on Sunday stole the prosthetic leg of a veteran at the Eagles football game. She took off with the leg and it was later found early Monday morning on the subway train. Dallas Cowboys football player was arrested for shoplifting cologne and underwear in a Dillards in Dallas. The costs of the items were 123.50 dollars before tax. The football star, Joseph Randle was taken to jail and posted bond early Tuesday morning. A woman is facing felony charges for stealing 16.26 dollars worth of soda and Halloween candy from an Ohio Walmart. She was taken to jail and is still currently serving time under 7,000 dollars in bonds. A truck in St. Petersberg, Florida was stolen this past week containing 35,000 pounds of Crisco. The truck has not been recovered.

Slacker says that anytime he has ever stolen something it was not a stupid steal because he had a point. Regarding the story of the stolen Crisco Slacker says that is an extremely stupid steal. He would understand someone stealing a truck filled with Apple products but Crisco? No. Another point Slacker brings up about the Dallas football player getting busted for stealing cologne and underwear, "He's a running back for the Cowboys! How can he not out run a security guard?"

Steve thinks there is no other use for Crisco but to fry some chicken! Steve understands the reason why the football player stole underwear because the underwear was Gucci and that is justifiable. Steve does not understand why these people that have endless amounts of money steal things. They have secret shoppers in Walmart and Steve says he can always point them out because they always wear "mom jeans and puffy vests."

My one and only stupid steal was about a year ago when I stole a 15 dollar ring from a jewelry store. I did not bring my wallet because I was just tagging along with a friend. I tried this cute turquoise ring on that was obviously too small but I managed to cram it on my finger. I could not expectantly get the ring off so I put my hand in my pocket and walked out. My friend resized it for me and I have not taken it off since.

What are your stupid steals? Or what stories do you have regarding stupid steals?

Intern Madison
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Topics : Sports
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Locations : DallasFloridaPhiladelphia
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OPP: Late Night Ex

Yi!

Sean was in bed with his girlfriend at 1:30 in the morning and her phone buzzes, it was her ex-boyfriend. Sean's girlfriend silenced her phone and ignored the call. She told him not to worry because she loves him and her ex was probably drunk. Sean is concerned because he is thinking, "What if this happens all the time when I'm not around?" and, "What if she actually answers if this does happen frequently?"

Slacker says that if she was cheating she would have ignored the phone call from her ex and if she was not cheating she would still ignore the phone call from her ex. Slacker thinks that Sean is going to have to confront her and let him know how he feels and what his exact concerns are because if he feels uncomfortable about the situation than he is fully justified to confront the matter. Slacker thinks that Sean should ask his girlfriend to talk to her ex and tell him to stop contacting her.

Steve asks Sean, "Do you think this has happened before?" Sean knows that his girlfriend's ex has contacted her before. Steve thinks that if you confront her Sean should be nonchalant about the situation and non-accusing. Steve also thinks that Sean should confront the ex himself and talk it out or maybe even duke it out but her ex is in the military like Sean, so Steve thinks only to confront him if you out rank him. Steve says that Sean's girlfriend should have blocked her ex-boyfriend's number.

I think that Sean should not read too much into the situation because that is why trust is incorporated in relationships. I think he definitely needs to confront his concerns with his girlfriend though however.

Do you think Sean should be worried?

Intern Madison
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GMD: Pet Costume

Yi!

Troy and Audrey have been dating for a while and they share a dog together named Prince. Audrey is obsessed with dressing her dog up in various costumes. Example, Audrey's plan is to dress up Prince as Kanye West and she would go as Kim Kardashian. Troy absolutely hates that she dresses up their dog because he thinks it is border line animal abuse because their dog has a "heartbeat and a soul." Troy thinks that it is terrible that Prince spends more time in Audrey's purse dressed up than in a park. He thinks that because Audrey spends all of this time finding costumes for their dog, when they have children she is going to spend the majority time finding costumes for them so she is going to be lacking the time to parent which is making him question her ability to be an effective mother.

Slacker is not a fan of dressing dogs in costumes and Audrey is treating living things as objects by dressing her dog up. Slacker asks Troy, "If you had children with a heartbeat and a soul would you put a costume on them?" Slacker thinks that this argument between Troy and Audrey is not just about dressing their dog up in costumes. In Slacker's opinion Troy has just a problem with Audrey not their dog.

Steve thinks that Troy is questioning her ability as a mom because she spends the majority of their time together finding costumes for Prince. Steve agrees with Slacker and thinks that there are underlying issues of this situation and argument. Steve asks, "Is it cruelty to dress up a dog?" and as expected Troy agrees.

I personally am not a fan on dressing up dogs on a daily bases. I think that dressing your dog up for Halloween is totally fine but that is only once a year. I know my dogs hate to be in costumes but I would not go as far to say that it is cruelty or border line animal abuse. I am on Troy's side though however, because I think most dogs would hate to be dressed up every day.

Whose side are you on?

Intern Madison
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People : AudreyKanye WestKim KardashianPrinceTroy


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Thought It Was Gone Forever

Yi!

A parrot missing from its owner for four years left with a British accent was found and returned with having the ability to speak Spanish. A tortoise that was lost for 30 years was found in a box in the owners own house. The tortoise "escaped" when construction workers accidently left the door open. A lost Bible was found in tornado debris after 40 years. The owner of the Bible was gifted to her by her father and when she lost it she was heartbroken. A tornado 40 years later swept through the town and an individual turned the Bile in and the owner stumbles across it.

Slacker says that if the tortoise did actually escape from the house the owners could have walked 40 feet in any direction to find it. He wonders that if when the tortoise was found did it speak Spanish.

Steve says that tortoise "bolted." That must be one quick turtle that the owners could not find it. He wonders if the owners even bothered to look. Regarding the story of the missing Bible Steve asks, "Why would the dad buy his daughter a Bible when they are free in hotels?"

What are your "I thought it was lost" stories?

Intern Madison
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Family Fued

Yi!

Two great grandmothers in Pittsburgh were kicked out of the local hospital for fighting over their great grandchildren being born and the well-being of the children. One of the grandmothers was charged with assault and harassment after she struck the other great grandmother, knocking out her hearing aid and knocking her to the floor. A family fight on a Sunday afternoon ended with an uncle being shot by his nephew in Huntsville, Alabama over clothing left on the floor in their house. The uncle wanted his nephew to pick up his room and the nephew refused so he shot his uncle in the neck.

Slacker says that the only times has family feuds is unfortunately when it comes to family deaths. The feuds are mainly about, "Who gets grandpa's coins?" The story regaurding the two great grandmothers fight in the hospital Slacker thinks they need to grow up! He says he would pay more than he would pay for an MMA event or a boxing event to watch two great grandmothers fight.

Steve says he would love to see a grandmother get "leg sweeped" by another grandmother and that he would also love to watch two older women go at it as long as no one dies.

To this day me and brother have bloody battles over the remote.

What are your family feud stories?

Intern Madison
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OPP: Cheating Roommate

Yi!

Today's OPP is from Candy:
"I really need your help. I'm stuck in a sticky situation. I live with a guy roommate who is really cool and I'm good friends with him. He has a gf that I've known for about a year now and she's awesome. I love her. We've become very good friends. I recently found out though that he's been cheating on her. A lot! I've "met" two other girls already...as they've been sneaking in and out of our apartment. The gf has somewhat caught on and is now accusing him of cheating and he's been denying it of course. Now she's dragged me into the middle and is grilling me for information! So what do i do? Stay loyal to my roommate whom I have to live with and deal with...or tell his gf the truth and breakup their relationship and inevitably have him hate and resent me. Please help."
Candy

Slacker thinks that if you know someone is cheating you should keep out of the couple's business but because Candy's roommate's girlfriend is asking she should maybe tell the truth. Slacker also thinks that Candy needs to decide who she is more loyal to and if her roommate is just a roommate or if she considers him a good friend. Candy views her roommate as just a roommate and due to her view, in Slacker's opinion she should be honest with the girlfriend. If she does not want to tell the truth Slacker thinks Candy can always just sleep with her friend for a reason to continue the lie. "Is the mister more important than the sister?"- Slacker

Steve thinks Candy should lie because you have to, "Ride or die for your roommates." Candy could always play the middle girl in the situation and manipulate her roommate to pay the rent or she is going to expose the truth. Another option in Steve's opinion is to have a threesome or just decide who is more important.

I think Candy needs to tell the truth because no one deserves to be cheated on.

What would you do if you were Candy?

Intern Madison
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Dog Poop Dilemma

Yi!

Steve was outside the building having a cigarette break and he spotted a blind man with his guide dog. The man let his guide dog poop on the lawn and he did not pick it up. Not picking up your dog's poop is against the law because it is considered littering. Steve did not say anything to the man and let him continue walking.

Slacker always picks up after his dogs and sometimes gets pestered for picking up his dogs poop too slowly. He thinks some people are extremely persistent in making sure you are cleaning up after your dogs. Slacker proposes the questions for Steve, "How is he going to pick it up?" and "Should you have picked it up?" In Slacker's opinion he thinks that individuals with disabilities are treated differently than people who do not have disabilities. If he was in Steve's position he would not have said anything.

Steve said it is against the law to let your dog poop and not pick up after them and that is why he does not own any dogs. He thinks that blind people have heightened senses so he could have smelled out where his dog went to the bathroom and picked it up that way.

I would have let the blind man continue walking and I would pick up his dog's poop just because it would be easier for me to pick it up than him.

What would you do if you were in this situation?

Intern Madison
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Surviving a Breakup

Yi!

We found a list of eight essential breakup tips without having to delete your Facebook. Here's the list!
1. Quietly change your relationship status
2. Decide whether to de-friend or block your ex
3. Decide if you want to unfriend your ex's friends and family members
4. Delete tagged photos of the two of you
5. Don't friend or stalk your ex's new significant other
6. Avoid posting status updates about your breakup
7. Stay busy and lower the amount of time you're on Facebook
8. Be yourself on Facebook

Slacker has three crucial tips on surviving a tough break up. Number one is to drink booze, lots of booze. Number two is retail therapy. Slacker back in his band days would splurge on a new guitar but now he would spend his money on electronics. Lastly, but not least his number three essential tip is sleep with someone else and no not his ex-girlfriend's sister. He does not believe in revenge sex. Slacker thinks that the most ironic thing that happens when going through a break up is when you get in the car, turn on the radio and either an extremely sad break up song comes on or if you had a song with your significant other that comes on the radio.

Steve says that he always tries to make his girlfriend's break up with him first and only one break up has caught him off guard and left him heartbroken. When Steve was going through his break up he retired himself from the world for a while, did some soul searching than recovered quickly.

My tips for surviving any break up are to have a lot of beer, go dancing, and get a new tattoo. Those all seem to do the trick for me!

How do you get over a break up? What are your tips and tricks for surviving a break up?

Intern Madison
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Million Dollar Idea

Yi!

Lil D is a genius! If we have heated blankets, he wonders why we don't take that same idea and make heated jackets!? How has that not been thought of and invented yet?

Slacker thinks this is his idea but everyone else has the same one. Three students took three magnets you put on your body and your body's movement will charge your phone! Why don't the TV's on treadmills only work if you're running fast that way if you decide to walk, you can't watch anything! Slacker wants to create a restaurant called "The Fridge." There are times when you're hammered and you wish you had bought pizza yesterday so you could just warm some up, but this restaurant, there are all kinds of yesterday's food in there cold for you!

Steve invented sandwiches but he didn't want the million dollars for it, he just wanted the people to enjoy.

Lil D is acknowledging that this heated clothing thing exists but he was the first one to think of it! You have to buy this really long shirt though with a bunch of holes and you put heated pads in the pockets to warm up your blood. Lil D's idea is easier though, it's a built in electric jacket! Simple.

What's your million dollar idea?

Intern Alli!

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Foot in Mouth

Yi!

It's happened to us all. It's that moment when the words start coming out of your mouth before you really thought about what you were going to say. A waitress had brought over crayons and a coloring sheet to who she thought was a toddler. As soon as she heard a deep voice, she immediately put the crayons behind her back. Turns out the toddler was really a 26-year-old grown man with dwarfism!

Slacker was at his grocery store when he saw a guy that has one hook for a hand. He had all his groceries hanging on his arm when he dropped his cell phone. He was bending down trying his hardest to push the phone with his hook to his other hand to pick it up. Slacker goes up to him and says, "Can I give you a hand?" Oops! As he was finishing his sentence, he realized what he had said. When someone asks Slacker how work is going, he always says, "Ugh I just want to kill myself!" He had said that to someone who had just lost their friend to suicide though. He says those two things all the time, they're normal to him! At the wrong time though, they can obviously get him in trouble.

Steve says Slacker is just a D-bag and Lil D is heartless. He always thinks before he speaks or does anything!

Lil D's dad would always say, "Still breathing" when someone would ask how he was doing. Lil D heard that growing up so he always says it now when people ask him. He was at a funeral and someone asked how he was doing and he still proceeded to say still breathing!

How have you put your foot in your mouth?

Intern Alli!

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OPP: Complaints About Stay-at-Home Mom

Yi!

No matter how much you discuss it before you have kids, something usually comes up that has you disagreeing about the parenting technique you think is best. Today's OPP is fighting that battle and she says her husband has no right to say anything.

Yi! My husband keeps complaining to me about our children and I've just about had enough. He doesn't have to deal with the kids the whole day. I have to stay home and deal with these inmates. He spends a minute with them and starts complaining. I'm starting to think that he isn't good with children because all he does is complain. I do all the work around the house, make dinner, and watch my three children and he has the nerve to come home and complain. I'm thinking about getting a job and making him stay at home! How do I get him to realize that staying home with the kids is no walk in the park?
Jill

Slacker says he absolutely knows that staying home with the kids all day is a really hard job! He's only done it about twice but it is definitely difficult. You can totally complain if you're a nanny because now it's a job. Slacker thinks they're both right. He is the one making the money and working all day for the family but she also is his partner, not his employee.

Steve says it's not a job unless you are getting paid, like a nanny. If the husband wasn't getting a promotion fast enough, the wife would complain so why can't he complain about her "job?" Steve thinks the joy of being the bread-winner is he doesn't have to deal with the kids.

What's your advice for Jill?

Kids or no kids, being home all the time would drive me up the wall. Go get a part-time job just to have something else to do! Have a babysitter so you both can have alone time.

Intern Alli!

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Am I The Only One?

Yi!

Society is full of all kinds of rules and regulations. Things you're supposed to do and ways you're supposed to act...but we all have that little voice in our head that says "do it!" Sticking your finger in a stranger's sandwich, maybe?!

Slacker said our producer Lil D had his homemade sandwich in his studio with one absolutely perfect bite taken out of it. Slacker wanted so badly to push his fingers into the sandwich, take a bite out of it, and leave it there for him to find! When he's driving down the highway and sees a moving van with a ramp he wants to drive up on it and fly up over it. Is Slacker the only one who rides an escalator full of people, gets to the top, and wants to fall down on top of everyone? I think so!

Steve say Lil D's potato chip bag was sitting on the table too and he wanted to just smash the bag. He wanted to crush all the chips and flatten out the entire bag. Steve's am I the only one is wanting to be in a bank and smash the fire alarm, with his elbow to be specific, so people will all run out and he can easily walk into the vault.

Lil D's am I the only one is when he is stuck in traffic near a construction zone, he wants to steal some sort of equipment to get the cops on his tail. He wants to smash through all kinds of cars just to see how far he can actually make it before he's caught. He also wants to rob an armored car just to see if he could actually do it!?

What crazy things do you secretly want to do? What's your "Am I the only one?"

I completely agree with the caller Candy, I ALWAYS squeeze my dog so tightly I could probably break his bones. I stop myself though… Ha.

Intern Alli!

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Stuck In Nose

Yi!

A woman had been traveling when she started to have nosebleeds. At first, she didn't think much of it since she had been in a motorbike accident. At home, she saw what she thought was a blood clot in her nose and had tried to blow it out a few times but couldn't. Then in the shower, a creature crawled down her lips so she jumped out to look closely in the mirror and saw it had ridges on it so she knew it was an animal! She finally goes to the ER and found out a three-inch leech had been living in her nose for a month! The doctor said if she wouldn't have come in, the leech would have made its way to her brain.

Slacker talking about this leech is just about to make him barf. He used to hang out with people who did a lot of drugs and his friend would snort Vodka to get his nose ready for all the other stuff! He is extremely confused why ANYONE would stick magnets in their nose but especially to stop a baby from crying!? He has kids and that is the last thing he thinks to do when they're upset, ha! He also knew someone who could shove a noodle up his nose and cough it back up through his mouth.

Steve says to get a leech off; you have to use a cigarette to burn it off. His solution to get those magnets out of her nose is to maybe just use a bigger magnet!

Lil D wants to make this clear, don't try any of this at home!

What have you had stuck up your nose?

My brother's ex-girlfriend was babysitting and the baby wouldn't stop crying so she shoved two magnets in her nostrils to try and make the baby happy. The magnets got shoved too high and stuck together. Her nose starts bleeding so crazy that the fire department came to pull them out. Oops!

Intern Alli!

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Post Relationship Bombshell

Yi!

Oregon Gov. John Kitzhaber found out for the first time this week that his fiancée was previously married more times than he thought. Cylvia Hayes, Oregon's first lady, kept secret a third previous marriage to a teen Ethiopian immigrant who is 11 years younger. She married him for $5,000 so he could stay in the country. Another woman, a bride-to-be reportedly became pregnant after having sex with a dwarf stripper on the night of her bachelorette party. The woman confessed to cheating on her husband after giving birth to a baby with dwarfism at a hospital in Valencia, Spain. The woman's husband allegedly believed the child was his until it was born. Oops!

Slacker doesn't think he would be that bothered if he found out his wife had married before, but the fact that it was four years long and for money, is a little much!

Steve wonders how it's her fault for getting pregnant with someone else's baby if her bridesmaids were egging her on!? Not that Steve is huge on marriage anyway but to marry your "high school sweetheart" is a big no.

What's your post relationship bombshell?

Intern Alli!

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Locations : Cylvia HayesOregonValencia
People : John Kitzhaber


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OPP: Creepy Dad

Yi!

Plenty of people have been embarrassed by their parents. The dad of today's OPP is embarrassing her on extraordinary levels...and taking it way too far!

Yi! I'm the girl with the creepy dad. He always made weird comments to my friends growing up but it wasn't anything that crossed a line. He'd compliment their outfits or their smile. Now that we're in our 20s, it's gone to a whole new level. It's like since we're adults he doesn't feel like anything is off limits. One of my friends was sitting at our table and he started rubbing her shoulders. He told her she smelled good and then got close and actually smelled her! He told another one of my friends he liked her shirt but would be thinking about what she had under it all night. That's just two examples of many things he's done. I've told him it's gross and he needs to stop, but he just laughs it off. How do I make my dad realize that he is the creepy guy all my friends talk about? I need this to stop!
Taylor

Slacker's biggest problem with this is that the daughter has already tried talking to her dad! The dude needs to get it. If this was reversed and it was a mom, it wouldn't be such a big deal. If a mom hits on a young guy, it's like congrats! For a dad though, it's gross. Slacker can't imagine what he would do if his mom did this to his friends. Can the friends even call the cops for just hair smelling?

Steve had a friend who built a pool in her backyard and after that, her dad would always ask, "When are your friends coming over?" The dad is really lucky that Taylor's friends just stop coming over and aren't calling the police or anything more serious.

What's your advice for Taylor?

Intern Alli!

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Spider Stories

Yi!

6,000 Venomous Brown Recluse spiders infest Missouri couple's home. She would see spiders and their webs every day in the mini blinds, pantry ceiling, the fireplace, even their exoskeletons were falling from the can lights. She once had to even dodge a spider in the shower when it fell from the ceiling. They sued the previous owners and no longer live in that home. Another woman started vomiting and her leg turned black with bulbous blisters swelling. She had to go to the hospital and thought she was going to lose her leg after being bitten by a false widow spider, the most venomous in Britain.

Slacker can't believe the people who lived in that home before, didn't say anything about spiders to the new couple. As soon as the tent goes over your house, Slacker would be out! Most of the spiders that hang out at Slackers house really aren't that big, but he was picking his tomato plant in his backyard and got his hand in the sticky spider web. He sounded like a girl to say the least screaming and running around. Sleeping tonight will not be easy!

Steve expected the 6,000 spider invested house would be a crap hole, but is surprised it's actually a nice house! Where was the home inspector who walked through when they bought the house?!

Lil D was helping a friend move, they rented a big moving truck and he was the one driving. Once they're down the street, he feels something tickle his ear so he scratches at it. It kept going so he's slapping his ear and a giant spider falls out and lands in his lap! He had to swerve and hit a curb!

What's your creepy, disgusting spider story?

Intern Alli!

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Celeb Houses

Yi!

Taylor Swift invites lucky fans over to her house in LA for a secret listening session in honor of her new album 1989. Taylor invited over her "super-fans" for a five hour party this past weekend in Los Angeles. She played every song that in on her new album for her guests. Instead of forcing her new album into her listener's homes, Taylor did the opposite and invited her fans over. Swift made homemade cooking, took pictures with her guests, and played with her cat, Meredith Grey.

Slacker thinks that Taylor Swift is brilliant at marketing. Slacker says that if he got invited into a celebrities' apartment he would try and befriend the celebrity by knarking on the other guests in the house. He has never been to a celebrities' house but has hung out with many rock stars when he was on tour with his band. Slacker has a friend that was installing cable and was called to go over to Michael Jackson's house to install wire. The friend of Slacker had full access to the house so he walked around and looked inside Michael Jackson's closet. On one side of the closet were folded black jeans and on the other side it was folded red shirts and that is all. The friend then walked into the bathroom and found many black scuff marks where Michael Jackson was clearly practicing his dance moves.

Steve thinks Taylor Swift is so awesome, gracious, and down to earth. Steve shares a story of one of his radio friends that got invited into a famous producer / DJ's house. Steve's friend walked around the house carrying a bottle of Grand Marnier. The friend found this producer's Grammys and decided to take shots out of them. The producer then asked Steve's friend, "How was taking shots of Grand Marnier out of my Grammys." The security had been watching him walk throughout the house the entire time. He was not kicked out of the house just got into trouble for a small amount of time until the producer calmed down a bit.

I have a friend who went home with a famous NFL football player after a night at the club. He and my friend did the deed and the next morning his wife walked into the room that they were staying in and asked them what they both wanted for breakfast.

Signed,
Intern Madison

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Falling Down

Yi!

Passions run high in Louisiana. Two lovers at an LSU football game at Tiger Stadium were making out in the crowd and fell onto a row of people when the male tried to pick up his date romantically. Not only was there spilled beer but some bruised knees as well. An eight year boy in Hawaii falls six stories down a garbage chute and survives. The boy was throwing away trash and fell through the opening in his condo. His aunt immediately ran for help and a nearby neighbor broke the glass to a fire hose and the boy was pulled up to safety. He only suffered from a couple of cuts. A flasher in Portland, Oregon tripped on his pants twice while trying to run from the police. The flasher tripped on his pants that had dropped to the ground after he tried swinging on one of the police officers. After falling the suspect tried to get up again but ended up tripping once more. The police took the suspect into custody thereafter. Joey D. Vandervort, 19, was accused of assaulting a police officer, second-degree disorderly conduct, indecent exposure, interfering with a police officer, public indecency and resisting arrest.

Slacker thinks that the neighbors and the aunt that sent the fire hose down to rescue the eight year old boy that fell down the garbage chute is the stupidest thing that he has ever heard because they are either dumb or lazy. They would rather pull the boy up 60 feet in a jagged chute than walk downstairs to open a door to go get him. Slacker gives the advice if you are going to run from the police make sure you take your pants off first.

In Steve's opinion garbage chutes are soft. Steve says, "Garbage chutes are like a slide. Like a carnival ride." So the he does not think the eight year old boy had any problem falling six stories because he lands on garbage, almost like landing on "pillows."

My embarrassing fall was when I was 12 or 13 years old and I was trying to show off my athleticism to some of my guy friends by jumping off a speeding 'merry go round'. I caught my foot on one of the bars and face planted into the rocky grounding. I had small rocks in my mouth and nose and immediately had bruises all over my face. That day was picture day which made for an interesting 8th grade picture.

What are your embarrassing falling over stories?

Signed,
Intern Madison

Photo Credit: Flickr.com
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Locations : HawaiiLouisianaOregonPortland
People : Joey D. Vandervort


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OPP: Spotting a Player

Yi!

Hannah, who is 20 years old has just started dating a new guy. She does not consider herself an experienced dater. She describes the guy she is dating as confident and always knows exactly what to say. He has many connections and takes her to nice places. She is worried that he is a player and she is just the next on his list.

Slacker thinks Hannah is fortunate because she is only 20 years old and might have found a keeper. Slacker thinks that if you are going to date someone and you take them out to a nice restaurant and all the employees know you there than it seems like you have taken a lot of dates to the exact same place. In Slacker's opinion, a non-player needs to make sure like you make it seem like you have never been to that restaurant before so that you and your date are sharing a new experience. Slacker does not think that Hannah should be concerned that he has many connections and is a smooth talker because it could be destiny.

Steve thinks that Hannah should give her date the benefit of the doubt and that she should stop reading into everything. Steve says that is, "He is good at saying everything to everyone than that could be a red flag because his smooth talking is not only personalized to Hannah but to everyone." Steve agrees with Slacker on making your date seem like you both are sharing a new experience together.

I think that Hannah is overthinking way too much. I think she needs to go with the flow and see where it leads and to be smart enough to know the red flags of someone who is not going to be suitable for her lifestyle.

What are the signs a guy might be a player? Is it a bad thing to date a player?

Signed,
Intern Madison

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GMD: Relationship Probation

Yi!

Heather and Rob have been together for a while. Heather made a mistake and cheated on Rob. Rob decided to take her back and forgive her for her discretions. However, Rob wants full access to her phone whenever he so chooses to look. Heather is unwilling to give him access to her phone because she thinks, "Why can't you just trust me because I have nothing to hide." Rob cannot understand why Heather won't give him access to check her phone especially because she says she has nothing to hide. Heather thinks that Rob is just being insecure and Rob explains that he just wants to make sure she is not cheating on him again. Rob said he would let Heather have full access to his phone, so he wants the same courtesy especially because she is the one who cheated.

Slacker says there is no right answer or side to agree with. Slacker does lean more towards agreeing with Rob's side though because Slacker thinks that Rob is not accusing Heather of cheating like she thinks he is but just making sure that she is not cheating on him again. Slacker compares Heather to the situation as relating her to being on probation and that Rob is not going to want access to her phone forever but only until he feels confident in her again. Slacker asks the question, "Is trust something you start at zero with and earn or is trust just handed out?"

Steve asks Heather if, "She feels like she is being punished?" and Heather agrees with Steve's statement. Steve thinks that it is a muddy relationship. Steve also thinks that everyone has cheated so Rob should just get used to the feeling of cheating and being cheated on.

I think that trust is something one can lose so easily and once the trust is broken in the relationship it is at a lost. I think Rob is justified in asking for access to her phone however, if he is up all night worrying about Heather cheating on him he just needs to end things with her. Love is supposed to be easy not filled with worry.

Whose side are you on?

Signed,
Intern Madison

Photo Credit: Flickr.com
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Biggest Letdown

Yi!

The biggest letdown of 2014 is by far the Broncos choke at the Super Bowl or maybe it is waking up and thinking it is Sunday when it is really Monday. Maybe it is your favorite television show ending or losing the remote control. We found a list of epic letdowns what topped the list are Plymouth Rock and prom night.

Slacker shares his story about his biggest letdown regarding being in grade school and building a view finder for three weeks to look at a lunar eclipse. He says nothing was more disappointing than going outside to look inside a box to see a dot that disappears. Slacker also thinks that he is building up the Aurora Borealis lights in his head and that they might be a possible letdown. Prom night was another let down because he could have bought a guitar for what he spent on himself and his date.

Steve thinks that Plymouth Rock was a major letdown because when he drove to view it he was expecting to see a huge boulder and in reality it was a small rock that was barred off from touching distance. Steve also thinks that the movie the Hangover was a letdown because so many people built the movie up to be the funniest movie they have ever seen and then when Steve watched it he thought it had some good parts but overall it was just ok.

My biggest letdown was traveling to the southern part of Ireland because I was expecting pubs on every corner how it was in Dublin and there were about two pubs in a 15 mile radius.

What do you think the biggest letdown is?

Signed,
Intern Madison
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Junk Injuries

Yi!

Last Friday night, Jason Garnett, from London, was aroused for 17 hours straight. Jason went to work and was obviously aroused the entire time. When Jason came home from a long day of work he tried taking an ice bath and going for a jog to try and calm himself down. Nothing prevailed. His roommate ended up taking him to the hospital later that night. His roommate stated, "You should have seen the look on his face when I told him what was wrong. He was in hysterics at first, but then he realized how serious the situation was." Jason was diagnosed with a rare condition called priapism where erections do not subside. The doctors drained two pints of blood from his manhood and gave him numerous shots to prevent blood flow. Jason stated, "Seeing them stab my penis with a needle was a horrible experience, like something out of a horror film. The pain was 10 out of 10."

Slacker shares his junk injury story that regards the time when he was a drummer in a band and he threw a drumstick in the air and it came back down and barely grazed his junk. He was immediately incapacitated and felt like he was going to vomit. Slacker ran across a study that states getting hit in the junk for males is worse than giving childbirth. Slacker says getting hit in the junk for males would feel like to a woman is "pushing 14 children out sideways."

Steve was wondering if the "upper mommy parts" get hurt and if it actually hurts woman to get hit in the junk. Steve shares that he has an awesome toilet seats that does not slam on his junk.

Signed,
Intern Madison
Photo Credit: Flickr.com
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OPP: Candy's Dilemma

Yi!

Candy and her boyfriend have been together for four years and they are currently living with one another. Candy's boyfriend's parents were in the process of purchasing a new house. Their old house sold before they found a new one so they moved in with the couple. Her boyfriend's parents found their dream house but things fell through so they are still living in their home. It has been six months and the parents are not making any plans to move out soon. Candy is frustrated because she wants her space and freedom back. Her boyfriend's mom is nosey and likes to nag Candy like any mother would. Candy's boyfriend is thrilled that his parents are living with them because they help out with cleaning and cooking. Candy wants them out but is stuck on how exactly to bring up the situation in conversation.

Slacker thinks that Candy needs to give her boyfriend an ultimatum by saying, "Someone is going to move out next month would you like it to be me or your parents?" Slacker thinks that if her boyfriend's parents are not sick or in any other circumstances to need help Candy should have a right to propose the idea of them moving out. He thinks that Candy is going to have to move out.

Steve thinks that someone has to bring up the issue but it cannot be Candy it will have to be her boyfriend. If Candy were to bring up the issue it would destroy the family dynamic and create many problems. Steve thinks though however, that because your parents raised you and sheltered you for 18 years that you owe your parents something.

I think Candy needs to bring the situation up to her boyfriend before she says anything to his parents. If Candy and her boyfriend cannot come to a compromise on a huge issue such as this then she needs to end things with him.

Do you have any advice for Candy?

Signed,
Intern Madison
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Bad Omens

Yi!

A Pittsburgh newlywed couple is familiar with bad omens. The couple was set to be married on September 6, and just days before the wedding the bride broke her foot, the maid of honor was admitted into the hospital, and the priest broke his leg. The couple made it through the unfortunate string of events and married, then they set out to Cabo San Lucas for their romantic honeymoon. Hurricane Odile swept through Cabo while they were there and the couple was stranded for three days with no running water or electricity. The hotel the couple stayed at had been evacuated so they were then sent to a shelter with other visitors. The shelter they were residing in had been damaged due to the fierce storm. Jessica, the newly made wife stated, "People in the shelter took buckets, trying to get the water in the buckets, because we were going to be flooded by the time it was going to be over." The couple returned to Pittsburgh after the storm had ended with no injuries but came home with a very frightful honeymoon experience.

Slacker believes in bad omens and signs. He shares the story of a couple who went to the jeweler to get the wife's wedding ring and engagement ring saughtered together and the husband was going to get his ring clean. The jeweler did not have an employee in the store that was able to slaughter the rings together so they sent the rings out to be completed. The jeweler lost all three rings. Slacker thinks that is a bad omen. He also shares a story of a man who was planning on proposing to is girlfriend on a hot air balloon. The basket they were in crashed into the ocean and had to be rescued. He asks, "Is that just a sign or a coincidence?" Slacker stands by his opinion, that's a bad omen!

Steve says that if he flipped through the television and on each channel he heard the words, Steve. Audi. Crash. Die. he would not drive anywhere because he heard the word Audi. Steve does not want to crash his car. He thinks that bad omens are destiny and it is meant to be.

Have you ever been involved in a bad omen?

Signed,
Intern Madison
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Diva

Yi!

"Glamping" is a thing! Glamorous camping: outdoor recreation for the folks who hate roughing it! The outdoor experience with luxury and comfort! You get to choose from large canvas tents with running water, raised wooden floors, and beds. Ariana Grande's life coach quit on her! She had a huge attitude, would only be photographed from the left side, in a certain light and she was so obsessed with her hair; she had it dyed every three days! He even said her big popular ponytail is fake!

Slacker is not into the glamping thing. If you are going to have all the extra luxury stuff, just stay home! You're not even camping if you have running water. Slacker says he has had some bad experiences with John Mayor 'diva head' but he should be put into a box after he sings. Janet Jackson needed a fresh toilet seat in all of her dressing rooms and her people have to watch them install it! Speaking of Ariana, Slacker says instead of dying her hair every day, why doesn't she just slap on new colored fake ponytails every day!

Steve is all about the glamping! He says if you camp, you can't afford a hotel. Steve thinks Janet Jackson is an anti-slap toilet seat sitter.

Do you know a diva?

Intern Alli!

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My Life is White Trash News Flash

Yi!

Everyone has a little White Trash News Flash in their life. Take the couple who got caught getting it on in a dumpster! When the police arrived, they were also charged with possession of meth. Classy! Or the guy who fired his gun into his neighbors home. He says that's "the only way he knows how to unload it." Luckily, no one was hurt! Maybe you heard about the woman who sprayed bleach in her husband's eyes and attacked him with a hammer for cheating on her… Ouch.

Slacker said there was a K-Mart in his home town when he was younger. There would be adds for stuff like the new G.I. Joe toys on super sale! But every time he got to the store, they were gone. So what he had to do was go to K-Mart, find something you like that you thought would go on sale soon and HIDE it! Then you see the sale add and realize you have those items on "redneck layaway." Nice! He still does this, but at wine stores.

Steve says he likes the idea of having a family reunion in Walmart's break room.

What makes your life White Trash News Flash?

Intern Alli!

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OPP: Kid Going Goth

Yi!

The son of today's OPP is going through a life change and she doesn't know if she should be concerned or not.

Yi,
My son is 12 and has made friends with some 'goths' at school. He's started listening to offensive music and wears black clothes and make-up. I'm worried this music will affect him. He still sometimes sits and watches TV with us, but I often look at him and feel like I hardly know him. Should I be concerned? What do you know about 'goths'? Can you ask other parents if they have gone through this.
Amy

Slacker says whenever he even sees a Goth; it'll be 98 degrees outside. He tries his hardest to dress down without offending people and he'll see a Goth with black head to toe, all this crap in their hair, and wonders how hot they have to be! The second you tell your child, nope you can't do something, they'll do it worse! How is the child getting all the black clothing and make-up if he's only 12, who are the ones buying it for him!? Slacker says that his mom should go Goth, if she thinks it's cool to be Goth, he won't want to do it anymore!

Steve says Goths are another group at that age to call for attention because he never sees adult Goth's. He says he thinks the kid has goals and he's really going for it, so why punish him, that's what 12-year-olds do.

What's your advice for her?

Come on… He's only 12-years-old! He's still such a child; he is going to go through at least five more phases before he's even 21.

Intern Alli!

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Worst Day Ever

Yi!

Slacker's day has been a little off! Let's start with his morning breathe; he went to brush his teeth and dropped his $250 tooth brush and broke it! Yikes! Then he dropped his iPhone and cracked the screen so there goes at least $600 to repair that. When he finally thinks he's safe, he forgets to open his garage door before backing his truck into it, there goes some more cash! Not his brightest hour.

Slacker said his bad day started last night while he was shaving his head before bed and cut his head! It was pretty intense, a lot of blood lost. While he was walking his dog this morning was when the iPhone goes down. His dog wrapped the leash around his legs a few times and drops him to the pavement. Slacker tries to act like his garage door is so quiet so he "thought" it was open, right! To add one more thing to Slackers day, he was almost hit head on in a parking lot.

Steve says he is easily at $3,000 for the day he's had so far!

What's your worst day ever?

Fine guys! I guess his tooth brush wasn't exactly $250 but it was expensive!

Intern Alli!

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UPDATE: Stop Sister's Wedding

Jen, the girl that broke up her sister's wedding because she is in love with the groom came on the air to share an update with us. Trevor, the groom didn't show up to the wedding and he had disappeared. She got this email from him and she wanted to share it with us:

Jen,
I wanted you to know that I'm okay. I've been staying with a buddy for a few days trying figure this all out. First, I want to say that I really understand how big of a leap it was for you to talk to me and I appreciate your honesty. I couldn't lie to myself, or to Amanda, and go through with the wedding because I have thought about that kiss too. What you said to me made me realize that I couldn't marry Amanda because it wouldn't be fair to her. She is an amazing woman and I couldn't marry her knowing that I was thinking about another woman, especially her sister. I know it will take some time but it will be better this way in the long run. I just didn't know how to tell her that on our wedding day and that's why I ran. I know it was cowardly, but it was the only thing that seemed logical that day.

Jen I also want you to know I ran because I couldn't be "that guy." I couldn't be the kind of man that leaves his bride at the altar to get with her sister. I need to take some time to figure all this out. I'm sorry.

Trevor

What do you think the email means?

(Image courtesy of freedigitalphotos.net)
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