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Slacker & Steve's Blog




Gets Your Goat

Yi!

Sometimes you just need to vent…and we want to hear it!

Slacker wants to complain about customer service...not customer service people themselves, but the people that hire the most lethargic, bland people on the face of the planet to be their first line of defense! He went to buy lottery tickets today. After waiting in line, he got to the counter and asked for his tickets. The woman behind the counter got upset, refused to help him and pointed to a hand-written sign that said the lottery machine was down. He said the sign was not even visable to people standing in line and there was a huge Powerball sign above the counter! He doesn't understand why customer service people get upset when they actually have to provide customer service!

What do you want to complain about? Tell us what Gets Your Goat!

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OPP: Speed Therapy

Yi!

We get a lot of OPPs…and some of them aren't quite big enough to take up a whole hour. Today we'll tackle some of those and any little OPPs you may have! Here are a few to get us started:

Yi! My nephew is graduating high school at the beginning of June and I don't want to sound like a bad aunt, but I really don't want to give him money as a gift. As of right now he has no plans for the future – no higher education of any kind, no job prospects, not even volunteer work or an internship. If he had a goal that he was working towards, I would be fine with giving him cash or a check to help him in his endeavor – but that is not the case. I asked my brother what I should get him and he told me money. When I told him there was no way that was happening – he got offended. Is it wrong that I don't want to give my nephew cash for graduation? Should I suck it up and do it anyway? If I don't give him money what should I get him? Please help!
Karen

Yi,
My boyfriend and I were having relations the other night. We we're on the couch and he reached over and grabbed a piece of pizza off the coffee table and took a bite! It totally grossed me out! Who eats during sex? Has anyone ever had someone eat while they were having relations with them and what did they say?
Chelsea

Yi S&S- I'm getting pretty overwhelmed with how popular I am these days, and by that I mean I'm up to my ears in party invites and I just can't take it anymore! It seems everyone I know is either having a baby, getting married, has a kid who is graduating, or is trying to sell candles, or jewelry, or kitchen crap. I'm not made of money and whenever I'm invited to a party that means I need to spend money I don't have to either buy a gift or order something that I don't want. Is it horrible to want to decline every invite and just hide in my home for the next few months?
Rachel

Yi! I have been seeing a guy that lives with his parents. I have my own place and he is over here about 4 nights a week because my place is close to his work. After we have relations he leaves to go back to his parents place. I told him that if we are going to have relations then he has to spend the night because I feel dirty when he "hits-it-and-quits-it". I told him from now on we will only have sex if he spends the night. Am I crazy for feeling "dirty"? Has anyone else had to do this with their man?
Katie

Do you have a little problem you need advice on? What is is it?

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Life Hacks

Yi!

Need to get crayon off the wall? Colgate toothpaste! Baked on food? Fill the pan with water and put a dryer sheet in it! These are just a few of the many life hacks we have. Here are a few more:

1. Budweiser beer conditions the hair
2. Pam cooking spray will dry finger nail polish
3. Cool whip will condition your hair in 15 minutes
4. Mayonnaise will KILL LICE, it will also condition your hair
5. Elmer's Glue - paint on your face, allow it to dry, peel off and see the dead skin and blackheads if any.
6. Shiny Hair - use brewed Lipton Tea
7. Sunburn - empty a large jar of Nestea into your bath water
8. Minor burn - Colgate or Crest toothpaste
9. Burn your tongue? Put sugar on it!
10. Arthritis? WD-40 Spray and rub in, kill insect stings too
11 Bee stings - meat tenderizer
12. Chigger bite - Preparation H
13. Puffy eyes - Preparation H
14. Paper cut - crazy glue or chap stick (glue is used instead of sutures at most hospitals)
15. Stinky feet - Jello
16. Athletes feet - cornstarch
17. Fungus on toenails or fingernails - Vicks vapor rub
18. Kool aid to clean dishwasher pipes. Just put in the detergent section and run a cycle, it will also clean a toilet. (Wow, and we drink this stuff)
19. Kool Aid can be used as a dye in paint also Kool Aid in Dannon plain yogurt as a finger paint, your kids will love it and it won't hurt them if they eat it!
20. Peanut butter - will get scratches out of CD's! Wipe off with a coffee filter paper
21. Sticking bicycle chain - Pam no-stick cooking spray
22. Pam will also remove paint, and grease from your hands! Keep a can in your garage for your hubby
23. Peanut butter will remove ink from the face of dolls
24. When the doll clothes are hard to put on, sprinkle with corn starch and watch them slide on
25. Heavy dandruff - pour on the vinegar !
26. Body paint - Crisco mixed with food coloring. Heat the Crisco in the microwave, pour in to an empty film container and mix with the food color of your choice!
27 Tie Dye T-shirt - mix a solution of Kool Aid in a container, tie a rubber band around a section of the T-shirt and soak
28. Preserving a newspaper clipping - large bottle of club soda and cup of milk of magnesia , soak for 20 min. and let dry, will last for many years!
29. A Slinky will hold toast and CD's!
30. To keep goggles and glasses from fogging, coat with Colgate toothpaste
31. Wine stains, pour on the Morton salt and watch it absorb into the salt.
32. To remove wax - Take a paper towel and iron it over the wax stain, it will absorb into the towel.
33. Remove labels off glassware etc. rub with Peanut butter!
34. Baked on food - fill container with water, get a Bounce paper softener and the static from the Bounce towel will cause the baked on food to adhere to it. Soak overnight. Also; you can use 2 Efferdent tablets , soak overnight!
35. Crayon on the wall - Colgate toothpaste and brush it!
36. Dirty grout - Listerine
37. Stains on clothes - Colgate toothpaste
38. Grass stains - Karo Syrup
39. Grease Stains - Coca Cola , it will also remove grease stains from the driveway overnight. We know it will take corrosion from car batteries!
40. Fleas in your carpet? 20 Mule Team Borax- sprinkle and let stand for 24 hours. Maybe this will work if you get them back again.
41. To keep FRESH FLOWERS longer Add a little Clorox , or 2 Bayer aspirin , or just use 7-up instead of water.
42. Gatorade is good for Migraine Headaches (PowerAde won't work)

What are your life hacks?

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Bought It and Ruined It

A London man recently crashed into a grocery store just hours after buying a new Porsche! We want to know…have you ever bought something and ruined almost immediately?

The London man who crashed his Porsche into a grocery store hours just after buying it the store manager Tom Jones said, "The chap who had the crash had just bought the car. He thought it was in reverse and accelerated straight into the fire exit in his brand new Porsche. Thankfully no-one was injured. The car had a few scratches. The door was damaged, but I don't think it was too serious."

Slacker waited in life for hours for the iPhone3 when it first came out and right after getting his new phone, he dropped it, and it skipped like a pebble across water on the concert…Just after it comes to a stop in the middle of the road a car come and runs it flatter than a pancake. Steve was close with his motorcycle…

What have you ruined almost immediately?

A while back I was vacationing with my family and got some moccasin slippers…wearing them that night I accidently stepped on one of the strings and broke it. Definitely not a big deal, but they still haven't been fixed.

Ciao!
Intern Lauren

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Road Trip

Summer is right around the corner and that means it's almost road trip time! We want to hear your most outrageous road trip story!

Road trips with friends can go badly very quickly. They key is to communicate ahead of time about your expectations. Decide what kind of activities you want to do and be honest about whether or not sharing a room is a good idea. Remember just because you are close doesn't mean you will get along on a vacation together - some personalities don't mesh when they're traveling. You may end up not being friends in the end.

A new survey by Ford and YourTango reveals that 90% of couples believe road tripping strengthens their relationship. Other findings:
- 44% of couples say the best part of a road trip is the fun and adventure
- 70% of couples love blasting their favorite music while road tripping
- 74% of couples hold hands and kiss at red lights

Slacker and Steve think that the survey from Ford is way false! They want to hear the truth, and how much you suffered! Slacker went on a road trip with his family way back in the day, being so excited to go see the ocean and of course the ocean was closed the one day they were there to see it! Lil D got on a high speed chase in the middle of Ohio, they wanted to get the car up to 100 and right as they did passed a couple of cops and just kept going, ended up running a red light and losing them in some suburbs.

What is your most outrageous road trip story?

I went on a road trip with my family and it was cool and all, just there wasn't enough space to breathe a second car would have been better. I also have gone with friend which was fine and all, but in the end two of us were so annoyed with the third that things became awkward….

Ciao!
Intern Lauren

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OPP: Should I Tell Him?

Today's OPP is from Erin, who is unsure if she should tell her boyfriend one last thing before she calls it off.

Yi guys! I'm breaking up with my boyfriend. He's not a bad guy and things might have worked out, but he has a few gross habits I can't get past. He is a nose picker and chews with his mouth open. It's disgusting. Thing is, I'm wondering if I should tell him that's why I'm breaking up with him. He's a good guy and when he finds the right girl I don't want him to blow it with her. What do you think? Should I tell him so he can try to quit?

Steve couldn't do that, he usually goes ghost, but he feels that they would just resent what was said. Slacker dated a beautiful woman, she was just horribly rude to waiters, but he never told her why he broke up with her. Slacker and Steve have mixed feeling about the "exit interview".

What advice do you have?

These seem really minor, and I don't think it is necessary to share. If they were going to stay together I would see telling him the things that bother her, but since she doesn't want to be with him then I don't see the point, even though the habits are weird.

Ciao!
Intern Lauren

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GMD: Move in Together

Yi! Today's Great Mate Debate is from Shane and Anna, a couple who is unsure if they should take a big step in a relationship or not…

Shane and Anna have been dating for a while now. Shane wants to move in together to save money, but Anna says not until you put a ring on it.

Slacker and Steve both believe that they have valid points, they cannot chose a side. Slacker and Steve understand Shane; saving money and essentially giving it a trial run, but Anna on the other hand she's young and wants to do experience life without feeling like a wife.

Whose side are you on for today's Great Mate Debate?

I am on Anna's side; I personally don't plan on living with a boyfriend unless we are engaged. It has just always been one of those things that I just don't think is good unless couples are engaged or married.

Ciao!
Intern Lauren

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No Kid Complaints

Yi!

Yesterday, we let Steve and all the other people without kids complain about parents. Today it's we're letting the people with kids complain about those without.

What drives you insane about people without kids?

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Spousal Secrets

Yi!

According to a new survey, four out of five women have lied in a relationship. 52% of women have lied about how many partners they've had before their current one...and 38% lied about why they broke up with the last guy. Most women surveyed said they have no regret after cheating while men are burdened with guilt, which explains why women don't get caught cheating as much as men. 77% of married women do not regret cheating and 81% said it's easier to cheat when you are married.

We want to know...what secret are you keeping from your spouse?

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OPP: Guy Too Good To Be True

Yi! Josie wrote us with today's OPP:

Yi,
After a somewhat painful breakup, I'm finally back in the dating pool and looking to meet a nice guy. Recently, I met a man who seemed almost too good to be true. He's handsome, intellectually curious, and charming. But I can't help feeling like he's not showing me who he really is. He compliments me constantly. Like...every second. And as flattering as that was at the beginning, I'm starting to get the feeling that he's using the compliments to deflect from answering certain questions or to avoid telling me about himself. Do you think this sounds weird to you, or am I right to be skeptical by the flurry of compliments?
Josie

Slacker said the guy Josie is seeing reminds him of Steve in the fact that he doesn't give up information to girls. Steve says guys do it because he thinks it makes him mysterious. Steve says this guy is normal in every way...other than the compliments thing.

What do you think? Is she reading into it too much? Should she be wary of this guy?

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Bug Related Incident

Yi!

A beekeeper removed a hive of tens of thousands of bees from inside a Utah couple's bedroom wall. The man and his wife moved into their home five months ago. They first noticed bees outside, then late one night, the couple heard them buzzing inside the walls. They called in a beekeeper, who found a colony of about 40,000 bees in the wall of the master bedroom. The beehive had been there for three to four years. The beekeeper removed the bees with a shopvac and put the honeycomb into boxes. He needed to remove the entire hive instead of killing the bees to prevent it from happening again.

Also, the United Nations says eating insects can help fight obesity. UN researchers found that many insects contained the same amount of protein and minerals as meat and more healthy fats doctors recommend in balanced diets. They say that eating beetles, caterpillars and ants can help people stay slim.

With spring in the air, we figured it is time…What is your bug related incident?

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Kid Complaints

Yi!

Lil D and his wife are expecting their child any day now. We've been talking about it a lot on the show, and we've gotten some angry comments from people without kids...so now we're giving the childless a voice too! We're basically giving the show to Steve to rant about all the dumb things parents do and let their kids do.

First, Steve is sick of all the parents out there updating us all with any little milestone your baby reaches. Guess what, EVERY BABY DOES THAT! And while we're on that, we all don't need to see hundreds of pictures of your kid. THEY LOOK LIKE EVERY OTHER BABY! Second, when you have a young child make your family fly to visit you. Don't annoy hundreds of other people so you can take the kid to visit Aunt Myrtle. Third, stop expecting the entire world to cottle your child the way you do! This is the real world and not everyone is going to change to make life easier for you and your kid!

What do parents do that drives you crazy? What do they let their kids do that you're sick of?

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Naughty Pictures

We got a message from a girl that took some naughty pictures for her boyfriend. Her mom needed to use her camera, so she gave it to her and mom went thru the pictures! There's no way you can get your mom to unsee that!

Steve said there are no pictures out there of him, but there is plenty of IMAX quality films! Slacker remembered a story of a teacher that was doing a presentation and used his own laptop. When he plugged it into the projector, he showed the entire class pictures of himself! Slacker said there is also a film of him somewhere. He has a big case of old VHS tapes and it's somewhere in there.

Have your naughty pics ever been exposed to someone they weren't meant for?

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OPP: Basement Baby Daddy

Yi! Today's OPP comes from Jess:

Yi guys! I've been seeing a guy and kind of got into it with him on a date the other night. He seemed uncomfortable at dinner so I asked him what was wrong. He said he saw me arguing with a guy in my basement before we left and wanted to know who it was. I told him it was my son's dad and he lives in my basement and my date got really upset. He said he didn't know if we could see each other anymore because he wasn't comfortable with my son's dad living in the same house. I told him it was strictly a business arrangement and I didn't think it was a big deal so I didn't tell him before. It's not a big deal right? The guy I've been dating needs to grow up right?
Jess

Slacker thinks it's a huge deal. Steve is the guy that dates on the show and says that this is something that probably should have come out on the first date. Slacker said if he got a divorce and rented out his basement to make ends meet, he probably wouldn't tell the women he was dating that he had a roommate...unless it was his ex-wife living in the basement. That is something that needs to be put out there right away to avoid confrontation later. Steve also said that this type of situation is more common today than ever.

What do you think? Is that something you should disclose in the early stages of a relationship?

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Lost

Yi!

Slacker lost his daughter when she got on an elevator and the door closed! He was running some errands and his daughter was wandering in the lobby. She somehow got on an elevator and started going up. Slacker had to get in a different elevator and stop on every floor to find her. He eventually found her and everything was okay.

Another time, Slacker got really drunk in Vegas and got lost in a pool. There were a ton of people in the pool and he couldn't find the exit. When he finally did find it, he couldn't figure out how to get back to his room. He eventually did find his way into Jennifer Love Hewitt's VIP cabana!

Have you ever lost your kid? What is the worst you've ever gotten yourself lost?

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Your Movie Title

Yi!

If you had to explain your love life with a movie title…What would it be?

Slacker couldn't just chose one movie he chose three; post pregnancy would be Ice Age, Lost in Translation and No Country for Old Men. Steve chose movies for himself Oh God (which is not accurate) Home Alone, and 8 Seconds…Slacker disagreed and chose the movie As Good As It Gets for Steve. Lil D chose the class Top Gun.

I think the movie How to Lose a Guy in 10 days, describes my love life.

Ciao!
Intern Lauren

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Expensive Fights

Yi!

Did you break a flat screen TV? Crash a car? Burn down a house? Sometimes a fight can cause you to do some pretty ridiculous things. Tell us how much damage did you cause in your expensive fight?

Steve's most expensive fight was being expelled from school, which isn't expensive. The big story comes from Slacker's friends. Slacker's friends are BIG wine drinkers, and his friend and all of his college buddies every year take/borrow things from each other's houses, and take pictures of it and hold it for ransom. One guy took a really really expensive bottle of wine from one of his buddies, who eventually found out who was holding it for ransom. The original owner of the wine bottle was coming over to pick up his prized possession. The couple who had it was arguing… (as parents you are always picking up toys, and sometimes even when you are arguing) her husband (wine bottle taker) made a statement similar to that he should of married his wife's sister instead of her. When that was said Dory (toy fish) was thrown and knocked down the bottle of wine which was tens of thousands of dollars. Door bell rings, just moments after the bottle of wine was shattered, and it's the original owner is there to get his bottle…

I don't think I have ever had a fight where something was broken, especially of value.

Ciao!
Intern Lauren

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OPP: Fiance out of Town

Today's OPP is from Beth!

Yi,

My fiancé is training for a new job and is out of town until the end of the month. The other night, his best friend asked me to dinner on Facebook. He said he hadn't told my fiancé about the offer. Do I go? Do I tell my fiancé? What is his friend up to? HELP! I'm new in town and hate staying home alone.

Slacker thinks that her fiancés friend is hitting on her by asking to take her out to dinner and keeping it a secret. Steve thinks that it is just an innocent dinner to make her feel less alone.

What advice do you have?

I'm on Steve's side, personally I don't think it's a big deal, why wouldn't you tell your fiancé and if he really does care then just don't go. Having dinner with your fiancé's friend shouldn't matter, and if it does, well that's unfortunate.

Ciao!
Intern Lauren

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Miserable Mother's Day

Yi!

Did your husband/boyfriend and kids blow it this weekend? Did they get you something like a 16-channe; sports package for Mother's Day? Did they totally forget? We're her for you to vent!

Slacker did nothing for his wife for Mother's Day…He says that he is not in trouble, because she didn't ask for anything. Slacker's family went to his parent's house and took them to dinner; because it was Mother's day and his dad's birthday. After dinner with Slacker's parents the kids were being rowdy, so his wife dropped him off at the grocery store, because she absolutely despises going; and he offered to walk home…on the walk home everyone and their mom (literally) was outside enjoying the nice weather. So not only did Slacker walk all of the way home carrying a watermelon, everyone was and some women even tried to pick him up… but he stayed walking (and not cheating on his wife, by the millions of women who tried to pick him up).

How miserable was your Mother's Day?

I gave my Mom her card and present early, to be fair she was with me when I ordered it and I felt that it would have been rude to make her wait.

Ciao!
Intern Lauren

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Time Machine

Yi!

Most of us have one moment in our life that, if possible, we would go back and do all over again. Did you give up on love too easy? Did you make one split second decision you regret? Would you spend just a few more minutes with someoneyou've lost?

If we had a time machine, what is the one moment in your life you would go back and relive or change?

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OPP: Small Town Girl

Yi!

Danielle joined us live on the air to share her OPP. She grew up in a small town and started her life young…marriage, kids, etc. Now that she and her family have moved to a bigger city, she's finding she might have settled too soon. She gets attention from men she never got before and can't figure out what to do.

What advice do you have for Danielle? Is the grass always greener?

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Bad Moms

Yi!

A 29 year old Texas woman traveled out of state to Missouri for three days leaving her 8 and 10-year-old children to feed and bathe themselves, while she checked her dog into a Petsmart hotel. The cops were tipped off anonymously and arrested the mother. She is facing two years behind bars for abandoning her children. Child Protective Services took emergency custody of the children.

Also, a child in Kentucky called 911 to report an overflowing toilet-- their mother was working more than 100 miles away.
Seems, mom locked her two young children inside a home. A 911 dispatcher got a call from a child asking the police to go to her home because the toilet was "broken" and "really flooding". She also told the dispatcher she was 9-years-old and was with her twin brother.
The kid also admitted her mom locked them in their home because their dad wanted to take them away. Emergency crews broke into the home and stopped the overflowing toilet. When the mother showed up, she was arrested. She's facing up to three years in prison.

Mother's Day is this weekend…you'll be praised for being a nurturing, caring mother…but we know that's not how it always is! Did you forget your kid somewhere? Drop them when they were a baby? Tell us, what have you done that made you a bad mom?

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Yearbook Photo

YI! High School Senior (and Mom) has her photo removed from the year book:

Caitlin Tiller is a senior at Wheatmore High School in North Carolina. Not only is she about to graduate, but she is also the mom of a one-year-old little boy. But her photo won't be appearing in her senior yearbook. The photo, taken with her son in her arms, was removed from the yearbook by administrators before going to print. Apparently, school officials thought the photo would somehow promote teen pregnancy.

Here's the kicker: She was fulfilling a school-mandated request to make yearbook pics more personal. Students were asked to bring something to pose with that showcases "an achievement" or "best represents them." Caitlin obviously chose her son. (Cosmo)

Slacker had his beloved guitar in his senior photo; some of his buddies had their car, baseball bat… the usual. Steve's high school never made them pose with anything, but it would have been a graphics bong… They understand that if the school printed the picture, the school would put the stamp of approval on it. She did fill the requirement, so maybe the school shouldn't place the greatest achievement on senior pictures.

What do you think?

I never had this "greatest achievement" placed on our senior pictures…Maybe just a quote at the bottom of a generic quote or future plans or even just the clubs they participated in with the school is enough…The school probably should of told the young lady sooner, that way she still could have been photographed minus her son.

Ciao!
Intern Lauren

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Bad Breakups

YI! Here are some of the most hilarious ways to tell your partner that it is over:
  • A pizza box is just one of the creative ways partners have found to tell their partner that they are ending their relationship.
  • A compilation of break-up letters posted online includes letters, personal ads and even a billboard.
  • Another person saying goodbye, shows a cheery drawing of a man riding a giraffe saying: "I think we should break up I would tell you why, but I am having a tough time describing my feelings. So I drew a picture of me riding a giraffe, instead. Sorry, ZF."
  • A guy named Kevin found out things were over when every other reader did-- in a personal ad…
Both Slacker and Steve are passive aggressive breakup-ers, and just ignore the girls until they breakup with them. They go ghost, till the girl leaves.

How bad was your breakup?

Ciao!
Intern Lauren

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OPP: Chang her Ways?

YI! Today's OPP is from Sharon, she has always stood up and fought for what she believes in, but now she might be changing her mind:

Sharon believes deeply in the feminist movement. She has rallied, held events and spoken to state leaders about the importance of women's rights. Now, a man that she is attracted to is pursuing her…but she's not sure that she can get into a relationship because it goes against many of the ideas she has fought so hard to establish.

Slacker does not understand Sharon's problem, he doesn't understand why they have to be two different things, why can't she be for women's rights and in a relationship. They don't think she is weak for wanting to be in a relationship.

What advice do you have?

Feminism is about political, economic, and social equality of the sexes. Depending on what type of feminism she believes in, I do not think that a relationship goes against any right.

Ciao!
Intern Lauren

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GMD: Mother's Day Gift for Ex

YI! Today's Great Mate Debate is from Todd and Anne:

Todd and Anne have been married 3 years. Todd has 2 children (ages 8 and 5) with his ex-wife. Todd mentioned that he plans on taking the kids out this weekend to buy their mom a Mother's Day gift. Anne is not okay with the idea of Todd buying a gift for his ex…Mother's Day or not!

Slacker buys his wife's Mothers day present, just because his kids are too little. They don't think it's a bad thing at all, they just don't understand why he's doing it since he isn't the primary care giver. Slacker and Steve don't think Todd needs to get Mother's day gifts. Todd's not with her, so why should he be the one buying the presents?

Whose side are you on?

I think that Anne needs to understand that Todd will always be the children's father and his ex-wife will always be their mother. Getting her a present for Mother's day it like a, hey thanks for raising these kids with me, I appreciate it. It's not necessarily a gift, but a thank you and since the kids are so young, can't drive/don't have income he is the one who needs to buy it.

Ciao!
Intern Lauren

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Kidnapped

Yi!

By now we've all heard the news that those 3 women who had been held captive for over a decade have finally been rescued in Ohio!

Slacker's daughter was almost abducted had it not been for some quick thinking on her teacher's part. He also said that the "hey, your dad wanted me to pick up" scam wouldn't work at his son's school because that place is on lock down when it comes to people (other than your parents) picking up children from school. They also gave some good tips on how to help prevent a child from being abducted: 1) go straight for the center of the body (the gut, the throat, etc.), 2) yell like there is not tomorrow and yell something specific like "help" or "I don't know this person."
Have you ever been kidnapped? How did you escape?

Stay Classy!
Intern Kirstyn
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MacGyver Moment

Yi!

Reddit recently asked its users to describe their most MacGyver-esque moments... Breaking into your own house with a bamboo stick, screw driver, and duct tape... fixing the alternator with a pair of pantyhose...

Slacker grew up calling the act of being MacGyver something quite different… quite racist actually and he was always so confused as to if that was correct or not. He'll just stick with MacGyver moment. One of their favorites was this story:

"When I would get in trouble as a youth of 14 or 15, my mom had a lock box with a keypad entry system where she would keep my effects (game boy, phone, laptop, etc). One night, while I was grounded, I collected dust from our grandfather clock and coated the keypad in it. I asked my mom if she could help me wash some grapes in the kitchen, and then asked to use my phone to call a friend about a group project. The water on her fingers cleaned the dust off of 4 numbers, and then it was just a matter of trying the different combinations to discover the code."

What is your MacGyver moment?

Stay Classy!
Intern Kirstyn
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OPP: Naughty Videos

Yi!

Today's OPP:

"Yi! A few weeks ago, my in-laws came to visit. This week, I got the cable bill and noticed someone ordered some "grown up movies." You know, the kind that kids should never ever ever ever ever ever see. Well, that pretty little bill came out to be a whopping $75, and I need that money because my husband (who's currently deployed) and I are on a pretty tight budget. The problem is, how do I bring it up without snitching on my father-in-law (because what if he watched them without his wife around?!) – or without embarrassing them if they watched them together?
Meg"

Slacker says that this is the type of issue that needs to be confronted; however, Slacker couldn't personally do it himself were he in this situation because it's just way too awkward!

What advice do you have?

I say Meg should just be vague and non-confrontational (don't act like it upsets her at all) and kindly ask for them to pay since they ordered it.

Stay Classy!
Intern Kirstyn

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Almost Mother's Day

Yi!

Lil D's wife is about a week away from having their baby! But, since Mother's Day is right around the corner (and right around the same time as her due date) is he obligated to get her a Mother's Day gift?

Steve says she's not a mom yet. Technically. Slacker thinks Lil D should definitely get her
present.

I don't think he's obligated to get one and ultimately, I agree with Steve and Lil D because, she's not a mother yet and women don't need a present at every turn they make in their life (I'm a woman so I can say that). Just have the baby and stop worrying about the superficial stuff.

Stay Classy!
Intern Kirstyn
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Craigslist Creepiness

Yi!
Craigslist certainly has evolved from being a resource for casual meet ups… but what exactly has it turned into? Case in point, a man in Florida posted a Craigslist ad asking for help in finding the alligator that ate his prized pig and the necklace it was wearing.

Steve doesn't really understand Craigslist or its appeal. But Slacker knows his stuff. He tried to buy a wine fridge once, but upon asking for a picture of the product (the picture in the ad was only from the catalogue) the man refused to send him one and Slacker never heard from him again. Slacker has also purchased many of his home furnishings from Craigslist.

Whether it's crazy, funny, or just plain creepy, what's your Craigslist story?

I've only ever searched for apartments on Craigslist and that's just completely scary in and of itself. But knowing what I know about this site is that I have to be extremely careful. In my search however, I never came upon any unreasonably questionable posts.

Stay Classy!
Intern Kirstyn

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Perk of the Job?

Yi!

A 12-year-old boy in Las Vegas confronted a cop after he parked illegally to buy a soda. The boy noticed the cop had illegally parked his motorcycle on the sidewalk; he recorded the incident. The boy asked the cop if there was an emergency and asked him for his badge number. The cop asked the boy if he's a lawyer and refuses to give him his badge number. The video was posted on YouTube and already has over two million views. Some people agree with the boy, while others say the boy should leave the cop alone.

Slacker thinks that you can't enforce laws that you don't abide by. Steve doesn't see an issue with it. The cop wasn't putting anyone's life in danger, so what's the big deal? Steve also said that the kid doesn't know if the cop is checking on an alarm or something like that. Slacker understands that cops put their lives on the line every day, but that does not entitle them to break any law they feel like!

Does it bother you when cops do things like this…or is it a perk of the job?

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Terrifying Teachers

Yi!

A teacher in Pennsylvania bought a copy of "50 Shades of Grey" for his 9th grade student.
He's been suspended, but the boy's mother wants the teacher fired. The boy admitted he asked his teacher for the book and the man, who is also his adviser, got it for him.
According to the school, the teacher asked students for a list of books they would like to read during an independent reading period. The teen requested "Fifty Shades of Grey" so the teacher went online and ordered the book.
A statement from the district said: "Unfortunately, the teacher did not have an awareness of this popular book and ordered it with his own money. He also ordered books for other students, all of which were G-rated."

A 26-year-old English teacher from Boca Raton, Florida, was fired from her job late last month after officials at Martin County High School discovered she was moonlighting as an "eyecandy model" under an assumed identity. She was terminated on the spot after confirming her double life, and escorted off school grounds.

Have you ever had a teacher do something crazy that they weren't supposed to do?

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OPP: Secret Admirer

Yi!

Todays OPP comes from Laurie...

Yi! I've been getting flowers and cards lately from a "secret admirer" and it's really starting to irritate me. Whoever it is keeps sending things to my office with notes like, "Do you have any idea how beautiful you are?" and "You make me happy every day." My co-workers think this is sweet, but I'm really annoyed. I HATE surprises and if this is someone I work with, I feel like it's borderline harassment. What the heck do I do to stop this crap?
Laurie
Slacker thinks this is a control thing in a weird way. By keeping you in the dark they are staying above you in the game. He says it can be intimidating and he doesn't like it. Slacker also thinks it's pathetic and Steve agrees. He compared it to someone sending you a card saying that they can see you with binoculars...that wouldn't be okay. Steve thinks that only people below your league do this. It makes them a mystery and more desirable. Steve also doesn't understand why people do this...how are you supposed to get anything started with an admirer and you don't know who they are?

What do you think she should do to stop it?

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Selling Your Body

Yi!

Some Democrats in the House of Representatives say that climate change also changes WOMEN INTO PROSTITUTES. They say that as the climate changes and food prices skyrocket, poorer women may turn to adult-relations work. They've filed a resolution for Congress to recognize the impact of climate change on women.

Slacker doesn't think it is just poor women turning to this.

Steve agrees with Slacker and thinks that some women in his neighborhood do this.

Do you think this is accurate? Have you ever sold your body to make a profit?

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Inducing Labor

YI!

Lil D's wife is pregnant and ready for the baby to come out! They tried every old wives tale to induce labor over the weekend…but nothing.

Chinese food, hot wings, Mexican food, long walks, relations… You name it Lil D, and wife tried it this weekend, but the baby still isn't ready to come out. Both Lil D and Slacker have petite wives, and they both have experienced wanting the baby out earlier for health reasons… Slacker doesn't think that any of the food wives tales help.

What did you do to try to induce labor?

Ciao!
Intern Lauren

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Amusement Parks

YI!

Did you know… Over 4,400 kids get injured on amusement rides each year. Researchers found that from 1990 to 2010, 92,885 kids under the age of 18 years were treated in emergency rooms for amusement ride-related injuries…that's an average of 4,423 injuries each year. More than 70% of the injuries occurred during the warm summer months of May through September; that's more than 20 injuries a day during these months.

Slacker is afraid of heights, but loves rides, because he knows that it is a temporary height. On the Tower or Terror (the elevator one)…They got stuck at the top, and hung out there for 90 minutes. The first few minutes he was anticipating the drop, and then an announcement came on telling everyone that it was broken, and to just hold tight. So they just sat there… until it finally dropped, which was when Slacker casually threw up on the woman next to him.

What is your amusement park story? Were you injured, stranded on a ride, or did you witness something incredible?

Because of these statics, my family never took me to amusement parks… I think I have only been a handful of times.

Ciao!
Intern Lauren
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OPP: Hotel for Prom

Today's OPP is from Halle who is facing a dilemma and needs advice.

Yi! My 17 year-old daughter asked me if she could stay at a hotel on prom night with her boyfriend. Her friends are renting rooms and she wants to be a part of the action. I trust my daughter, but not some of her friends. Since January, we have grown closer by putting some of our differences aside. I would hate to destroy that goodwill by saying NO, but understand I need to be a parent FIRST and a friend SECOND. What do I do? Should I rent her a room or not?

Slacker and Steve are standing on the fence for today's OPP. They see why a hotel would be cool, but on the other hand getting a hotel pretty much means that Halle is condoning a trashed hotel room, relations, and adult beverages being consumed. So does Halle become the mom who is the toughest and says no, or does she put her credit card on the line and potentially have a large bill from the trashed room, or even worse a grandbaby.

What advice do you have?

I am indifferent on this topic; I had a friend lose her brother, because he was so tired he fell asleep at the wheel. I see the importance of staying the night somewhere based on the sole fact of exhaustion, but I also don't think that a hotel to party and hang out with her boyfriend and friends is the best way to go. If all of her friends have hotel rooms, why doesn't she just share with them?

Ciao!
Intern Lauren

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Songs You Will Never Forget

YI!

Slacker hit random on his iPod over the weekend and the Journey song he lost his v-card to came on. Steve remembers the first song he smoked to.
It's no secret that Slacker lost his v-card to his best friend's girlfriend… but the song that was playing when relations happened was a Journey song. On the other hand the first time Steve ever got high Sublime's Santeria was on, and every time it is played, he reminisces in his youth. Lil D's first middle school make-out sesh was to a Boys 2 Men song.

What song is it that you will never forget, and the memory attached to it?

Shakira's – Whenever, Wherever… reminds me of my first trip to Mexico.

Ciao!
Intern Lauren

(Photo courtesy from freedigitalphotos.net)
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Drunk or Kid

Yi!

It's that time of the month…no, not THAT time of the month…it's time for Drunk or Kid!!! Tell us your outrageous story and we'll try to guess if you were drunk or a kid when it happened!

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OPP: Give the Teeth Back

Yi!

Jodie joined us live on the air to share her OPP today. She was engaged to be married. As an early wedding present, her fiancé's dad, who is a dentist, fixed her bad teeth. Now that the wedding is off, he wants her to pay for the teeth! She says they were a gift and doesn't think she should owe him anything.

What do you think? Should she have to pay for the teeth?

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Blaze of Glory

Yi!

A 21-year-old man went clucking mad after being fired from a Burger King in Florida. He asked if he could take time off work, when the boss said no he became belligerent and started throwing containers of chicken patties, chicken nuggets and chicken tenders around the store. He then allegedly spit in the victim's face and threatened him with a knife from the restaurant's kitchen. Cops caught him at the CVS store next door to the Burger King and he was placed under arrest.

How did you go out in a blaze of glory at your job?

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Vacation Vice

YI!

Vacation is a good time to relax and enjoy life for a few days…and sometimes it's nice to not be the person you usually are! Do you turn into someone your parents wouldn't be proud of while you're on vacation?

When Slacker goes to Mexico his whole wardrobe consists of linen and more linen, it goes as far as a black linen suit; pants, jacket and all. It's no secret that Steve is a player, but when he goes on vacation he turns into the guy who doesn't leave the hotel room; you could probably catch him watching a marathon on TLC, instead of hanging out with Paris Hilton… 3% of people say that their vacation vice is becoming trampy.
What is your vacation vice?

Ciao!
Intern Lauren

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I'm an Adult and I Can't...

YI!

As an adult what can't you do…or never have done? There are some things in life you expect everyone knows how to do: tie their shoes, swim, ride a bike, or even drive a car… but some people just never learned how.

"As the popularity of cycling increases across the country, especially in larger cities where commuting by bike is becoming commonplace, some people need to learn how to ride. There's a generation of adults who grew up without bicycles on every driveway and that means, in their middle age, it's time for them to finally learn how to ride a bike. Adult 'learn to ride' programs are popping up where groups of adults can learn the joys of biking together and hopefully feel less embarrassed by the fact that they aren't able to ride."

Slacker is convinced that his son will be this person; he cannot for the life of him convince his son that it is a safe activity. There is one thing that Steve has never done, but is sure that if forced to do could… iron shirts, Slacker also has never done this either.

What life skill did you never learn as a child?
As a child I never learned how to water ski, and I really want to learn…but now I am the oldest and when I see they younger ones water skiing and "kicking my butt" at it, it makes me not want to learn…

Ciao!
Intern Lauren

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OPP: Weight Intervention

Today's OPP is from Danielle, who is worried about her sister and the life decisions she has recently made.

Yi! I'm REALLY concerned about my sister. She's put on about 50 pounds in just one year – something out of the norm for her. Even though she says her marriage is fine and that she's happy, my family and I are thinking about putting together a food intervention for her. We're really worried about her health. How do we tastefully tell her that she really needs to get control of her eating habits?

Slacker and Steve don't like the word intervention, and think that the show Intervention has altered people's ideas, and that it works…it doesn't in this situation. She knows that she has gained weight; Slacker and Steve are stumped about the best way to handle this situation…

What advice do you have?

I'm sure Danielle's sister is aware of the weight that she has gained, but maybe suggesting going for a hike and bike ride, even getting a deal of a gym class would be beneficial. Weight is a touchy subject and I don't think that the whole family sitting down for an intervention is the best way to go.
Ciao!
Intern Lauren

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GMD: Dating Daughter

YI!

Today's Great Mate Debate is about Christine and her sister-in-law Brenda…

Christine has been keeping a very big secret from her husband, and she doesn't know how or if she should come clean. She's been allowing their 15-year-old daughter to date behind his back, because he refuses to even discuss dating until she is 17. Christine says she is a good girl. She is responsible and trustworthy. She knows her school work comes before boys and fun, but her husband doesn't want her to grow up. Her boyfriend is a sweet 16-year-old boy who lives up the street. His parents are good people and their dating is very innocent – neither one likes to party or stay out late.

Christine told her sister-in-law Brenda…and now Brenda thinks they need to tell her brother (Christine's husband). Brenda says that his role is to be the protector of his daughter and Christine is taking that away from him. Brenda thinks that Christine is making her daughter vulnerable and teaching her at a young age that she needs a man in her life to be happy. Brenda also says that Christine is taking all credibility from her husband when it comes to parenting, and down the road her daughter will use to get what she wants and potentially put herself in a bad situation.

Slacker and Steve both think that Christine is being a good mom, she is on top of, and has a handle on the daughters relationship and seems very in control of the situation. On the other hand Slacker and Steve don't think that Christine is being a good wife, and showing her daughter that in a relationship, if they disagree with things you just keep it on the down low, which in turn isn't being a good role model for her daughter.

Whose side are you on?

I agree with Slacker and Steve, but in the end Christine needs to tell her husband. To be honest both Christine and her daughter will feel better not keeping this secret. But everyone's heart seems to be in the right place.

Ciao!
Intern Lauren

(Photo courtesy from freedigitalphoto.net)
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Creepy Things Kids Say

Yi!

Children say the darndest things sometimes, but they also say some of the creepiest. We've got a Reddit list of some of the creepiest things kids have ever said

Here are some of our favorites from the thread of comments:
1. I jokingly asked "what's the best way to get a girlfriend?" 7-year-old's response: "tell her to be my girlfriend or she'll never see her parents again."
2. My three year old daughter stood next to her new born brother and looked at him for awhile then turned and looked at me and said, "Daddy it's a monster...we should bury it."
3. I was sound asleep and at around 6 a.m. I was woken up by my four year old daughter's face inches from mine. She looked right into my eyes and whispered, "I want to peel all your skin off."
4. My niece was sitting on the couch with a weird look on her face. Her mom asked her what she was thinking about, and she said, "I'm imagining the waves of blood rushing over me."
5. My five year old: "Mommy, when you die I want to put you in a glass jar so I can keep you and see you forever" to which the six year old responds "that's stupid. Where are you gonna find a jar that big?"
6. "Before I was born here I had a sister right? Her and my other mom are so old now. They were okay when the car was on fire but I sure wasn't!"
7. My daughter is four and has taken to telling nonsensical knock knock jokes (ex: "Why did the momma cross the road? Because her arms were noodles.") One day she busts this one out "Why did the butt cross the road? Because it had a plug in it."
8. My toddler went through a phase where she would just constantly say "Hi" to things. "Hi hi hi hi hi hi." One day, it came out sounding more like "die die die die" so I say to her, "What's that you're saying" and she turns to face me and just whispers "Diiieeeeeee......"
9. Getting my two and a half year old daughter out of the bath one night, my wife and I were briefing her on how important it was for her to keep her privates clean. She casually replied "oh, nobody 'scroofs' me there. They tried one night. They kicked the door in and tried but i fought back. I died but now I'm here." She said this like it was nothing.
10. My three year old son generally has a happy-go-lucky attitude, so this is pretty odd. Sometimes when he's cuddling his mommy he says, very seriously "Mom, I promise I won't ever chew on your bones. I promise."
11. A friend of mine's child told him "Daddy, I love you so much that I want to cut your head off and carry it around so I can see your face whenever I want."
12. "So I shouldn't throw him in the fire" three-year-old daughter holding her baby brother for the first time.

Slacker's favorite is, "I was tucking in my two year old. He said "good bye dad." I said "no we say good night." He said "I know, but this time it's good bye." Had to check on him a few times to make sure he was there." He's also very thankful that his own children never say anything like this.

What's the most disturbing thing you've ever heard a child say?

Stay classy!
Intern Kirstyn
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Sisters of Slap

Yi!

The annoying girl at the bar keeps flirting with your boyfriend... she made a snide remark about your shoes... you're pissed and someone has to hold you back because you're about to join the sisterhood... the Sisters of Slap!

Slacker remembered a story where this man and woman were at restaurant and a fellow female co-worker spotted the man. However, when she came up to say "hi", she said "hey baby". Ultimately the man's girlfriend got up and straight up slapped the co-worker. She didn't stop to find out why she was calling him baby and went straight for the face.

When did you join the sisters of slap?

I'm a lover not a fighter so I'm not part of this sisterhood. Yeah, come at me, bro.

Stay classy!
Intern Kirstyn

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OPP: Mom Won't Work

Yi!

Today's OPP:

"Yi guys. I have a problem that I need advice on how to resolve. My mom has been working at the same company for almost 13 years until she got laid off 3 years ago. I got a job around the same time she got laid off and I had to provide for her since then. I never minded at all, in fact I was glad to. However, she never looked for a job after she was laid off. About a year ago, I asked her if she could please try to find something because we really need the money. She refuses to get a job and says that after all of the years she's supported me, I should do the same for her. I love my mother and I'm happy to help but I want her to get a job and help at least a little. Mind you, she is in perfect health and has a clean record so I don't see why she doesn't try looking, and I am 20 years old, about to be 21 and i have a good job, but I would like to start saving at least a little bit in an account, but I am unable to because of this. Am I wrong for asking this of her?

Emadina"

Both Slacker and Steve understand her problem because she's only twenty and this is the age for Emadina to focus on herself because she's young and building her independence. However, she can't just abandon her mom, but she needs to hold her accountable on some level. Emadina didn't choose to be born and she doesn't need to pay her mother back, especially since her mother is perfectly capable of taking care of herself.

What advice do you have?

I think it's nonsense that her mother thinks that her daughter owes her… especially owes her at
twenty years old. Sure, it's wonderful that her mother supported her during her childhood (Emadina didn't ask to be born and ultimately supported, but I'm sure she appreciates that fact), but her twenty year old daughter owes her nothing more than a "thank you" because she was obviously raised to be an extremely independent and self-sufficient human. I'm around Emadina's age and I can't imagine having to support one of my parents, I can hardly support myself entirely on my own. Moral of the story, Emadina does not owe her mother the support right now and ultimately mom needs to buck up, find a job (resting on her lay off is only a cop out), and support herself because she's clearly capable!

Stay classy!
Intern Kirstyn

(photo courtesy of freedigitalphotos.net)
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Accidentally Stole

Yi!

There's a thief among us. Lil D accidentally pocketed some deodorant he was intending to buy when, deciding against a shopping cart, he decided to carry all of his merchandise which became too much for him to carry in his hands. Naturally, he put some of the items on his body so he would stop dropping them all over the store.

Slacker had serious sticky fingers when he was growing up because (according to his family's philosophy) there's a 50/50 chance that anything you put on the bottom of the cart will be free. Steve recently accidentally stole one of those sucky tube things from the drive through at the bank. He has no use for one of those so naturally he says he's going to return it.

What have you ever accidentally stolen?

I don't think I've ever accidentally stolen anything. I've done the whole "I'm hungry so I'm gonna eat this doughnut while I continue my shopping" (clearly that's something that can't wait), but I've always paid for it. I've now and again thought of putting stuff in my pocket because I didn't have a cart or basket, but I know for a fact that I would forget it and be jumped by security when I try and leave.

Stay classy!
Intern Kirstyn

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