Yi! I've met the greatest girl in the world and know without a doubt she is the 'one'. We've been together for a year and I want to ask her to marry me. The one thing stopping me from asking her is my past. I haven't told her that I spent time in prison. I'm not proud of my past and it's hard for me to even bring it up. I'm scared if I tell her she'll look at me differently and probably won't want to be with me. What do you think is the right thing to do? I'm so confused.
Thank you for your help...
P.S. I was in prison for robbery and assault...I spent 6 years there.
Slacker and Steve both know that Jake can't live this lie for the rest of his life if he chooses not to tell his girlfriend and they get married. For some people, there are just certain things that are "deal breakers" even if everything else is perfect about the other person. Even though he's scared that this will be her deal breaker, Slacker says that he needs to tell her. Somewhere down the road, it's going to come out if he keeps it from her and when that happens, it won't even be about him being in jail. It will be about him lying about being in jail. Steve thinks that yeah he should tell her, but maybe he could wait a little while. He should get her hooked in the relationship first and have a few kids and then let her know. Then, she'll only be mad for about a week and he'll just have to sleep on the couch for a little while. Oh, Steve.
I think as long as he's not the same person and that he's changed his ways, she shouldn't react badly to it. She should be happy that he wants to be truthful with her; there are so many guys that don't do that. I say just figure out a way to tell her and let her know that you're ashamed like you said and that you're not the same person. If she loves you, she'll understand that the past is the past and she should be ok with it.
What do you think? Should he tell his girlfriend (and possible future wife) that he's been to prison?